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THE GARDEN ISLAND, TUESDAY, SEPT. 17, 112.
Sketches of Young Couples
the fine 1912 model
SPECIFICATIONS AND PRICES
An. p. 1 Speed, $215.00
7 h. p. 2 Speed,..
The history if the Indian is alone mifl'ii-ifiit to entuMiti its superior quiil
ity anil position as tin? leading motorcycle, not only of America hut of the
C. ACHONG AI
Agent for the M. M. Motocycle -the machine with a rec
ord. Its beautiful lines and easy running qualities, its silent,
but powerful motor, all go to show its superiority over all
The four models of the 'M. M. line make a combination
that is hard to beat. In considering the prices quoted below,
do not forget that they apply to a line of machines that cannot
be excelled in material and workmanship.
4 H. P. Special Battery Model $170.00
4 H. P. Special Magneto Model 195.00
4 Vz H. P. Four-fifty Magneto Model 235.00
8 H. P. Twin Magneto Model 260.00
Prices f. o. b. Nawiliwili, Kauai.
C. Achone Ai
P. O. Box 62.
Up-to-date Livery, Draying and Boarding Stable and Auto
BETWEEN LIHUE and KEKAHA
Leaving Lihue every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
Leaving Kekaha every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.
ARRIVING AT THEIR DESTINATION IN THREE HOURS
W. WEBER Manag r.
Telephone 4 W Waimea P. O. Box 48
L. Y. TIM
Has entered the rent ser
vice, and has provided him
self with a big
Special attention paid to
commercial travelers. Rea
sonable rates to all parts of
p. o. box 441 ' ph. 2434
f The MAJESTIC I
Cor. Fort & Ber. SU., Honolulu
Rooms by the day, week
or month single o r i n
OPEN DAY and NIGHT
Kauai trade solicited
MRS. C. A. BLAISDELL,
HOTEL BAY VIEW
J J J
The Commercial Man's
DICK OLIVER, Manager
He Dearest Dining the first
dance I have with you be sure and
say something to me.
He Because you're so light, if
you don't speak I will not know I
have you in my arms. Princeton
The Contradictory Couple
DO YOU RECOGNIZE THIS COUPLE?
would suppose that
people who are to pass their
whole lives together, and' must
necessarily b e very often alone
with each other, could find little
pleasure in mutual contradiction;
and yet what is more common than
a contradictory couple?
The contradictory couple agree
in nothing but contradiction. They
return home from Mrs. Bluebot
tle's dinner-party, each in an
opposite corner of the car, and
do not exchange a syllable until
they have been seated tor at least
twenty minutes by the window at
home, when the gentleman, raising
his eyes from the street, all at once
What a very extraordinary
thing it is," says he, that vou
will contradict Charlotte!" "I
contradict?'' cries the ladv! but
that's just like you." 'What's
just like me?" says the gentleman
sharply. Saving that I contra
dict you," replies the lady. "Do
you mean to say that you do not
contradict me?" retorts the gentle
man. "Do you mean to say that
you have not been contradicting
me the whole of this day? Do you
mean to tell me now that you have
not?" replies the lady quietly:
when you are wrong, of course I
shall contradict you."
During this dialogue the gentle
man has been taking his brandy-
aud-water on one side of the fire,
and the ladv, with her dressing
case on the table, has been curling
her hair on the other. She now
lets down her back hair, and pro
ceeds to brush it; preserving at
the same time an air of conscious
rectitude and suffering virtue,
which is intended to exasperate
the gentleman, and does so.
"I do believe," he says, taking
the spoon out of his glass, and
tossing it on the table, ."that of df 11
the obstinate, positive, wrong
headed creatures that were ever
born, you are the most so, Char
1 o tte . '.' "Certainly, certainly,
have it your own way, pray. You
see how much I contradict you,"
rejoins the lady. "Oh? you did?"
cries the gentleman: "vou a'dmit
that?' ' ' ' If you call that contradic
tion, I do," the lady answers:
"and I say again, Edward, when
I know you are wrong I will con
tradict you. I am not your
slave." "Not my slave," repeats
the gentleman, bitterly; "and you
still mean to say that in the Black
burn's new house there' are net
more than fourteen doors, includ
ing the door of the wine-cellar?"
"I mean to say," retorts the lady,
beating time with her hair-brush
on the palm of her hand, '.'that in
that house there are fourteen doors
and no more." "Well, tlfen"
cries the gentleman, rising in des
pair, and pacing the room with
rapid strides. "By G , this is
two i of contradiction, a monster of ag
gravation, a a a Jenkins in a
blue coat! what have I done that I
should be doomed to hear such
Expressing himself with great
scorn and anguish, the gentleman
takes up his candle, and stalks off
to bed, where feigning to be fast
asleep when the lady comes up
stairs, drowned in tears, murmur
ing lamentations over her hard
fate, and indistinct intentions of
consulting her brothers, he tinder-'
g es the secret torture of hearing
her exclaim lx:twcen whiles, "I
know there are only fourteen doors
in the house, I know it was Mr.
Jenkins, I know he had a blue
coat on, and I would sav it as pos
ijivelv as I do now, if they were
the last words I had to speak!"
If the contradictory couple are
blessed with children, they are not
the less contradictory on that ac
count. Master James and Miss
Charlotte present themselves after
dinner, and being in perfect good
humor, and finding their parents
in the same amiable state, augur
from these appearances half a glass
of wine apiece and other extraor
dinary indulgences. But, unfor
tunately, Master James, growirg
talkative upon such prospects,
asks his mamma how tall Mrs.
Parsons is, and whether she is not
six feet high; to which his mamma
replies, "Yes: she should think
she w as; for Mrs. Parsons is a very
tall lady indeed, quite a giantess."
"For Heaven's sake, Charlotte,"
cries her husband, "do not tell the
child such preposterous nonesense.
Six feet high'" "Well," replies
the lady, "Surely I may be per
mitted to have an opinion: my
opiuion is that she is six feet high
at least six feet." "Now, you
know Charlotte," retorts tlie gen
tleman sternly, "that is not your
opinion, that you have no such
idea, and that you only say this
for the sake of contradiction."
"You are exceedingly polite," his
wife replies: "to be wrong about
such a paltry question as anybody's
height would be no great crime;
but I say again, that I believe
Mrs.' Parsons to be six feet, more
than six feet; nay, I believe you
know her to be full six feet, and
only sav she is not because I say
she is." This taunt disposes the
gentleman to become violent; but
he checks himself, and is content
to mutter in a haughty tone, "Six
feet: ha, ha! Mrs. Parsons six
feet!" And the lady answers "Yes
six feet- I am sure I am glad you
are amused; andl'llsay it again,
six feet." Thus the subject gra
dually drops off, and the contra
diction begins to be forgotten,
when Master James, with some
undefined notion of making him
self agreeable, and putting things
to rights again, unfortunately asks
enough to destroy a man's intellect his niolher what the ,noon-s inade
Lihue Poultry Farm
P. O. Box 106. Lihue. Kauai.
The favorite S. S.SIERRA, 10.
000 tons displacement, sails from
Honolulu Aug. 24.
First-class single t o San Fran
cisco, $65; round trip, $110.
C. Brewer & Co. Ltd.
and drive him mad'"
By and by the gentleman comes
to a little, and. passing lus nana
gloomily across his forehead, re
seats himself in his former chair.
There is a long silence, and this
time the lady begins. "I appeal
ed to Mr. Jenkins, who sat next
to me on the sofa in the drawing
room during tea" "Morgan,you
mean," interrupts the gentleman.
Now, by all that is aggravating
and impossible to bear," cres the
gentleman, clinching his hands,
and looking upwards in agony,
she is going to insist upon it that
Morgan is Jenkins." Do you
take me for a perfect fool?" ex
claims the lady: "do you suppose
I. don't know the one from the
other? Do you suppose I don't
know that the man in the blue
coat was Mr. Jenkins?" Jenkins
in a blue coat! cries the gentle
man with a groan; "Jenkins in a
bliae coat! a man who would suffer
death rather than wear anything
but brown?" "Do you dare to
charge me with telling an un
truth?" demands the lady, burst
ing into tears. 'I charge you,
ma'am," retorts the gentleman,
starting up, "with being a monster
of; which gives her occasion to
say that he had better ask his papa,
who is infalliable, and never can
be wrong. Papa, smarting under
this attack, give terrible pull at
the bell, and says, that, if tlie con
versation is to proceed in this way,
the children had better be removed.
Removed they are, after a few
tears and many struggles;' and pa,
having looked at in a sideways for
a minute or two, with a baleful
eye, draws his pocket-handerchief
over his face, and composes him
self for his after-dinner nap.
The friends of the contradictory
couple often deplore their frequent
disputes, though they rather make
light of them at the same time; ob
serving, that there is no doubt
they are very much attached to
each other, and . that they never
quarrel except about trifles. But
neither the friends of the contra
dictory couple, nor the contradic
tory .couple themselves, reflect,
that as the most stupendous ob
jects in nature are but vast collec
tions of minute particles, so the
slightest and least considered
trifles make upon the sum of
human happiness or misery.
Alexander Young Laundry
Gurantees fir A class work on
Ladies Silk dresses and Gentlemen's
Office: Territorial Messenger Service
Let us do your shopping
It's easier to catch a husband
than to uncatch him.
00 "YOU" READ THE GARDEN ISLAND?
hi .1 til A
. .il Hi' ' .. ',: , r i.r :,v a I. l.r , ,-,v - V ' '' .. II. J
0 rfl '
ifrtirf fill 1
AS i ninMr if tfuidml.ljr Stw,
o tf a smart ireatr tfuiJed by
$1.50, $2, $2.50 and uo
: i iii : !., . j 'mil ,:rm w
"the.Store for Good Clothes"
The Eleete Store
The Houte With A Reputation For Squareneat '
J.I. SILVA. Proprietor.
Mechanical, Supply Houses
I - M
INDISTRUGTABLE and KEEPSl OUT THE
HEAT. Applied same as, .Corrugated Iron Sheets 6,
7, 8, 9 and 10 feet long. All 28 inches wire. Stock on
. . ii
AGENTS FOR THE HAWAIIAN! SLANDS
There's Nothing Like
. ' . .
Makes white cake pure white.
Better and cheaper than Butter.
Ask Your Grocer.
READ THE GARDEN ISLAND $2.50