Newspaper Page Text
THE GARDEN ISLAND TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 12, 1912.
IKE (MENDER CO.
Established over 60 years
7 1 Queen St., Honolulu
Carry a pSHtfliff Billard and Six
Large Stock 0 W Pocket Tables.
filed Oak Exterior,. 7-16 Opal Glass Interior.
Best in Values That Have Ever Been
Offered the Consumer.
Supplies of All kinds.
Make our Store Your HEADQUARTERS
while in Honolulu.
C. W. SPITZ, Prop. I '
NAWILIWILI. KAUAI TELEPHONE 104
Automobiles to all Parts of Kauai, all hours, Day and Night
Careful Chauffeurs , ,
Autos and light machinery repaired. Plumbing and gas fittings.
Agents for Fisk and Goodrich Tires and Tubes, Chalmers- ".
Detroit, Hudson & Gramm-Logan Truck.
Agents for the Inter Island Steam Navigation Co., Ltd., at Nawiliwili, Kauai. ; :
From Lihue to Koloa $ 5.00
' Lawai 6.00
" " Klecle 8.00
' Makaweli . 9.00
" " " Kilauea.. 10.00
Hanalei ... 15.00
From Lihue to Waimea $10.00
" Kekaha 11.50
" Barking Sands 17.50 '
" Anahola...' :. 6.00-
Kalihiwai ...12.00 1
Haena ... 20.00
malei... 15.00 " Haena . 2
Drummers using Trucks for transportation of sample trunks, $10 and $15 per day and board to driver.
One and one-half fare for round trip.
THE KAPA1A AUTO CO.
Our lir 1012 model, 5 water,
upliolsterred liuiek, is tin ear you
are looking for if you wish totravel
in comfort niul safety,
Reasonable rates a n il careful
drivers. Social attention is (riven
, Any time you may wish to make
a hurry-up call you will firnl us
"on the job." .
Wo neatly pack and mail
Hawaii & South Seas Curio
Sperry products for the house
wife, the trade, the best that's
TO SMILE AT
"Eddie, you may read," said
the teacher. And Kddie read in a
high-pitched voice: "When Colum
bus disccvered America, lie keeled
on the ground and gaye thanks to
"Pop," said the curious little
boy, "why do words haye roots?"
"I suppose, my son," answered
the wise parent, "so the language
"Do you haye much trouble with
"Trouble! Say, I couldn't haye
more if I was married to the blam
The family man 1 was . passing
through the market when a sign
attracted his attention. It read:
"Poultry Dressed in the 1 Latest
"What do you mean by poultry
dressed in the latest style?" lie
asked the market man.
i vi uj i uic yuu imuu: cum uic
I dealer, pointing to the plucked
cnicKens witn tneir legs tied.
"Don't you see thev are all hob
Young Doctor Why do you al
ways ask vour patients what they
haye for dinner?
Old Doctor It's a most import
ant question, for according to their
menus I make out niy bills.
"Your sister's a long time about
making her appearanice," suggest
ed the young man caller.
(i "Well," said the little" brother, '
"she'd be a sight if she came down !
without making' it. '
When Mrs. Mullgatawny arriv
ed at her holiday haunt, to her
dismay she found her watch was
missing. Thinking that she prob
ably had dropped it on the thick,
soft dining room carpet, she wir
ed to the maid at home.
Let me know if you find any
thing on the carpet in the dining
room . " -
A few days later she received a
letter from the maid as follows: . ,
"Dear Madam I was to let you
know if I found anything on the
dining room carpet. This is what
I found this morning: Three
champagne corks, eighteen cigar
ends, five cigarette ends, thirty
six burnt matches and one pink
satin slipper." ' :' '
Wife Broke sgain! It seems to
rue you are always short of money.
Ilub (a poker player) It is due
to the way I was raised. Wife.
That's right; blame it on your
j First Turkey I always feel that
Washington's Birthday is our
Second 1 urkey Why so?
First Turkey Because, although
he hatchet is prominently before
the American people then, we
turkeys suffer no bloodshed.
AT ALL GROCE
"Young man," said the woman
at the ticket office, "why don't
you answer me when I ask you
whether this is a moral and proper
"Because," answered the theat
er treasurer frankly, "I'm not a
good enough judge of human
nature t o know which way to
answer without losing a customer."
p. o. box 441
Alakea Street T, II.
A horse dealer was showing a
horse lo a prospective buyer.
After running him back and for
ward for a few minutes, he stopped
and said to the buyer. "What do
vou think of his coat? Isn't he a
The buyer, noticing that the
horse h a d the heaves, replied:
"Yes. I like his coat, all right, but
I don't like his pants."
l . ( v .... n m' i
Sjnator Money of Mississippi!
asked an old colored man what
breed of chickens he considered
best, and he replied:
"All kinds has merits. De w'ite
ones is the easiest to find; but de
black ones is de easiest to hidu
aftuh you gits 'em."
"Johnny," said t h e teacher,
this is the third time I have had to
punish you this week. Why are
you so naughty?"
"Because," answered the in
corrigible youngster, "grandpa
says the good die young, and I
ain't takiu' any chances."
Fredie had just proposed to Mil-j
lie. "No, Fredie," she said "Ij
cannot marry you. The man who
gets me must be a grand man,
upright and square."
"My dear girl," said Fredie,
"you don t want a man. You
want a piano.
A mother had tried to answer
her little boy's questions in regard
to ,the future life. One day hei
came running in from his play and
said: "Ma, ma, if only my soul
goes to heaven, what will I button
my pants onto?"
They were on their honeymoon.
He had bought a catboat and had1
taken her out to show het how
well he could handle a boat, put
ting her to tend the sheet. A puff
of wind came, and he shouted in
no uncertain tone, Let go the
sheet!" No responsse. Then again:
"Let go the sheet, quick!" Sull
n o movement. A few ihinutes
after, when both were clinging to
the bottom of the overturned boat,
"Why didn't vou let go that
sheet when I told you to, dear?'
"I would have," said the bride,
"if you had not been so rough
about it. You ought t o speak
more kindly to your wife."
Lihue Poultry Farm
P.O. Box 106. Lihue, Kaua
Cor. FortA licr. Hto., Honolulu
Rooms by the day, week i
or month single o r in
OPEN DAY and NIGHT
Kauai trade solicited , '
MRS. C. A. BLA1SDELL,
Sperry flour Best on the coast
is the housewife's boast. tf.