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THE KATIONAJL TRIBUTE: WASHINGTON, D. C, OCTOBER 22, 1881,
A HOUSEKEEPER'S TRAGEDY.
One day, as 1 wandered, I heard a complaining,
And saw a ioor woman a picture- of gloom ;
She glanced at the mud on her doorstops ('twas raining),
And this was the wail as she wiolded her broom :
" Oh ! life is a toil, jnd love is a troublo,
And beauty will fade, and richeri will floe;
And pleasures they dwindle, and prices tboy double,
And nothing is what L could wish it to be.
' There's too much of worriment goes to a lwnnet;
There's too much of ironing goes to a shirt;
There' nothing that pays for the time you waste on it;
There's nothing that IaU. but troublo and dirt.
" In March it is mud ; it's blush in December ;
rThe iiiiiisunmii-r breeze aro loaded with dust;
In fall the leaves litter; in muggy September
The wall-paper rotft and tho candlesticks rust.
"There are worms In the cherries and slugs in the rooes,
And ante in the .-ugnr, and mice in tho pie;
Tho rubbish of spiders no mortal supposes,
And ravaging roaches and damaging flic.
"It's sweeping at six and dusting at seven ;
It's victuals at eight and dihes at nine;
It's potting and panning from ten to eleven;
"We scarce break our fast ere we plan how to dine.
'With grease and with grime, from corner to oentre.
Forever at war and forever alert;
No rest for a day lest the evening enter
I spend my whole life in a struggle with dirt.
" Last night, in my dreams, I was stationed forever
On a bare little isle in the midst of the sea;
My one chance of life was n ceaseless endeavor
To sweep off the waves ere they swept over me.
"Alas I 'twas no dream ! Again I behold it !
I yield; I am helpless my fate lo avert! "
-She rolled down her sleeves, her apron she folded.
Then laid down and died and was buried in dirt.
ASSASSINATION OF THE DUC DE GUISE.
Perhaps the most melodramatic assassination
in history, a vendetta of kings, as it may he called,
v-was the murder of one of the powerful claimants
.for the throne of France. The feud of Huguenot
and Catholic had deluged France in the hlood of
her hest. First, the good Admiral Coligni was
murdered at the evii day of St. Bartholomew;
in revenge the chief butcher in that atrocity,
the Due de Guise, paid the penalty of the hide
ous massacre. To his son Henri, Duke de Guise,
-descended the vendetta. France was ruled by
the feeble and effeminate Henry III, who, by
alternato coquetry with Protestant and Catholic
subjects, kept the nation in perpetual broils. A
curious civil war was carried on, led on one side
bv the Due de Guise as tho head of the Catholic
faction and the King of Navarre, Henry, Duke of
Bourlon, as head of the Protestant forces. Both
sides fought in the name of the King. Guise, re
turning to Paris against the King's command,
was saluted as a saviour by the volatile citizens,
who strewed his path with flowers. The King,
fearing a plot to dethrone him, summoned his
Swiss mercenaries and his guards to protect the
citv. But no sooner were the soldiers inside the
walls than the populace, by some sudden inspira
tion, threw up barricades at every corner and com
.pelled the ignominious surrender of the King's
forces. This is the famous circumstance so often
-alluded to in literature, which had the effect of
pushing a feeble and irresolute nature to a dread
ful crime. Finding himself so insignificant in
comparison to his cousin, the King fled from
Paris. Guise, had demanded certain conditions
Jrom the monarch, the Lieutenant Generalcy of
the kingdom, the disinheriting of Henry- of Na
varre from any right to the throne, and some
once free, granted, and summoned the Parliament
xo meet at Blois to carry out. the new arrange- j
znents. Blois possessed then 1 5S8 and possesses
it to this day, one of the most striking of the su
perb royal chateaux of France. Rising in glit
tering arabesques from the wide blue waters of
the river Loire the French Hudson it could
hold a court and an army without inconvenience.
In this exquisite residence Henry matured the
details of his crime. The Due de Guise, at the
head of the league, bishops and cardinals and
princes in his train, took lodging in the same
edifice with the King. He sat at his feet in the
Parliament. Everybody knew the hostility ani
mating the two and every one was on the qui
vive for the end. It was generally supposed,
however, that Guise, as the more resolute, a tried
warrior and consummate plotter, would strike
the King first Guise's creatures filled the Par
liament. Every vote went against Henry. To
the anguish of the day of the barricade was
tvdded the humiliation of their mastery of the
estates under his very eyes. Catherin e d e Med ici ,
-his mother, mistress in all the arts of guile, was
present, but the King held no counsel with her.
He reflected with bitterness on his concessions.
In vain had he altered the order of succession,
forever excluding a Protestant prince. In vain
had he changed all the great offices of state.
His servants were faithless. Under his very eyes
the grasping leaguer w;is the head of the state.
He came to a decisive resolution. On the 18th
of December, 1538, while the queen mother,
Catherine de Medici, was celebrating a great
fete in honor of a marriage of a member of her
iamily, her son Henry summoned the three most
intimate members of his Council. " What am I
to do?" said he; "this man masters me in my
own palace.' It was resolved that Guise deserved
death. The colonel of one of the King's regi
ments was summoned. The situation was ex
plained to him and the King asked, "Do you
think the Duke of Guise deserves death?"
"" Yes," said the colonel. " Will you give it to
him ?' said the King. "1 am ready to challenge
him." "That," responded the King, "is not
what Is wanted; as leader of the league, he is
guilty of high treason." " Very well, let him be
tried and executed.' " But," continued the King,
"nothing is less certain than his conviction." "I
am a soldier, not an assassin," concluded the
Dismissing the soldier, the King took the job
in his own hands. He caused twelve long pon
iards to be made in the town. With these he
armed several members of the guard in whom he
could trust Everybody but the Duke of Guise
seems to have had a suspicion of what was going
on. On the day before the murder, December 22,
1588, he found under his plate a line, "The King
means to kill you." He sei.ed a pen and added,
""He dares not' and threw the scrap under the
lable. On the morning of the 22d Henry-, the
King, arose at -1 a. m. He opened a secret corri
dor with his own hands, admitting the men he
had selected for the jussassination. He gave them
the long glittering poniards with his own hand.
He then placed them in position. All the apart
ments of tho King's suite communicated through
each other and this offered additional opportu
nity for the King's purpose. Then the King re
tired to his closet to await his council, to which
Guise had been invited. As the Duke climbed
the naarow spiral leading to the royal wing one
of the guards trod on his foot to warn him that
there was mischief brewing. On entering the
large council chamber Guise felt chilled, and
stood leaning against the tall mantle, eating bon
bons. It was remarked long afterward that the
Duke seemed uneasy. His wound on the side of
the head became inflamed and his nose began to
bleed. In a moment the great doors were opened
and the King's secretary said: "His Majesty de
sires to see the Duke." Guise drew his cloak
well about him and threw his box of bon-bons to
the group about the table and set out for the
King's private cabinet. He crossed through the
King's audience chamber, filled with courtiers,
who regarded him with frowns. Just as he
pushed the tapestry aside to penetrate the bed
chamber the guards behind him closed in upon
him. Fhe daggers were thrust into his neck,
breast, and veins. "God's mercy" was all the
unfortunate man could say. But though half
murdered he was by no means vanquished. He
dragged the murderers clear across the room by
a prodigious effort, then fell with his back to the
ground, right at the side of the King's bed. The
noise served as a signal for the King, ne pushed
in from the adjoining cabinet. He regarded his
dead rival with mingled satisfaction and terror,
exclaiming, " My God, how large he is!" The
Cardinal of Lorraine, who was in the next room,
heard tho struggle and said, "They are killing
my brother, the Duke of Guise."' He had hardly
uttered this when the King's guard seized the
haughty prelate, bound him in chains and with
the Archbishop of Lyons immured him in one of
the villainous crypts of the palace. The Arch
bishop was released the next day. but Lorraine
followed his ambitious and aspiring brother. "I
am sole King," said Henry, entering the great
chamber where the Ministers sat. Then to his
mother, Catherine de Medici, he startled her with
the joyousness of his air. "You look better." "I
feel better. This morning I have become King
of France again. The King of Paris is dead."
Then the tender mother observes solicitously:
" God grant that you become not King of noth
ing at all. I hope the cutting is right now for
BIG HUSH MONEY,
Governor Murray tells a laughable story of his
experiences in the Georgia march to the sea.
which is worth repeating.
"Speaking of the famous march through Geor
gia," said the Governor, "I never shall forget. the
amount of money it cost us to keep on old woman
from crying herself to death. Of course we were
obliged to subsist off the country as we went
along, and Ave naturally took about the best in
sight. One day we took possession of a chicken
ranch kept by an old lady, who stood at the front
irate with a broom in her hand and threatened to
lick all of Sherman's forces if they did not move
on. Now chickens were considered as officers"
meat, and as we were infernally hungry we went
for these old hens pretty lively. When she saw
that her favorite fowls were being caught and
killed she keeled right over and began to cry.
Presently she began to scream, and finally you
could hear that woman's yells clear to Atlanta.
I sent the surgeon in to quiet her. but he failed,
and then all the officers took turns, but the more
attention paid her the more she howled. I then
got pretty nervous over the infernal noise, be
cause the whole army would hear it, and they
might suppose somebody was torturing the
woman. Finally, Sherman rode up and asked
what it was all about, and when Ave told him he
said: "Give her a bushel of Confederate bonds
for her hens, and see if that Avon't stop her."
Acting on this hint, I proceeded to business. We
had captured a Confederate train the day before
with 4,000.000 of Confederate money, and I
hunted up the train at once. The money was
worth about iavo cents on the dollar. Well, 1
stuffed about half a million dollars in an old
carpet-sack and marched into the house.
"Madam, said 1,' oiening the sack, 4 I'll give
you $50,000 to quit this noise.' It Avas as still :is
death in a minute, and then her face expanded
in a broad smile. I laid the packages of money
on the table, and I never saw such a delighted
woman. The effect pleased me, and I continued:
"General Sherman presents his compliments and
$100,000." 1 never in my life saw such a pleased
old woman, and I wound up by dumping the
contents of the sack right down on the floor, and
telling her that when it came to contributions to
distressed females 1 could be outdone by no man
"She invited the officers to supper, and she
cooked very chicken on the ranch and set out
cider as free as water. We were having a pretty
good time, Avhen a long, lank old coon came in,
and she said it Avas her husband. Pretty soon his
eye fell on the money. 'Sarah,' said he, 'where
in blazes did you get all this darned truck ?'
"'A present from General Sherman.' said she.
""Taint worth a continental cent: they're
kindling fires with it down in New Orleans.'
"The old Avoman ro-e up, her face as Avhite as
your shirt front, aud her 'ye wasn't pleasant to
"'So you are the bilk that gave me this, are
you,' she called out, reaching for the old broom.
"The entire mess rose and started from that
house. We never heard any more of her, and
there isn't a man of the crowd who would meet
tlrat old Avoman for all that Confederate money,
if it would bring one hundred cents on the dollar
at the Treasury Department, Washington." Salt
If you drink in the morning a draught half of
Avater, half of coffee, with a big pinch of salt, you
Avill not desire to drink again until dinner time.
We can fix up a beverage of which, if a person
drinks, he will want nothing more for several
davs at the least.
Covetousness brings nothing home.
THE ENGLISH-CHANNEL TUNNEL,
If is amusing to notice the excitement Avhich
Sir K. W. Waikins speech as to the practicabil
ity of the tunnel under the Channel has produced
among Englishmen. Already many of them hear
in imagination the tramp of infantry through
the tunnel which is to connect Calais with Dover.
We are told that the English end of the tunnel
may be seized by a descent on tho const of Kent
and a coup dc main or that a cavalry force might
be sent through the tunnel itself to seize the
English end; and that, in either case, if that end
could be held by the invader for a few hours the
tunnel itself Avould soon bring reinforcements
that would swell the invading force to one far be
yond any that Ave could bring to meet it. All
this does not seem to us in any military sense a
very alarming prospect. It is surely as certain
as anything can be that no structure of the kind
could be used by either France or England for
offensive purposes, if the slightest care Avere taken
beforehand to render such use impossible. Either
rountry might have the means of destroying the
tunnel at pleasure, and that, too, even though a
foreign power held the ent ranees on both sides the
Channel. What Avould be morceasy than to haATe
an electric communication direct with some point
of the tunnel under the mid-channel by which
you could at an instant's notice destroy the tun
nel by merely exploding a carefully-prepared
magazine? Besides, it is no easy thing to get a
military force of any magnitude into a long trap
such as the tunnel Avould be, Avhere it might be
destroyed Avithout seeing an enemy, or fired upon
and annihilated just as it arrives at its destina
tion. We cannot say that Ave are in the least
impressed by the military rashnes of the proceed
ing. If the British government eonld not, by a
little precaution, absolutely secure such a tunnel
against being tuade the instrument of a continen
tal invasion, the British government must be the
most futile government in the Avorld. London
A BIG SHEEP RANCHE.
It comprises 20,000 acres of some of the very
best land in Dakota, and is owned by John W.
Bookwalter, recently candidate for Governor of
Ohio. It is on Mission Creek, fifteen miles from
the Kansas border. On this ranche are 13,000
sheep, and the number is constantly increasing.
The great West contains many gigantic farms.
Sheep and cattle raising requires, of course, many
acres, but some of the corn and Avheat farms are
also very large, running into the thousands of
acres. In Europe small farms have been found
the most productive, and east of the Alleghanies
one and tAvo hundred acre farms are the rule,
larger ones the exception. But the machinery
Avhich has heen invented Avithin the last quarter
of a century has made it possible to convert a
farm into a species of manufactory. Land is
required to use machines to adAantagc, and men
of means have discovered that if land is cheap
and the rates of grain transportation to the sea
ports very Ioav, that it pays to invest money in
machinery to till large farms. Some day this
Avill create political trouble, for it will not be
possible to Avork a small farm economically by
the side of an immense plantation, the owner of
Avhich has Avealth and machinery. There has
been a great revolt already in California against
the ownership of so much land by very few per
sons, and Avhere vacant land is all taken up
the landless Avill view Aviih envy the vast farms
owned by the, feAv rich men. From J)emoresl,8
Monthly for Xovemoer.
Traveling not long since Avith Judge S. in a
railroad ear, the conversation turned on the value
of contentment, and the Judge remarked that it
is hard to find any one Avho is content Avith his lot.
A man offered his farm to anybody Avho Avas
content. He Avould make a free gift of it to any
happy soul that av:is entirely satisfied Avith the
allotments of Providence. Accordingly, a per
son who had heard of the generous overture
called on him and claimed the farm. "lam
come," says the visitor, " to accept that offer of
"Are you content?'
" Certainly I am."
"Then Avhat do you Avant with my farm?"
This is an old story, but he gave it :is a new
one. A Philadelphia lawyer, well knoAvn as a
successful advocate and .attorney, encountered
at a fashionable Avatering-place three New York
nabobs, with Avhom he Avas well acquainted. He
amused hiself by listening to their financial plaii3
and projects for adding to the collossal fortunes
they had amassed, and at last, in a brusque Avay,
offered to bet a basket of champagne that he
had more money than any one of them.
They looked at him and smiled incredulously.
"Yes, of course it is earnest."
"Well," said one, "I think 1 will take that."
Number tAvo intimated that he would be
happy to do likewise, and number three Avas not
afraid to follow suit
In rotation they made a statement as nearly
accurate as they could of the amount of their
"Noav sIioav your hand," said numter one.
"I have all the money I want," was the reply,
"and by your own showing that is more than
If the lawyer had all the money he wanted, it
is to be hoped that the three additional baskets
gave him all the wine that was necessary to fill
his cup of contentment. Betting, even under
such circumstances, is a practice for which Ave
know no apology. The lawyer was smart, at
any ra te. Jn tell i yen eer.
A traveler once visiting the light-house tit Ca
lais, said to the keeper : "But what if your lights
should go out at night ? '' ' Never impossible ! "
he cried. " Sir, yonder are ships sailing to all
parts of the world. If to-night one of nty
hunters were out, in six months I should hear
from America, or India, saying that on such a
night the lights at Calais light-house gave no
warning, and some vessels had heen wrecked.
Ah, sir, sometimes I feel when I look upon my
lights as if the eyes of the whole world were
fixed upon me." No one knows how much sor
row and suffering may ensue from a single ne
glect of duty.
GEORGE E. LEMON"
WASHINGTON, D. C,
Attorney -at-Law and Solicitor of
United States and Foreign
Established in 18G."3.
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Send a rough .sketch or (if you can) n model of your
invention to Gkokok E. Lf.mon, Washington, D. C,
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and yon will be advised -whether or not a patent can be
For this Preliminary Examination No Charge is Made
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If yon are advised that your invention in patentable,
send $20, to pay Government application fee of $15, and
5 for the drawings required by the Government. This
amount is payable when the application is made. This
is all of the expense, unless a patent is allowed. When
allowed the attorney's fee ($25) and the final Government
fee (?20j is payable.
By these terms you KiOw leforehand, for nothing,
whether you are going to get a patent or not, and no
attorney's fee is charged unless you do get a patent.
An attorney whose fee depends on his success in obtain
ing the patent will not ndviJe you that your invention
is patentable, unless it really is patentable, so far as his
best judgment can aid in determining the question;
hence, you can rely on the advice given after a prelimi
nary examination is had.
DESIGN PATENTS and tbe REGISTRATION OF
LABELS and TRADE-MARKS secured.
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fully and 'skillfully prepared and promptly pro-eeuted.
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If you have undertaken to secure your own patent
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case, giving the title of the invention and about the date
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Interference Contest arising within the Patent
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Copies of Patents furnished at the regular Govern
ment rates, (25 cents each, if subsequent to 1866. Pre
vious patents, not printed, at co-t of making copies.)
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ment of Patents.
In fact, any information relating to Patents and to
property right- in inventions promptly furnished on the
most reasonable term,.
Remember thte oilice has leen in successful operation
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ence. Reference givwn to actual client- :n almost every coun
ty in the United States.
Address, with .-tamp for replv,
GEORGE E. LEMON,
WASHINGTON, D. C.
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A BEAUTIFUL HOOK KOK THE ASKIN4J I
By applying personally at the nearest office of THE
SINGER MANUFACTURING CO. (or by iostal card if
at a distance,) any adult person Avill be presented with a
beautifully illustrated copy of a New Book entitled
STORY OF THE SEWING MACHINE
containing a handsome and costly steel engraving frontis
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ORGANS AND PIANOS.
Daniel F. Bealty's Manufactory,
Cor. Railroad Lve., fc Bentty St., .
Washington. New Jersey. United States of America.
Over three (3) acres of spaco with eleven
(11) additional acres for Lumber Yards &c. )
V, TheLargest and Most Complete Estab
lishment of the kind on tho Globe.
VISITORS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME.
GRAND ORGN. New Style
No. 9000, 27 STOPS U Oct
aves of the Celebrated GOL
DEN" TONGUE REEDS- It
is the Finest Organ ever
made. A Caveat is filed
at the Patent Office, to pro
tect it. lib other manufact
urer can build this Organ,
Price with Stool.Mu
sic and Book only
Cabinet. Parlor. Chanel & Pine
urgans, jau ana upwarus, in great variety.
. - - . . ' . I - -r
and UPRIGHT $135
to $1600. Warranted
If you cannot visit me be
auretosend for Lutest
Uf'acturnr htiiI snvo rmi1rilfmenn TrnfitS. Write for
trwi !-- kv ! in ! inuii mmrw h
list of names of purchasers. Adduku or call opow
u,-..- DANIEL F. BEATTY.
Washington, New Jersey, United States of America
)& a -- 'ILuvSsSS
11 1 B frr ""Tf''rW1 L
lil ' Q rEN! 5 fi(L
Answers to Correspondents.
We are ohlifred to niLswf r ctTtnln Inquiries of the famo
nature in each isMic of our pajnjr. "Wliile we cheerfully
furniwh information to .suleriherH in this column, we
suRKest that much labor, time, and expense may be saved
both to ourselves and to our correspondents, if the latter
and other subscribers would keep file of Ihe paper.
They could then, at any tinw, turn to the file and proba
bly find the very inquiry answered alnnit which they
would have written to us. "Ve trust that eaeh and every
Mib.Hcriber will profit by this suea!.'01'-
"SuiJscRiiiKK," South Bend. Ixo. If :i soldier
dies aftT iliM'harjrf without having filed an appli
cation for pension, his widow is act entitled to ar
rears; but if lie had an application pending at his
death tho widow may, by completing his claim,
draw from date of discharge; or, if the soldier was
a pensioner, hut had not drawn from date of dis
charge, the widow is entitled to the arrears from
the dato of his discharge to the date from which lie
commenced to draw.
A. T. K., IIkumox, X. Y. You are not entitled
to bounty, unleo the disability on account of which
you were discharged was a wound, or injury in the
nature of a wound, (not a disease), because you did
not serve two full years.
.Fas. H., (Jkeen Garden, 111. 1 lot a son in the
army and am an applicant for a pension. My wife
died about two years since. Q. Will 1 draw from
the date of my son's death? A. No, only from the
date of your wife's death.
H. R, Elm ik a, X. Y. The National Guard are
not allowed bounty, and no land warrants have been
provided fur service in the late Witr.
,Tak, Raci.ve. Wis. The mother of a deceased
soldier, in order to obtain a pension, must prove
that she was wholly or in part dependent upon him
for support at the date of his death, and that he left
neither widow nor minor child or children surviv
Andrew C, Mohawk, N. Y. T am a pensioner
of the war of 1612. Q. Jf 1 should die will my pen
sion go to my wife, and what steps will be necessary
in order that she may secure it? A. Your pension
will go to your wife. She will be required to file a
declaration and prove her marriage.
F. D., Stephenson. Mich. Having served less
than two veal's and been discharged by reason of
sickness and not on account of wounds, or injuries in
the nature of wounds, you are not entitled to boun
ty. Should the additional-bounty bill become a law
there would be something coming to you under its
Addresses wanted :
1. Some two or more members of company D, Fourth
United States Veteran Volunteer Infantry, Han
2. J. J. Fisher, company B, One Hundred and third
3. Captain A. V. Schaumberg, who was in command
of company U, Fourteenth. Veteran Reserved
Corps in ImG-1-5.
4. Charles Shut, late company K, One Hundred and
twentieth Ohio Volunteers.
5. James T. McDorman. William H. Hilyard, John
T. Fry, Washington France or William Turner;
company IE, Fifty-ninth Indiana.
6. Dr. W. S. Houston, surgeon in charge of second
division hospital. Sixteenth Army Corps, Mont
gomery. Alabama. June, lSoo, or W. II. Ashley,
7. Captain Krenezkyoer. Sergeant Krause, Hept.
iiluinm or William Mondorf, late company G,
First New York cavalry.
. Remaining answers next week.
CHART OF THE REBELLION,
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