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Sunday Washington globe. (Washington, D.C.) 1901-????, December 22, 1901, Image 8

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Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn82016353/1901-12-22/ed-1/seq-8/

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8 THE SUNDAY GLOBE WASHINGTON D C DECEMBER D i OJ MBER 22 1901
WHY lIE lIERESIGNED lIERESIGNEDPostmaster RESIGNED RESIGNEDI I
Postmaster General Charles CharlesEmory CharlesEmory
I
Emory Smith Lets Go On OnTHE OnTHE
I I II ITHE
THE LAST DAY OF GJJAGE GJJAGEA G ACE ACEA A C E EA
A Congfossioiial CQIIruStlo II II I Do Uomnnll ma ml for u u 1 Type Typewritten Typeuvrltton ¬
written Copy of An Investigation 11Ivl1lt InvwtignttouIntotho ntlon ntlonIntotho
1 Intotho 11 to tho Supply Division OIvlsfonolthc olt ho Post Postofllco l Postoffice ost ostof11ce
office Department Cruised Sir Smithto Smith Smithto Smithto
to Strike Ills PlagJfikoy Plajc Fla Mlkoy Iowls TowlsGhCn LowisOivon IowlsOlvon
Olvon a Few Days to llaslgn llaslgnCharles UoIllnCharles ItosigiaCharles
Charles Ilniory Color Smith is a newspaperman newspaper newspaperman newspaperman
man man He knows when a newspaper man manhas manhas manhag
has facts And he also knows that facts factsare factsarc factsare
are stubborn things Charles JJmory smith smithresigned itnithresigned Imithresigned
resigned as a Postmaster General Gcner l of the theUnited theUnited theUnited
United States because he knew that a a doc document doc1ment doet ¬
ument of fortyfive pages of typewritten typewrittencopy typewrittencopy typewrittencopy
copy would be called for and that Tuesday Tuesdaylast Tuesdaylast
last was the last day of grace The SUN SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY ¬ j
DAY GLOHK demanded the production of ofthis ofthiB ofthis
this document and through its alliancesand alliances alliancesand a11iauceaand
and friends it was 8S to be forthcoming by byCongressional byCdngre byCongresional
Congressional Cdngre lonnl resolution The document documentis
is the typewritten investigation inv tiaUon of a Con Congressional Conitfe8siocH Congresaionat ¬
gressional committees inquiries into the themanagement the111anagemeut themanagement
management of the supply division of the thepostoffice thepoetoffice thepostofAee
postoffice of which Mikey fb Lewin is stillthe still stillthe till tillthe
the superintendent superintendentCircumstantial su superintendentClrcumstrtntfal rbtendent rbtendentClrcum
Circumstantial Clrcum ntial evidence is held to be bestronger bestronrer bestronger
stronger than direct evidence and al i it itswhen is iswhere iawhen
when there is no missing Isl1 link or weak weakspot weakspot weakspot
spot Bear with us therefore gentle reader readerwhile readerwhne readerwhile
while we recite the following followingIn followln followlnIn
In the first place a person who whose business bu buaineaswas businessTM ia11 ia11wu
wu TM rained by the wicked wi ked tactics of a sub subordinate nb nbrdinate abordinate
ordinate of Chart Btnocy Smith S Seittth hl1 having havinggreat havingeat havinggreat
great eat faith in President Pre idewt Roosevelt desire desireto direto deaireto
to right any acts ad a of govern IOfttlInaental mental wrung wrungthat wronathat wrongthat
that come to hia knowledge lutewl hall ha within withinthe withhtthe withinthe
the past three months been collecting and sndarranging andarranllate andarranging
arranging exceedingly damaging facts in inconnection in ineo inconnection
connection eo aectioM with affairs in the PostOffice PoatOfficeDeaarttrent PostOfficeDepartment PItOfficeDeparta
Departa Department at in connection with the Post PostmasterGenerals Post1DIItIefQellerallI Poatmaur ¬
masterGenerals maur Genenala office o and a congres congressional cougreasdonal ¬
sional 01 fatrestifratioti would surely have havebeen havebe havebeen
be been the tlae he outcome had not a friend ot the thePostmaster thePoetGeneral thePoatwlMer
PoetGeneral Postmaster General asked 1ted for a stay of pro proceedings prolor proceedlrtga ¬
ceedings lor a reasonable rea50na le time and then thenthe t ttbe theftthe
the thing was aA temporarily suppressed bat batallusion blatal1uaion butallusion
allusion was made in these columns two twoweeks twoweeks twoweeka
weeks ago of a dark cloud which overhung overhungtbe oftrbungtbe overhungthe
tbe PostmasterGeneral POtItl uterGeauI office oce and would wouldsurely wouldlurely wouldsurely
surely burnt in the near future Now Nowtated as asstated asstated
stated we happen to know that last Tues Tueaday Tuesday Tue Tuey ¬
day y was WI the very er last day of respite that thatcottkl thatk1 thatcould
could k1 be granted in this matter and tbat on onWednesday onWiaaaadaT onWedttaday
Wednesday congressional attention would wouldJta wouldJtave would7ravebeakaired
Jta Jtave 7ravebeakaired e been bee ealfed lfed to the th CMC of the Post PostmasterGeneral Post1I1a1teGeral Postataeter ¬
masterGeneral ataeter Geuersl with itk nothing notkh but disastrous dlsastmttsreaults disastrousresult dllWlttottlT
result T ultll to follow followFor r fnUowFor tlow tlowFor
For the benefit of the u th incoming Post PostmasterGeneral Po6tmMteO PeatmuterOerer
mMteO masterGeneral we weto4ayreprint today mnrint Nptint our ouetlrtide ouetlrtideof U article articleof rilele rileleof
of May a6 361ut but at and which wldclHftultelll resulted In a con congressional eo eolon1 eoagreeeional ¬
gressional lon1 investigation bearing rhll eat the thefacts thelacta thefacts
facts we state and nd the position of the thePostmasterGene thePosltnuterQc thePostmasterGeneral
PostmasterGene l in this affair can be bedetermined bedetenni bedetermined
determined detenni ecl when we say Ill that in spite of that thatinvestigating thatio thatInvestigating
investigating io ttptlng committee report the indi individual indiYid fndiddual ¬
vidual Yid al to whom it refers Mikey Lewis Lewisrstill Lewlml Lewismill
mill ml holds his k important position po ition and andin Rudin andin
in spite of this fact the retiring Postmaster PoatmaaterGeueral P08tl PostmasterGeuelal uter uterGeaeral
Geueral asks a confldinc and swindled swin led pub public pubtic ¬
Ats lic to believe that the prime cause of hit hitresignation hi tie tieiesigeation
resignation 1 fc ation wan I his inability laabllit to properly properlyJive properlyJive properlylive
Jive on hi his h iucome Was there ever any anything any1hing ¬
thing more inconsistent with the circum circumtanttal drca drca1ttant1a1 efrcuetstantial
tanttal evidence connected with this thl case casedear eRsedear easedear
dear reader And mind you the item of ofink ofiak ofink
ink was intentionally left out of the printed printedcontract printedcontract printedcontract
contract for supplies for PostOffice Post OMee De Department Department Department ¬
partmentNow partmentNow partment partmentNow
Now here U i the Ut article from our Ala Uleawhich 1111 1111which Alawblek
which keys ke the whole business and explains explainsto erpl ln lnto
to even the obtuse and confirms any doubt doubting tloubting doubting ¬
ing Thomas why Charles Emory 1 mory Smith re resigned reaigned reaigued ¬
signed rather than have that report on onMikey onJoIlkey onMikey
Mikey I Lewis wis of fortyfive pages turned turnedover turnedover turnedover
over to Congress Congre But while the P M G Gsacrificed Gcriticed Gsacrificed
sacrificed criticed himself rather than go out of ofoffice oCoffice ofomee
office under Congressional fire Mlkey
Lewis wilt not be saved He must go for forthe fortile forthe
the same Congressional inquiry or demand demandwill demandwl1l demandwill
will be addressed to Mr Payne Mr Smiths Smithssuccessor Smlthaaucceuor Smithssucceaor
successor providing Lewis doc does not hand handin handin handin
in his resignation before the assembling mbllng of ofCongress ofCo ofCongress
Congress Co gre after the holiday hoUda recess Here is isthe Ittbe isthe
the article and the milk in the cocoanut of ofCharles ofCharlea ofCharles
Charles Bmory Smiths resignation resignationRead relignationRead resignationRead
Read it carefutlv carefutlvThe carefllnyThe earefunyThe
The Gtoll GLOHH believes that First Assistant AssistantTostmasterGcneral AAioislAntPOIItmalter AawistLntPostmasterGeneral
TostmasterGcneral POIItmalter neral William Jolinfoti JO1n nn I = in inhonest inhoitat In Inhoaatotlcial
honest hoaatotlcial official and that biB Chief Clerk ClerkMr Clerklr ClerkIr
Mr lr Masten fa a capable bright bricbtand and efficient efficientgentleman ellcientJrtI ei cient cientgentleman
JrtI gentleman The GLOBB Gw is aware of the dif difficulty dirflicultY difAculty ¬
ficulty and embarrassment Mr Johnson en encountered encountered encountered ¬
countered in his wellmeant efforts to topllrify topllrifyhis topurifyhis purify purifyhis
his department and free the public service servicefrom MrYiceIrom servicefrom
from the gang P C of pap suckers left him by byMark byMark byMark
Mark Hannait protege Mr Perry Heath HuthIn HeathIn HeethIn
In the language of the street Mr Johnson Johnsonis
is up against it in his hi herculean efforts effortsto effortsto effortsto
to shake the headcenter and chief fugleman fuglemanof f uglemanof
of Heaths malodorous administration one oneMichael oneMIchael one3llchael
Michael Lewis or Mikey for short as a the theboys theboYM theboys
boys call him Mikey or Mickey iA J the theChief theCllief theChfef
Chief of the Supply S pply Division of the Post Postoflee POitollee PontoMee
oflee Department and his record as Gov Government Govr81ent Goverament ¬
ernment puprsgeker pap sucker is aa varied as the poIiticaLcosneetions po political poJiticalco
IiticaLcosneetions Jiticalco litical connections oectlon 1 he has at one time or orother orother orother
other possessed poaseaedPer possessedFor pOtlHMedPor
For Mickey iif ia a Democrat Del ocntt and a Re Republican Kepubli Republican ¬
publican publi and vice Ice versa several times timesover thu thuoer Untaover
over No political party comes ao amiss am to toMike tolike toMike
Mike like provided Jlrorid d it is in power and a d have haveoffices hneotiea haveof
offices of see in it ita gift He started in i serving avvi r hi hiadopted hEadopted his hisadopted
adopted country in a minor capacity in the theGovernment tlteGor theGovernment
Government Gor met Printing Office years and years yearsago 11C1Nago yearsago
ago A change occurred and Mr Cleve Cleveland Cleveland City Cityland ¬
land assumed umetl the reins but the change changedidnt changedidnt changedidnt
didnt get the start on Mikey he kept up upwith upvilh upwith
with the th procession and was lOOn solid1 solid1with lIOlId lIOlIdwith sohdwith
with the lb Mw ew Public Printer Benedict BenedictMikey BenedictMike BeuedietMikeyscstitpaigu
Mikey Mike Mikeyscstitpaigu s campaign does 00 him himcredit credit He got gotthe gottbe gotthe
the correspondent in the Newspaper N per Row Rowwhom Rowwhom Rowwhom
whom he had obligated < l by furnishing furnishingthem luraihingtbe furnishingthem
them tbe forbidden documents from the tb print printing printllg printing ¬
ing llg office loaded in two hacks and dump dumping dumpiug dumplug ¬
lug them out at Benedicts aedlct office they did didthe didtbe didthe
the rest Mikey was retained grew fat fatand fatand at atatsd
and prospered prosperedTo
To show his If ass > > new political friends lries his hisgratitude hisgrtitude hisgratitude
gratitude be furnished the office the names namesof santeeof namesof
of offensive offllOO Republican partisans partisansand partiN partiNand partieassand
and Benedict promptly cut their heads he ds off offwhereat oftwhereat offwhereat
whereat Mikey laughed with ghoulish ghoulishglee grlotdieheke gpouliehAke
glee and put ut hia thumb Is line Ii with his hisna hietiMe hisnow
na tiMe e and wagged hisfingers at the depart departments desrtmeat departmeats ¬
meats meat guests guestsHarrison gtHiMaUarrleon gnstsrlartleon
Harrison succeeded Cleveland and Mikey Rikeywas Mikeywaa I1keyWH
was in a fix The boys were on to him but butMikey blltMlitey butMikey
Mikey sailed lIed right through the storm term and andsafely aDdII1tely andsafely
safely anchored a cllored Meantime he again played playedhis playedbls playedhis
his rid tricks and gave away everything he hecould heco hecould
co could ld about Benedict and his III department departmentBenedict departsReRtBenedict departmentBenedict
Benedict discovered the tricks played on onhim onhim onhim
him so that when Cleveland Clevela d and Benedict Benedictcame Benedletame Benedictcame
came in i again Mikey had t finally nally to take UJ UJthe 14t1Ie ttlthe
the woods or fr to ShinshinatU Slllnbl tli as he calls callsthe callsthe callsthe
the Quean City of the West There Perry
Heath editing the Commercial Gazette G < < Z II
recognised re Hd a kindred spirit in in Mikey Mik < y and andentered ludentered andentered
entered his name aa a patriot who had hadfallen hadfaU hadfallen
fallen faU 1i a sacrifice to the Democratic party partyWhen part partWhen partyWhen
When Mr Heath came in with w lh the Hanna HannaMcKlnlry HannaMeJUaley HannaMellinley
McKlnlry crowd Mikey dropped off 011Iret a afreight afreight
Iret freight train near nearWublnlton Washington and culled culledon ca11edon calledon
on Perry He was willing to paint lamp lampposts laldpposta lamppoets
posts carry lunches l to the th clerks or do any anyof IInyof anyof
of the menial work now being performed performedby
by old soldiers such as sweeping floors floorswashing Ooorwaabi floorswashing
washing waabi E soittoons ate etcBut ateBut I IBut
But Perry Heath had hael50usething something in view viewfor viewfor viewfor
for Mikey Mike He n tended his hi protege for 90 9odays 90days 90lIa
days lIa in the mpply division dli lon after firing firingthe firingthe irlngthe
the competent Democratic official who was wasiu WRSIn wasin
In charge This rJd litsgodayracket coday godimcket racket it is needless needlessto needlesto
to state tate was to beat the civil civil8ervice service law as aswill aswill aswill
will be seen farther along alongHaving 1110111 1110111HavhllC alongHaving
Having landed his man Perry notified the theCivil theCivil theCivil
Civil Service Commission that he wanted wantedan
an expert for the head of the supply divis diviasou division division ¬
ion He furnished the commission a list of ofquestions oftuestions ofquestions
questions < < which the applicants for the theposition tbeposition titeposition
position were required to answer At the theend theend theend
end of ninety days Perry made sure that thathis tbathis thathis
his friend Mikey would be able to memor memorize memorize mentortae ¬
ize the answers But however slick Mikey Mikeyis Mik Mikis Mikeyis
is in other things the intricacies of English Englishliterature Englishliterature Englishliterature
literature and language proved too much muchfor muchCor muchfor
for him and on his private examination by byPerry byPerry byPetry
Perry he found to his dismay that Mikey Mikeywould Mlkeywould Mikeywould
would surely fail Hence he had another anotherninetyday anotherninetyday anotherninetyday
ninetyday extension granted him But Buthere Duthere Buthere
here came in a startling discovery Mikey Mikeywas MlkeyWall Mikeywas
was an alien The Civil Service Commis Comtuission Commission Conlin is isslon ¬
sion discovered this fact Then Perry had hadMikey hadMlkey hadMlkey
Mlkey post haste before the courts to de declare deelare declan ¬
clare clan his intentlonsand intentions and Mikey declared declaredof
of course tbat he was after the office of ofSuperintendent ofSuperintendent ofSuperintendent
Superintendent of the Supply Division DivisionIiuaUy Division1lulUy DivisionP1aa11y
IiuaUy the examination took place p1 < < ce and andtwo andtwo andtwo
two at least 18 I1t of the applicants put it all over overMikey overMikey overMikey
Mikey They were however Americans Americansnatives Amerlcal1l1nAtives Americansnadvea
natives and to the manor born and like the theold theold theold
old soldiers 101di n largely handicapped by bythis bytlai bythis
this tlai misfortune Messrs Snyder of the In Interior Interior Intenor ¬
terior Department and Tlbbot of the War WarDepartment WarDepartaueut WarDepartment
Department beat Mikey hands down Tib Tibbotis Tibbut Tibbotia
botis but one of the mOt competent gentle gentlemen feut1elDe gentlemet ¬
met lDe men of his ld etaaa in the service of thegov thegovertmeni the gov goveMetaL goverhuteut
ertmeni He was at the time of the exami examination examiaatloa exatninatior ¬
nation a 1 clerk in the supply division and andfatniHnr andfaiHAt andfamiHar
fatniHnr with the duties of superintendent superintendentThe
The same me may be said h1 of Snyder SnyderPerry SuderPerry SnyderPerry
Perry Heath instructed the commissioners commissionersthat cOlUlU Nloners Nlonersthat
that so many nt marks mark must be allowed Mikey Mikeyfor Mlkeyfor Mikeyfor
for experience expe1tetleoemuclI inasmuch as he bad field fieldthe fIeldthe heldthe
the position for one one hundred and eighty eightydays eightydaya eightydays
days These marks kl added to the answers he hehad hebad hebad
bad memorised e landed Mikey as per er Pern Per s sprogram 11ptOtCfaDl aprogram
program programThen ptOtCfaDlThea programThen
Then began the reign of the foreigner foreignerand toreignerand foreignerand
and the Americans hunted their holes in ingreat infeat ingreat
great feat shape Tlbbot secured a transfer to tosave toeave tosave
save his hi scalp as S did others while some somefell somefen somefell
fell beneath the ax notably au old soldier soldiernamed soldierllatued soldiertrained
named Paul Mr Paul was ill and had haddropsy haddropsy haddropsy
dropsy His physician a reputable practitioner prac practitioner practitioner ¬
titioner to certified cerUiftd but Mikey sent one of ofhi ofhluundcuvner ofhissundtiwner
hi hluundcuvner sundowner clerks and this physician physicianmade physicianmade 1 1made
made the report dictated by Mikey that thatPaul thatPaul thatiaul
Paul was suffering from the effects of ofalcoholism orIltenlIQI1n1 ofalcoholism
alcoholism and he wns WIt promptly die discharged diecbarreti diacharged ¬
charged by this imported Pollock We Wehave Wehae Wehave
have to pause here to allow our indignation indignationto
to cool off offResuming offResumlll offReeumisg
Resuming Resumlll t the narrative the GLOBB will willnow willnow willnow
now direct attention to teeven even a more serious seriousphase Merlouspbue seriousphase
phase of this affair Superintendent Lewis Lewishad Lewishad Lewishad
had himself declared Chairman of tl tlAwarding the theAwardhl theAwarding
Awarding Awardhl Committee of Three members to towhom towhom towhom
whom whom all bids for supplies are submitted submittedaud submittedaUI1 submittedand
and who whore are authorized uth dzed to award contracts contractsfor contractsfor contractsfor
for the same These supplies consist of ofcordage ofcordaKe ofcordage
cordage stationery of all kinds I indt twines and andINK andINK nd ndINK
INK Stick a pin in this item of oCink ink gentle gentlereader geutlereader gentlereader
reader and k keep ep it there until we come cometo cometo cometo
to lL lLThe it itThe itTlte
The postoffice supply division furnish furnishevery furnishevery furnishevery
every postoffice post office in the United States and andits andits andits
its subject kingdoms provinces and prin principalities prlnIdpaUtin prineipalities ¬
cipalities all the twines steel stamps sta stationery stationery stationary ¬
tionery ink and other supplies used in the therespective thereep therespective
respective reep ctive offices o flces Annually the supply supplydivision supplylIivlslon supplydivision
division invites bids for these articles and andthe ald aldthe apdthe
the three members sit in committee of the thewhole thewllole thewhole
whole examine the bids and make the theawards thea theawards
awards awardsThere a awardsThere ward wardTkllre
There is inCincinnati in Cincimiati a firm of which the thebead thebead thehead
bead Mr Ault is a countryman acquaint acquaintance acquaintance acquaintance ¬
ance rend and we believe a relative of ofSuperintendent oCSuperintendent ofSuperintendent
Superintendent Lewis This firm sells ink inkMr inkMr inkMr
Mr Lewis discovered that the ink used by byhis byhis byhis
his predecessor was no good He discovered discov discovered Ucovered ¬
ered too by a process of mathematical mathemnti < ni cal calculation ealculatlon calculatlon ¬
culatlon that some of the th highest bidders bidderswere bidderswere bidderswere
were the lowest Mr Lewis differed fromhits from fromhis fromhis
his American born colleagues on the board boardand boardand boardand
and insisted on awarding contracts to the thethe thethe thethe
the firms he had selected The two twomembers twomea1bers twomembers
members a majority of the board boardmade b boardmade < Mrd Mrdmade
made their report to Mr Heath and tneir tttdirawards tneirawards tbtirawrdt
awards to the lowest low t and best bidders Mr MrLewis MrLewi MrLewis
Lewis made his report also and the awards awardsbe awardsbe awardsbe
be had decided upon Mr Heath strange strangeto
0 1 to say 8 decided in favor of Mr Lewis Lewisand Lewisand Lewisand
and the firms to whom wllo he had awarded the thecontract theeontnHt thecontact
contract Whereat there was scandal But Butthe Butthe Butthe
the scandal was intensified inten shed when Superin Superintendent Superinteadent Superintendent ¬
tendent Lewis had the most important Item Itemin Itemin Itemin
in the schedule of awards withdrawn from fromthe fromthe fromthe
the name and nd bad the power conferred on onhim onblm onhim
him by Mr Heath to go into the open mar market market market ¬
ket and purchase the ink wherever he hepleased heplaand hepleased
pleased Nor Now gentle reader withdraw withdrawthat withdrawthat withdrawthat
that pin and follow Mr Lewis to Cincinnati CincinnatiThe ClnctnnllUTbe CincinnatiThe
The friend and countryman of Mr Lewis Lewisfurnished Iewisrurnlshed Lewisfurnished
furnished the inks Ink I Nayl he not notonty only fur furnished furnllbed furniahed ¬
nished it but everv every pound of ink m 1ft n the thesupply tbeupply thesupply
supply division was ordered destroyed by bySuperintendent bySuperlnte bySuperintendent
Superintendent Superlnte dent Lewis and when the engimeer engi engineer englneer ¬
neer refused to put any more of it in hia hiafurnaces blsrurnaces hiefurnaces
furnaces Lewis had the ink carted out to the thedump thedump timedump
dump in its original vessels and had them thememptied thememptied thememptied
emptied on the public dump dumpHe dumpJIe dumpIfs
He then ordered every postoffice under underthe underthe underthe
the flag of the Republic supplied with the theAult tbeAutt theAult
Ault Wilborg Cincinnati ink and in suchquantities such suchquantities luchquantities
quantities that protests came in from the theunsophisticated thenaophlaUeRted thesnsophisticated
unsophisticated American postmasters aa aato asto aato
to the waste extravagance and unnecessaryquantitinlof unnecessary unnecessaryquantities unn < < es ary aryqatltieliof
quantities qatltieliof of ink with which they were be being being being ¬
ing loaded up These officials never neverdreamed neverdrcalaed neverdreamed
dreamed that they were under the reign of ofMr ofMr
Mr Perry Heaths importation There Therewas Therewas Therewas
was peace in Warsaw for a brief spell but butMr but1r butMr
Mr Lewis rew issued another ukase that no nobody nobody nobody ¬
body who was not a bone fide Manufacturer ntanufueturereuid Manufacturercould JUauUrlictureruld
could uld bidon hid on twine Hence his friend Mr MrHeltu lIlrnellll MrI1elm
Heltu who never had manufactured a apound apound apound
pound of jute twine secured the award awardMr awardMr awardtr
Mr tr Helm Hel was agent of Fuller Co but it itis itis
is Helms Het name ame atone which appears an the theeld theold theold
old sacks Cka This jute which was 6 96 X per perpound perpGluul perpound
pound when Mr Lewis took charge of the theoffice Uteoffice theoffice
office cost the Government of the United UnitedStats UnlwdIta UnitedSeater
Stats Ita togs I per pound last year yearSupplementary year8upp1euienlary yearSuppknentary
Supplementary to the foregoing it is only onlyneeestary onlyto onlyneeeaary
neeestary to state tate tlJatall that all this Is Ia a matter of ofrecord ofrecord ofrecord
record under oath Not only nly what IB re recited recUed recited ¬
cited in the above but other matters equally equallydamning equal equallydamning v vdnsnl
damning dnsnl g AH of which ia in the type typewritten typewriUe typewritten
written copies now in poMesaion peHe alon of Charles CharlesItrnory Charlesmory Charlesemory
emory mory Smith and which Congress Congre was wasabout wa waabHt woeabout
about to ask him to produce Well Wellr WellrPay WllMrPayne Mr MrPayne
Payne Pay e will produce just the same We Wekuow WekJ10W Weknow
know the copies ples are on file and ne man or orofficial oreial orofimal
official eial dare destroy them Mikey Lewis Lewishas Lewisbas Lewisbas
bas no choke as Mr Smith bad b d up to toWednesday toWednoeday toWednesday
Wednesday last Resign Mikey before beforethe beforethe beforethe
the reassembling of Congress COtlltOHllnd and the pro production produqtfon produatlon ¬
duction of that type written rittea record This ia iathe Iethe Isthe
the GtOBB3 ultimatum
1 I
BRIGHT WOMEN WOMEForm WQltIL WOMENForm lr lrForm
Form a Syndicate SynU at to Furnish FurnishRural FurnishRural I IRura1
Rural Weekly Letters XettersTHE LettersTHE LettersTHE
THE SEA SERPENT STORY STORYIn
I
In the Sample Letter oUcr Hunted Butted nII I ed tho thoSjntUcnto thoI thoJndIQnto thuSyndivato
SjntUcnto JndIQnto and tho Liadicu LadtfjThrow Throw Up Vpthe Uptlu Upthe
the SpotiKcThe Kloh Details p ail of or117csdameo ofAlcsdnmca oflJcstlnmea
Alcsdnmca Burke nurkeColbrnd EurkeColbr Colby and Gould GouldIHRQ GouldInge
IHRQ Combined Comblnod Lltcrarr IltcrarYEffort9 Lirorts Efforts to toIrtralyzo toIa toParalyze
Paralyze Ia airzc thn Country O ntr lditlra lditlraMrs Kditora KditoraMrs N ltorA I IMrs
Mrs Mrs Burke Burke the th first lady ever ne admitted admittedto
to the press gallery of ot Congress Mrs MrsColby lIrsColby MrsColby
Colby a literary woman of markedability markedabilityand marhednbtlityand
and Mrs Rosalie O Colliding the well wellknown wellknowu wellknown
known newspaper woman conceived the theidea theidea theIdea
idea of establishing a press bureau blln U all by
themselves in which neither neith r the aid nor northe northe northe
the presence of the male sex weir w t tn tnrequired < > he herequired herequired
required or tolerated And of course tne I Ienterprise Ienterprise Ienterprise
enterprise has lm come to grief and andthe the syndi syndicate syndicate syndiCate ¬
cate has busted And thereby hangs a tale taleand taleand taleand
and a moral which the till CLOne proposes to toexploit toexploit toexploit
exploit in the following truthful narrative narrativeof
of this AdauiletM < l literary Jtden JtdenThe jtdeuThe jidenThe
The three ladies mentioned held several severalpreliminary severalIreliminary severalpreliminary
preliminary meetings to discus t and formulate formu formulate fornmlute ¬
late plans for the proposed pro proposedpreea oset prw bureau bureauOf bureauOC bureauOf
Of course the bureau was Intended to sup supply supply supply ¬
ply the hundreds hand eds of newspapers t1e 1 era throughout through throughout ahroughout ¬
out the laud unrepresented ulftepre enletl at Washington Washingtonwith Wallflingtonwith Washingtonwith
with the newjyaf newlIOf the 11t Natlous capital com comprising COlliprlslng coinprieiug
prising the social 1 political departmental departmentalcongressional deplrtl11entalconrre8sioul departmentalcongressio
congressional congressio rat anti general happenings of ofthis ofthis ofthis
this beautiful city cityWhen dt dtWhtn cityWhen
When by a unanimous vote ote it was decided decidedto dec decl declto
to organise orgau e the bureau bure u the portion each eachlady eachlady eachlady
lady was to bear in the enterprise came up u ufor
for discussion and settlement letde nt To Mrs MrsBurke MrsBurke MrlBurke
Burke was assigned the CwrgWusional CwrgWusionalto
to Mrs Colby the Departmental Departen and nd to toMrs toMrs toMrs
Mrs Goulding the management 1UIU lt1et Mrs MraGoulding MrsGoulding 1111Gouldln
Goulding Gouldln having had experience fit bureau bureauwork bureauYork bureauwork
work being at one titue herein Washington Washingtonthe
the whole thing in a mixett bureau of ofmales ofmalelland ofmales
males malelland and one female herself lter etr she doing doingthe dointtthe doingthe
the correspondence eorre pondence and the male titai members lnembersthe membersthe membersthe
the drinking it was eminently eUlineI proper that thatthe thatthe thatthe
the duty should be assigned tier tt offtecuring
the newspapers desiring Itweklv weekly letters lettersfrom letterArrom lettersfront
from Washington WashingtonBut V shlllgtou shlllgtouBut
But thtre wlUla was a radl radicaldiffetkna radical difference between betweenthe betweonthe betweenthe
the three ladies as II to the form and subject subjectmatter subjectmatter subjectmatter
matter of the proposed letters The inex inexperienced Inexperienced inexperienced ¬
perienced Mrs Colby held Uiofthe news of ofthe orthe ofthe
the departments would be acceptable a c ptable and andinteresting andinteresUng andinteresting
interesting news for the benighted readers readersof readersoC readersof
of the newspapers unrepresented by
lordly lordl correspondents at the Nations Capi Capital Capltat Capitel ¬
tat Sirs A Goulding demurred demurredit1a Ufa in a modest modestway modesLway modestway
way characteristic of Rosalie and news newspaper newspaper newspaper ¬
paper writers in general and held that in interviews Intervlewawith interviews ¬
terviews tervlewawith with noted men meR and piquant piquantcomment piquantcontUlenbl piquantcomments
comment on things tiotin 1I0t n the usual u4 al rut of ofWashington oCWaahington ofWashington
Washington correspondence eorrespaudl ce ft r clipped clippedfrom cUppedfron1 clippedfront
from the Star Sill would be more exciting excitingentertaining excitingentertaining excitingentertaining
entertaining and more thore likelytif tfkelyoCaeeeptance tfkelyoCaeeeptanceShe acceptance acceptanceShe acceptanceShe
She was however voted down by the other othertwo othertwo othertwo
two and instructed to prepare a circular circulartetter circularlelter circularletter
letter to editors give a assume Maine to tl the associa assoeiation association association ¬
tion and hump humphrlHllf herself in securing a client clientage clientage clientage ¬
age among the managing editors of the theUnited theUnited I
United States and its subject st1bJeot4eptl1dlucie st1bJeot4eptl1dlucieNow dependenciesNow dependencies dependenciesNow
Now Rosalie beinsr a 1 hued working prac practical practiual pmcBeal ¬
tical little woman well U and lId thoroughly thoroughlytrained thoroughlytrained thoroughlytrained
trained in newspaper work and up to her herjob herjob herjob
job buekled down aud got off the follow following foHowIng followlug ¬
ing circular letter which was i sent nt out outbroadcast outbroadc outbroadcast
broadcast broadc st the ladies clubbing in to 0 pay the thepostage tIepostage thepostage
postage Hew is the tudetter tudetterNATIONiL theletterNATIONAL letter letterNATIONAL
NATIONAL NBWS SfHiitCATJt S lNblcATB CeRRHoN CeRRHoNDRNCB CeaattSJioNDUNCS CeRkR N NOUNCR
DRNCB Dart No Nar621 6si 6 u HSr N Nr W WP WP WP
P 0 Box 345 STATION STN ION ON G GWAStt GWASttINGTON WattINGToN Watt WAJSHmOTON
INGTON D Ot C wt i rvf rvfAfanaging rf rfiI4IlarillgEdil rpilatwgtug
Afanaging iI4IlarillgEdil Editor RdiiarDneR > Jj JjDEAR j jDEAa <
DEAR SIR StaUncloscd Unclosed please find liuda a sample adaptpleWaeltingtomi sampleWashington lpIe lpIeWashingtoll
Washington letter made upthis up this thlsjrine thlsjrinenecessarily jfrne jfrnenecessarily irmenecessarily
necessarily from recent CoVefutoqiit Coveru1tI tit re reports reporta reports ¬
ports and which is intended intendedto to gives givattrndeft givattrndeftof Idea j1deaof Ideaof
of the service we are in position to furnish furnishYou furnishYou tnlsh tnlshYou
You may print any oral or an of tills Uil will our ourcompliments ourcompliments ourcomphimettts
compliments comphimetttsWe > IWe < v vWe
We have special facilities for furl1 famishing fardsblngtelegraplde famishingtelegraphic thng thngtelegraphic
telegraphic Congressional Congre loflal news special specialreports specialreports apeeialreports
reports interviews with Congressmen and andother Iudother andotter
other prominent persons in thq tit then > public p bUc eye eyedescriptive eyedellCrlptive eyedescriptive
descriptive and illustrated articles short shortstories sbortstories shortstories
stories sketches iu fact anything a news newspaper Dewspaper newspaper ¬
paper could or would or might or should shouldwant shouldwaut shouldwant
want in the line of news new or fiction fictionGive fictionGive fictionGive
Give us a trial At least let us have a aprompt aprompreply aprompkreply
prompreply prompt reply hereto and ad we fcay maybe be of ser service tiervice service ¬
vice to you in some way Our usual charge chargeis
is Sro too per week for a general letter relat relating relating relating ¬
ing to what Congress Congre and the departments departmentsare
are Voing 011l or propose propo e to do and should be beof beoC beof
of special spe ll interest to distant papers not rep represented represented represented ¬
resented at Washington WashingtonTrusting WashingtonTrustinjC WashingtonTrusting
Trusting to have the pleasure of serving servingyou servingvon rving rvingyou
you we ate
Very respectfully respectfullyNATIONAL respectfullyNjTIONA respectfullyNATIONAL
NATIONAL Ifews SYNDICATE SYNDICATEPer SVNDICATBPer SVNDIeNtnPer
Per R IL O Goulding Couldln Manager ManagerDie M ManagerDic nager nagerDie
Die to M Bel BelThe neIThe DeL DeLThe
The cute Rosalie conceals the sex Mlxol of the theNational theNational theNational
National News Syndicate in 1 n the fore foregoing loregoing faregoing
going and leaves the editor under the impression im impression 1mpresslou ¬
pression that the members of the syndicate syndicateare
are of the sex who nightly pose in raglans raglansclip rag1anseUp raglansclip
clip the Star match pennies penni s visit Kernans Ker Kernans Kernan8 ¬
nans drink soda water in a horn and andlimit andlimit andlimit
limit poker bets to two bits bitsThe It ItThe 1 1The
The sample letter enclosed was gotten up
by Mrs Colby and it did the business for forthe rorthe forthe
the syndicate Of the odd reams of ortetters ortetterssent letters letterssent letterssent
sent out Rosalie received three auawersand answers answersand Answersand
and these theeewere were polite declinations to cough coughup coughup coughup
up one dollar or any fraction thereof for forlettets forlettets forletters
lettets based upon the sample The Thesample Thesantp1e Thesample
sample is before us u and ia indeed an exceedingly ex exceedingly exceedingly ¬
ceedingly well composed compilation of ofdepartmental ofdepartnlentBI ofdepartmental
departmental news newASeveral several week weeqqldl oldl Its Itsconcluding ItefOnaludlng Itsconcluding
concluding paragraph the GLOBB believes believesis
is what ruined the enterprise tllrprise Here lIet Hetfi it is isThe isTbe ism ismThe
The sea serpent is no longer to o ue be a re regarded regarded regarded ¬
garded as a myth for be is on record In the theHydrographlc theHydrographic theHydrogrephic
Hydrographic Office vouched for by H H HNeligan HNeligan HNehigan
Neligan third officer of the Trade It ap apblunt appeared appeered
peered to be lie 8111S says about abouta a tO ioO feet long
Its blunt square nose was emitting water waterto waterao waterto
to the height of two or three feet feet ft had hadthree Jladthree hadthree
three distinct distlhctseltof seWof fins fin and a Ulllikeapor Ulllikeaporpoise tat a11lk i lik sf p br brpoise r rpoise
poise This wouldasem weuld weul 1U can to be a fisft ti dg t atory atoryto torv torvbut torvbut
but for the camel Uie i ke humps on th the k of ofthe ofthe
the creature OR whIch Ute officer sating IfVlJ1lng
to stake his hi veracity The monster monst wS8 wfUb wfUbHrver wasabserved eb ebserved
served Hrver in the Gulf Old of Mexico a about b tit 190 190miles 120mil tsomiles
miles mil southeast of the Mississippi rivsf rivsfAnything rNetAnything r rAnything
Anything so ancient as the sea ea serpent serpentchucked alrpenfchucked rpenf rpenfcbacked
chucked at even ltV n aback a bilck woods edfWr trt r as asPXKliK 119PltaH asPRRSR
PXKliK DEPARTMBNT KKW8 NXW was too much milCHThe m muchThe 1 ft ftThe
The ediur felt he was waabelHg being guyed byeomeoriginal by bYIonse bYIonseoriginal jorne jorneoriginal
original cuss who managed somehow todrift to tadrift todrift
drift into Washington and that a zaafewas zaafewasbeing rraaftt Bath r WI WIking s sbeing
being worked to t toeeltrematerialforawwrlte toeeltrematerialforawwrlteup setHrematerialfora t rite riteup dlcup
up of the gullible rural u11 newspaper newspapcjvlaud newspapctXfu newspapctXfulaud TfF TfFlaud
laud snake seaMn Ilef I feeing 11otn over for forQ for19ir ji 1Q4 19ir rl tft tftpaper iJ te temanaging e emenaglug
managing edlt9i Q t ttrIC hepureprceenteilpW1 hepureprceenteilpW1paper Itnrepr IeDtei IeDteipaper
paper in Waahf Woihtngffen ngtba ftuieluded included J1cluded that thattWM thattWMa > tl ttW Wile Wilea S SII
a little too impudent Il1Ipudo t IB I work him wtiftjg wtiftjgisskc wtfUIIDskl wltftsdltsnake
snake Dskl or serpent stories llt rf in a asamplelcUer I sample letter cU cUy
y
and tW he indignantly refused to even nibblethe nibble nibbleth ntbb o oU
th U the bait Rosalie in a letter to the syndi syndicate lyudieate syndieate ¬
eate which for female irony sarcasm and andreproachful andreproacbC1 andreproachful
reproachful emphasis that her practical pr cti IatJ IatJvice ad advice i ivice
vice was Dot followed is a gem in its way j
busted the firm but the GLOBS hopes hopesleft bopf bopfI hopesleft
left I ft the opening for reconcilement between betweenits
its member However to let the reader readerJudge tladoerhl readerjudge <
Judge hl e for himself or herself if this hopo 110 o has hasprobability hilaprobability tinsprobability
probability of reAlization we ttbinlt rnbmitt1oealieA ttbinltRosalies 1I1mltltOMU
ltOMU Rosalies letter to the president pr ldent of tile Na National Natfol1tl Natlonal ¬
tional News N Syndicate Here it in inWASHINGTON IIIWA isWASIIINOTON
WASHINGTON WA WASIIINOTON UNGTON D C Dc 1 71901 71901MY ryot ryotMv lOt lOtIv
Mv Iv DRAR Mao COLBY COLBYThe COLDYrhe CornvrThe
The Tribune came to hand 0 K and the thearticle theartl theartic1
artl article looks welt in print Sorry to my 8 < < Y I Ihave IlIave IHave
have not yet had the pleasure of seeing itin it itin ItIn
in print elsewhere to date and more m re sorry sorryto 80rr 80rrto sorrytoadvlae
to toadvlae advise that out of the trial papers papers I Ihave 1have Ihave
have received replies from but three and andthese andthese andthese
these are negative in character that is to tosay tosay tosay
say they state that contracts for a similar similarserviceTwere similarservice I
serviceTwere service were made early ellrlyiu in the fall which whichI
I know of course and that they cannot use usethe usetI usethemattcr I
tI themattcr the en1I1ttcr matter Inclosed I bet beg to hand you a acopy acopy acopy
copy of f the letter sent together with n 1 bit bitof bitof bitof
of matter ntatter from the departments in the way wayof w1 w1of wayof
of of advance sheets Will also send you copy copyof copyor cony conyof
of an Iniuterview interview I am sending out today fadayand todayand Codayand
and which it is my belief bellerwill will be successful successfulThe SUCCe5CnlThe successfulThe
The modest venture in syndicating syndicatingwe syndicatingwecould syndicatingwecould we wecould
could not strictly speaking call the galley galleyproofs gallcyproofs galleyproofs
proofs news newsha hau demonstrated moreclearly more moreclearly
I
clearly than ever that my view Jew of the themai theIIIRII thematte
mai matte t is a II practical one if not a wise one onei
i that newspapers new pnper wilt not pa lAt for what whattli whattll whattheyciiaget
tli theyciiaget ycaii y calL sr t thenmsetvestltat themselves that department departmentrr departmentrlfJlJlts departmentreports
rr reports pot is are accessible to t every editor with withthe withthe withtlic
the energy nttd postage o e sufficient to ask for forthem Corthem forthem
them that while most smaller papers do donot douot donot
not know this till fact or do not act upon it itwhile itwhUe itwhile
while knowing it they tb y prefer wideawake wideawakelive wldeavakelive wideawakelive
live news of ever so Ie unimportant a char character cbarter character
acter ter to wise weighty and thoughtful thoughtfulcompilation thQurhttulcou1piationa thoughtfulcontptlatiota
compilation from reports or general sub aubfeet subjects Bubject ¬
jects feet under the public ee eye efe I do not mean meanthin U1ltantl1ll1 meanthis
thin as a criticism of your contributions not notin notIII notin
in the least for when you read theraauu theraauuscript themauurapt themanuacnpt
script rapt to me I agreed honestly hone Uy that most of ofthe oCt4e ofthe
the matter ought to be saleable eable and cer certainly certalnly curtainly ¬
tainly was readable In this point how however however however ¬
ever is just where the ordinary correspon correspondent correspondent correspondent ¬
dent makes a 1 mistake mistakehe he insists on being beingthe beingtbe beingthe
the editor the censor of news whereas the thepaper thepaper thepapers
paper want facts facts fact facts only which whichthey whichthey whichthey
they can cull compile arrange and edit to tosuit tosuit tosuit
suit their own peculiar and generally supposed sup supposed supposed
posed superior ideas Idasand and the needs of ohhelr ohhelrindividual their theirindividual theirindividual
individual publications publicationsI
I have in n course of preparation today an anInterview anIntervieW anInterview
Interview with a painter from Belgium Belgiumwho Belgiumwho Belgiumwho
who is a citizen of this Ull country now and andwhose andwhoaelIame andwhose
whose whoaelIame name is known to connoisseurs of ofart oCart ofart
art on onboth both sides of the Atlantic During Durttigthe Duringthe Dl1tlugtile
the course of conversation last Sunday Sundaynight SUlldaynight Sundaynight
night when I had the pleasure Il aure of a call callfrom callfrom callfrom
from this gentleman he took occasion to todiscuss todlscuslt todiscuss
discuss the findings of the Schley Court of ofInquiry oCInquiry ofInquiry
Inquiry in a truly artistic manner He did didnot didnot didnot
not know that he was talking for publica publication publication publication ¬
tion nor had I then the least idea of report reporting reportIng reporting ¬
ing his conversation but he is a very good goodfriend goodfriend goodfriend
friend and I know will not only pardon the theliberty theliberty theliberty
liberty but will be pleased with the evident evi evident evideat
dent appr elation of his views by my putting put putting pulHug ¬
ting them on paper paperthey they may mayneer never get in inpaper illpaperbut inpaperbut
paper paperbut but I believe they tile will This interview inter interview Interview ¬
view will be offered to the SUNDAY SUNDAyGLOBR SUNDAyGLOBRand GLOBB GLOBBand CLOnnand
and New York Journal OtlrH J I am welt weltacquainted weltaequainted weltacquainted
acquainted with the management tIlRnagementor of the theowr theutH4l
owr utH4l Bureau in this city who haSruadi haSruadime haa bras mad madme made mademe
me a standing offer to buy anything that thatI thatbring
I bring which by any possibility he can canuse canuse canuse
use In fact he was wa a reporter on the Wash Washington Waahlugton Washbngton ¬
ington nines when J I was a space writer writerfor writerfor writerfor
for the same sheet sheetDo IheetDo sheetDo
Do not get discouraged The The road I Illave IllavetraYeled hav havtraveled have havetraveled
traveled in reaching my present modest modestplace modestp1ace modestplace
place in newspaperdom newspapef bm has been hardstony hardstonysttep hardslonysteep ltardstonysteep
steep and well nigh impossible impo lble of ascent ascentat IlIcentat ascentat
at times but I have managed to get a foot foothold foothold foottold ¬
hold and by the Eternal Pates I mean to tostand tostand tostand
stand pat until I lam am tto longer able to hold holdmy holdnly holdmy
my own or until I succeed in creating an anown anown anown
own which others will not only help me meto meta tueto
to hold but will also want to take ta talSe hold of ofOthers ofOthers ofOthers
Others have done this thiswllynot why wliynot not I 1 Suoh is ismy ismy ismy
my thought when tempted to discourage discouragement discouragement discouragewent ¬
ment and since Ince it has helped me I pass it iton itou iton
on for what it is worth wo th somewhat m in the thespirit thespirit thespirit
spirit of those whose doctrine is to lend a aa aa aa
a hand handWith handWltb handWith
With many man and heartfelt wishes for f9r your yoursuccess yoursucCCII yoursuccess
success and with the compliments t of > f the theseason thesason theseason
season I beg to remain remainMost remainMostlncerely remainMostaincerely
Most Mostlncerely sincerely your friend friendROSALIA friel1dROSALIM friendROSAUW
ROSALIA 0 GOULDtNG GOULDINoDicL GOULD GOULDtNGDiet i MO MODiet
Diet to SKLF SKLFThe S SRLPThe LF LFThe
The Interview to which Mrs Goulding Gouldingrefers Gouldingrefers ulding uldingrefers
refers appears in InUtls this issue of the GLOBU GLOBUand GLOIUand GLonaand
and has been gladly given iyen pay paytlMe apace We Wehope Wehope Wehope
hope the syndicate will reorganize and andif andif andif
if it eliminates sea serpent stories and re rehashed reo reobubed rehashed ¬
hashed department news the probabilities probabilitiesare
are that a paying yitlg clientage will be securedamong secured securedamong lecuredamong
among the live newspapers unrepresented unrepresentedby unrepre eated eatedby
by lordly 10rdl Has at the Nations Capital CapitalIjvceum CapitalI Capitalhyoeutn
Ijvceum I To um Theater TheaterThe ThoaterThe TheatorThe
The attraction at Kernans Keruan 8 Iyceum LyceumChristmas IyceumChritmas IyceumChristmas
Christmas week is one that will be sure to toplease topleaae toplease
please both young youn and old That favorite favoritecomedian favorltecomedian favoritecomedian
comedian AI Reeves with jiis big famous famouscompany ram0l18company famouscompany
company of burlesquers with new and andcatchy nnd08tchy andcatchy
catchy music funny situations and dances dancesnew dancesnew dancesnew
new and andtuagnificent magnificent scenery handsome handsomewomen bandlomew handsomewomen
women w men gorgeous wardrobe and grand grandelectrical Ilmndelectrieal grandelectrical
electrical effects Mr Reeves stands sUJIdawlth sUJIdawlthout with without without ¬
out a peer in his line and says that the theshow theshow theshow
show is laughter from start to finish The Theshow Thesbow Theshow
show is composed of a chorus of thirty thirtywomen thirtywomen thirtywomen
women who whoare arc shapely and beautiful and andall andal1 andall
all of whom possess strong voices There Thereia Thereis
ia i a very amusing satire that opens the he per performance performance performance ¬
formance entitled The Reception of Count CountOFudge CountOFudge CountOPudge
OFudge Then follows an olio of upto uptodate uptodate uptodute
date specialties with such wellknown peo people people people ¬
ple as McCabe Sabine and Mlle Vera in inan inan inan
an act entitled The Irish Contractors and andthe andthe andthe
the Typewriter Hoey and Lee who style stylethemselves IItylethemselves stylethemselves
themselves The Two Real Hebrews Hebrewscomedians Hebrewscomedians Hebrewscomedians
comedians and parody singers Rossley and andRostelle andR andRostelle
Rostelle R 9telle in A Widows Courtship Cliff CliffGordon ChIIGordon CliffGordon
Gordon the German Alderman Dora Den Denton Denton Denton
ton and Company introducing Intr duoilli beautiful beautifulliving beautifulUvlng beautifulliving
living pictures and last but not i lotasl osi AlRekvee Al AlReaves AIReevee
Reaves the worlds champion ban banjoist bilnjolltjconcluding banjoistconcluding joist
with an uptodate burletta burlettaen burlettaentitled burlettaentitled en entitled ¬
titled A ANliltt Night atNarragansett at Pier intro introducing introdueing introducing ¬
ducing a chorus of fifty vales valesThe vole voleThe voicesThe
The original moving pioturas pieturbof of the recent recentellrieeRublln
ellrieeRublln fight have been engaged as asa asa
special feature and will prove unusually unusuallyinteresting unueual1yilteresUng unusuallyinteresting
interesting interestingCOre COre COreBy
Corrootl Correction CorrectionBy n nBy
By an error of the printer the advertise advertisement advertiaement ¬
ment of the Texas Mexico and Louisiana LouisianaOil IoI1I LouleianaOil ana anaOil
Oil Company on our third page Qge is inserted insertedin
in this issue uue The salAadvertiseraentoffera salAadvertiseraentofferathe lt llItertfaementoflCN llItertfaementoflCNthe
stock of the company omp nv at 30 cants par tier tiersbare
The stock of artbe the company has been beenadvanced beenadvanced
to 100 per er share and special specialnotice specialnotice
of the same was published in i last lastS1nday lastSpndaya
GLOn Owns The Tht r j blunder of the theprinter theprinter
In again agall1lnser1ln inserting r the he advertisement adverUem advertisementwill nt ntwill
therefore be understood ul1denato d especially asthe as asthe
company eomp ny advertises on our eighth page pageIn pagein
this issue its present pro cnt status iltaLuland and price pl + ce of olBtock
F
The Busy Corner Market Space SpaceS SpaceSs
5 Ss KANN SONS CO CONews COi CONews CONews
i
News From Our Shoe Center CenterThe I IThe
The home where women misses am aad nd children arc served sorve with the theboat thebest theheat
boat footwear fOtWe 1 in inWa Washington hiu ton and whore they the can shop with privnoy privnoyThe privROYh privnoyTito
The h snow now may mnoome come aiul if it dpos we are prepared with withsoo withgoo
s
goo cuscs c eitses 1ses of rubbers suitable for women women misses and children they are the thsbest tll1 tll1beet thebest
best quality they are the guaranteed kind and come in every size and nnd width wldlhr wldlhrstead widthfu widthfustead ftt fttstead
stead stead of 50 cents we w are going to offer them at 29 centsOur cents centsOur cen j jOnr
Our Kolonial shoe for women are are the acknowledged peers of anyshoe anyshoesold anyshoesoldfilrs sold soldfor soldforgoo
for filrs forgoo 500 o in this city or elsewhere We haveadded many new styles to the already alreadygreat alreadygr alreadygreat
great gr nt showing and al d can truthfully state that they are perfect in every very detail 3 3distinct 32 32dtstfnct 3adfstlnct
distinct styles are hcre1111 here all sizes all leathers from the smart street shoe to the thes tbeel1 thedwell
s dwell ell dress shape shaper shapeientember remember n1en1ber not 500 but 3soWe 350 150W v vWe
We W have roundedtup r unded up 800 pairs of loo oo shoes including the celebrated Idealkids Ideal Idealkd Idealkld1
kd kld1 kids patent tent enamel etllU1lel ena iel box calf and Twentieth Century kid skins skinsail all sizes and all allshnpesttthe all111tpti allshspeastlie
shnpesttthe 111tpti Ilhe 4 4TOo 1 kind for 240 240Kamis 240Kanlt 240Kauitte
Kamis Kanlt jJ 195 Special Speclalthis this fornouh shoe for women has proven a winner winnerThe winnerrhco winnerTune
The demand has increased to such a height that we are delightfully pleased pleasedGood plcasedGood pleasedGood
Good honest values combined with style stlefit fit fit and quality they are made in all allleathers allleathers allleathers
leathers conic in It all sizes shapes and weights weithtsrcmembjir remember not 3oosbut 3o 3oo but 195 195XVe r95We m95We
We are showing 18 kinds of womens shoeb made of soft pliant kid patent patentleather patentleatber patentleather
leather and box calf with either kid or cloth tops heavy extension and medium mediumsoles mediumsoles mediuntsoles
soles none better bett r at aoo which htch we are selling selllnlfnt at 145 145aoar <
4000 pairs of childrens wnrm stout shoe Blade lndeot of kid and calf skin sldttallo sldttallopatent skinalsopatent also alsopatent
patent leather in all sizes and widths wfdthsthe the price 95 cents centsThis cents1lIiB centsThis
This department is located oh on the secondJlooradjofl1inlr second fiodr adjoining the Millinery parlors parlorsS parlorsS parlorsr parlorsS
r
S KANN J < ANN SONS CO Market lVlarketSpace lVlarketSpaceMILLIONS Space SpaceMILLIONS SpaceMILLIONS
MILLIONS OF DOLLARS DOLLARSIN
IN INHandling INHandling INHanding
Handling Texas Oil OilnDKolutely OilTHE OilTILE
THE TEXAS LOUISIANA AND MEXICO OIL COMPANY COMPANYRbloolutely COMPANYabsolutely
absolutely controls the only P Pdeuled tenttd Machine ltIRcl lulI and Chemical Process PrOC SS for forremoving forremovln t tremoving
removing removln Asphalt aud Sulphur Sqlpl Ur from from oil n at small cost costStorage costStorRie T TStorage
Storage tanks machines nnil everything complete to handle two twothousand tw twthousaucl twothousand
thousand barrels barre per day wilt cost fifty tythouanll thousand dollars dollarsWe donarsWe dolliirsWe
We can contract for the oil at 10 locantll c ctitB uta per p r barrel iu Texes
3000 carrels at 10 cents c nt8F i 200 bo boRefining doRefining o oRefining
Refining same Y > 20000 20000Incidentals 200 00 00IucfdentBls 00Incidentals
Incidentals > d i 20000 20000Results zoo OCt OCtResults o0 o0Results
Results
400 barrels arre1HLI1 Lubricating Jrlcatillx Oil OUt fr f o b pt works or n 20 ji6S 1630 168o < 00 ooaooharrels
200 aooharrels barrels AspliHltuni f o b at works II H 4 20 841 84000 840 00
1360 barrels Gas Oil f o obatworks b at works j I 147 47 190 ImJo 1999 20
40 barrels Loss LossDaily LQS LQSni1y LossDaily
Daily profits 3919 20 21 2145t9
4519 4 19 20 2 4Ui9 4 4t9 19 20 20Stock 20Stock 20Stock
Stock in this company will be worth many times par when whet our first firstplant firstplant firstplant
plant is running runningSHARES rutluinfSHARES runningSHARES
SHARES AT ATI EAQH EAQHand EACH EACHnel
and nel foe a short time will be sold at II i Subject to tolulvapce advance without withoutnotice withoutnotice p pnotice
notice noticeA
A I T4THO THO THOMAS VI tAS AS Pr President ideut J Q SULLIVAN Treasurer TreasurerROOMS Treasurer f fROOMS t tROOMS
ROOMS 306 TO 309 BOND BUILDING WASHINGTON 0 C
Chases Grand Opera House HouseThe lI houseThe
The bill arranged by Mr Chase for tile tilepatronage tIlCOpttronage thepatronage
patronage of his clientele on Christmas Christmasweek Chrilltmasweek Ch ietmas ietmasweek
week is one in keeping with the season seasonTt lIeasonTt seasonIt
Tt is dominated by comedy and the auditor auditorwill auditorwl11 auditorwill
will add to his store of Christmas good feel feeling feelillg feelhug ¬
hug by seeing see ug it It At its head by right of ofconquest ofCOnquellt ofconquest
conquest in vaudeville V udeville and other lines of ofstage oCIItagll ofstage
stage endeavor will be May Bdouin daugh daugliter daughter daughter ¬
ter of Of the celebrated English comedian comedianWillie comedianWiUle comedianWillie
Willie Edouin Miss Hdouin came over to tothis tothlll tothis
this country with her father in the original originalFlorodora originalFlorodora originalPlorodors
Florodora company and continued to be bethe betbe11eadlnc betliai
the tbe11eadlnc tliai leading comedienne of that piece pieceuntil pieceuuut pieceuntil
until she woe tempted away by bythe the alluring alluringmonetary al1uriugmonetary alluringmonetary
monetary advantages offered in vaudeville vaudevilleShe vAullevl11eSbe vaudevilleSite
She Will be seen in conjunction conj unctioll with withFred withPred
Fred Edwards in Edmund Days latest latestvaudeville latestnudevil1e latestvaudeville
vaudeville comedy All in the Family FamilyShe FamilyShe FamilyShe
She assumes five distinct characters characterstherein charact characttherein characterstherein
therein and has met with much succcess succcessA suceeessA sueccessA
A novelty new to Washington will be beSugiuiotos beSugimotos beSugimotos
Sugimotos Royal Japanese troupe troupe who whowill whowl11 whowill
will perform feats of acrobatics juggling jugglingand Jugglingnnd juggling jugglingand
and balancing An Albino Japanese girl isa is isa Isa
a member of the troupe Another act of ofthe orthe ofthe
the headline class will be the Smedley SmedleySketch SmedleySketch SmedleySketch
Sketch Club in an offering affording oppor opportunity oppor opportunity opportunity ¬
tunity for the display of the talents of the thechild theebUd thechild
child actors Hilts and Edwin Smedley SmedleyOthers Snl dley dleythers
Others Others thers to appear are Di Dnvy D Vy y Sawtelle and andJordan andDuffy andDuffy
Duffy Florence Bindlev LozeUe Burt DurtJordan BurtJordan
Jordan and Rosa Crouch In all the pro program proKralll progrant ¬
gram comprises nine acceptable acts As Asusual Aiusual Asusual
usual on holidays there will be no advance advancein
in Chase orices on Christmas day dayFinest da daCHA dayCHASES
=
CHA CHASES ESJ WEEK EEK DEC DECI23 DECI23Pinest 2 2IfiulIBt
Finest Holiday Program Pr rmm aver Preeented PresentedMERRIMENT PreeentednERRIMENT PreeentedMERRIMENT
MERRIMENT JOLLITY COMEDY COMEDYNothing cOJmmvNoUllng COMEDYNothing
Nothing to Think of ofSlmp1y Simply to Laugh at atPrincipal atPrincipal atirlncipal
Principal Comedienne Com dienne of the theMAY tlieOriginal theOrlilnal theOri
Ori Original inal Florodora CompanyMAY Company CompanyrolA
MAY rolA Y ftD ftDPrincipal 1DcUIN IDOUIN DOUIN Assisted Assistedby Aaaillteelby Assistedby
by FRBD FR D EDWARDS JJDWARDSin UDW ARDS ARDSIn
in Iidw Bduiund Days Latest Comedy Success SuccessALL SucceuALL
IidwALL THE PAMILYSuccess PAMILYSuccessIntroducing
ALL IN THB FAMILY FAMILYIntroducing FAMILYIntroducing
Introducing Miss Hdouins famous song
Laughter LaughterPRINCB taughterPRINCB LaughterPRINCE
PRINCB SOQIMOTOS ROYAL ROYALJapanese ROYALJapanese ROYALJapanese
Japanese Troupe of Acrobats AcrobatsJugglers Acrobatsugglers AcrobateJugglers
Jugglers and EqutlibristsThe Bqullibrista BqullibristaThe
The Sut Smdley dley Sketch Club ClubIncluding ClubIneludiui ClubIncluding
Including Americas AmerimsGreatest Greatest Child Artiste ArtisteLITTLB ArtisteLITTlI ArtistsLITTLE
LITTLE KLWS and EDWIN nWIN SMJtDLBY SMJtDLBYIn
In the Comedy Drama DramaTHB DmauaTUn DramaTIIf
THB LITTLB MOTHJBR MOTHJBRFLORBNCB lIOTIiBRpIORUNCa MOTRERPLORUNCU
FLORBNCB BINDLBY BINDLBYVersatile BINDtlJYVersatile BINDLIh1YVersatile
Versatile Artist ArtistLOZBLLB ArtfatIOZULLU ArtistLOZELLE
LOZBLLB LOZBLLBSensational IOZULLUSelllMtloJJ41 LOZELLESensational
Sensational Midair Evolutions EvolutionsBurd iivalutloni iivalutloniBurd IvolutionlBurd
Burd Rosa RotaJORDON RoHJORDON RosaJORUON
JORDON AND CROUCH CROUCHNovelty CROUCHN CROUCHNovelly
Novelty N velt and Nonsense NonsenseThe NonslOneeTJle NonsenseThe
The Two Has Becne BecneTALtfOT Deenn DeennTALIfOT BeensTALTlOT
TALtfOT AND DAVIDSON DAVIDSONCharacter DAVIDSONChnracte DAVIDSONCharacter
Character Singing Slndn Comedians ComediansDUFFY ComediansDUIIFY ComediansDUPPY
DUFFY SAWTBLLB AWTIILI4I AND DUFFY DUPPYIntroducing DUFFYitroducing DtJPlVIntroducingMaster
Introducing IntroducingMaster Introducing Master Masterfufythegreatestchild Masterfufythegreatestchildcomedian Duffy the greatest gr C18t chil chilcomedian child childcomedian childuomedtanQn
comedian uomedtanQn on the American stage stageIntroducing stageDaily stageIShcly tnge tngeI1
Daily I1 nJl Matinees ajK cants cantsThe qanttlICvenlng centsEvenings
Evenings and q cents centsThe centsThe
The Only Onl OnlyThcattr Theater in t Washington Was Ifngtun that do doItot dot dotnot doe doenot
not advance ad anlOe prices on Christmas Day
Seats Seat now npw on sale Ile
I
ANNOUNCEMENT ANNOUNCEMENTWe ANNOUNCEMENT ANNOUNCEMENTWe
We would like lke to call cal the attention atelltlon of the thepublic thepublic r
public publc to KBETOL KOFF OlF DHOPS lOPS it itis i t
is il the only olly Koff drop on the market that thatwill thatwill i iwi
will wi stop acute cases Cses of cold They are aregood ar I Iood lgood
good ood for public speakers and singers They Theyalso Tbeyaillo Theyalso
also aid digestion and sharpen the appetite appetiteThey appetiteThey t tThey
They contain no opiates We have havesold sold over over8oooo I
80000 80 boxes throughout the country countr and andhave andhave andhave
have received thousands thousnd of testimonials as asto a asto
to their ability abity If I you have a bad bd cold or orlay orlay orlay
lay awake nights Koffing Kofng dont do without withouta
a box bo of the tie KBETOfc KOPF ItOFF DROPS DROPSFor DOPSFor DROPSFor
For sale at all the tlo leading druggists druggi in the thecity thecity
city The following fohlowingare are a list lst of some sme of the thedruggists tbedrlgits thedruggists 1
druggists drlgits now selling llelng the famous KRBTOL KRBTOLREMEDIES KRUTOLREMUDR KRRTOLREMEDIES
REMEDIES REMEDIESDr REMUDR
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King Smith smith mih Qth 9th and U its n I wW w wW wW
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Howard Howrd Ratcliff Rtc Ratcljfi I nth 1th and B sts n e eC eC eC
C I 1 Griffith Grifth 700 70 H st et n e eFamous eFamOlS eFaII1OIS
Famous FamOlS Kretol Series Series437TKNTII Readies427TICI
427TICI 437TKNTII 127 TENTH TiI STREET NORTHWEST NORTHWESTJOHN NO NORTHWESTJOHN IWEST
il ilJOHNSIMMONS
JOHN JOHNSIMMONS SIMMONS SIMMONSSale SIMMONSSale 1 1SaIo
Sale an and Excianie Exchan Stables StalkFirstclass StablesFirstclass I IFlrtctsll
Flrtctsll Firstclass Drivingand DrivingandWorkinglorses DrivingandWorkinglorsesAways VerkingHprses VerkingHprsesAlways VorklnrHorsea VorklnrHorseaAws
Hand HandStack HandStock
Always Aws on Hane HaneStock
Stock Guaranteed Guamlteed as Represented or orMoney or1Ione1 orMoney
Money 1Ione1 Refunded ReCunedIQ
1004 IQ Ohio Avenue Avnue Near Ncr Corner isth Street StreetPhone StreetPhone StreetPhone
Phone 21192 21192WASHINGTON 2192 2192W attgrWASHINGTON
WASHINGTON W AlNGTON D C CKERNANS c cKERNANS CKERNAN
KERNANS I UAty UAtylve
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lve Jvo ZOaniBOc ZOaniBOcTelephone BIlllOc BIlllOcTelephone and b bTelephone
Telephone Main
2345 2345AL 234SAL
AL RBmVBS R3DVU 1AMOUS FAMOU lAMOUS 23S BIO mGco mGcoIntoducing B1GCOIntroducing CO COIntroducing
Introducing Intoducing
The Original Moving Pictures Pcture of the theJEFFRIESRUHLIN ti thatJEFFRIES
JEFFRIESRUHLIN JEFF JEFFRIES Olgnal IESRUHLN RUHLIN FIGHT FIGHTOnly FIGHTOnly FIGHTOnly 1
Only Bona Fide PideReproductionoftlris Reproduction Reproductlonofthfe of this Fight FightNeat FightNext FightNext
Next Week WeekAl WeekSAM BAM DEVBRE CO r

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