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HAWAII progress1, HOLOMUA.
'HZ
TQe X-tlfe of tie ' Land Is IS staTolisiied. in. Biglltso,usrLss.,
4
Vol. L No. 24.
HONOLULU. SATURDAY, OCTOBER 14, 1S93.
Per Month 50 Cts.
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T DENTIST,
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-OR-
Once upon a time in the long
agor-at least that is the way all
fairy ttles begin, and as this is a
fairy tale, we suppose it must
begin that way, although, we are
not sure of the chronological ac
curacy of the statement there
was an Eastern city of groat
renown in the production of sugar,
mosquitoes, and rogues. Now
in this city there dwelt two war
ring sects variously described as
the Mish Nayree3 and the Anti
Mish Nayrees. At the time, our
tale begins the Mish Nayrees,
otherwise, Beni Stevens or sons
of well Mish Nayrees had
their foes the Anti Mish Nayrees
by means of foreign assistance
wrested the power from, and
governed their foes with a heavy
hand that is heavy with gold
wrung from the plundered tax
payers who were all of the Anti
Mish Nayree sect, and objected
strongly to thoir hard-earned
money going into the ponche3
and stomachs of the chief . saints
of the Mish Nayrees and their
; foroign mercenaries. But
this is by the way. Now in the
former days when the Mish Nay
rees wore out of power and place,
their scrib&s and pharisecs but
especially their scribos had rail
ed and wept exceedingly sore,
and declared that tho Grand
Mufti of the police was a rogue,
aud his department a don of
thieves and robbers, and that it
was a scandal to all good religion
and government, and when by
fraud and violence the' had sne
ceeded in ousting the Anti Mish
Nayreas their scribes publicly
rejoiced and wrote long articles
to sliow that now tho blessing of
Heaven bad descended on the
nation, and that the Grand Mnfti
and the police department woald
be pure as thev Angels of God
also much moro frequently visible
than they when on duty. But
strange as it may seem tho first
two Grand Muftis proved them
selves so nnfitted for association
with the Chief Pharisees of the
Mish Nayrees that they retired
speedily and joined the ranks of
the Anti-Mish Nayrees, and the
scribes once more rejoiced and
howled, and wrote long screeds
to prove that there was "but one
TV. O. S. (Wily old scoundrel)
and E-G.H. (ever green humbug)
was his prophet, and the only
one he&venborn Grand Mufti in
th Nation. For had ho not
gained much shskelsaRd- praise
by succeeding in his own province
in exterminating the IiqnortratHc
by driving fro as one district to
asother and back sgaia, often
e&oagjh" k bo able to give -higk-rewards
to hk informers and
spies, susd yeti tks sa&saer of
tfee jLwi ' jftayrees wita every
peesBiaxily profitable vica- sot
(ketroy it so tierly-Uut it woald
ift 'losger HmplQagra iaA
ckiiyiBg witiP-ii, wlsihl -at the
tlnw drxwiag is the nui
Miih Nayrees manner
good fat
it, and
And the
pay for suppressing
it was done.
new ttrand Aluui whose
locks were of crimson
hue in-
caruadino mingled with
tho
white of a purity which had uot
been sullied "by contact with
the rogues and thieves, liars and
swindlers, opium-boodlers aud
extortioners, bribe-takers and
ex-convicts with whom ho sur.
rounded himself as his assistants,
said to himself now shall wo
have that pure and holy city the
Mish Nayroos desire this to bo.
No scribe shall ever bo able to
scandalize this departmenf und
straightway his subordinates
robbed the opium of tho govern
ment stored in a strong room in
his office under his nose. Then
held ho his hands in horror and
said, "Be chesm? on my head be
ill I will guard this opium no
more. If tho anti-Mish Nayreo
Grand Mufti could do it for two
years all right. It is not tho
business of tho polico to guard
anythiag. I won't. My followers
are too smart." So tho remaind
er was removed to another placo
where neither thieves nor police
men break in and steal, but only
Custom officers. And straight
way tho scribes of the Mish
Nayree party wrote long and
tediously to prove, .that these.
sons of guns of policemou (on
whose heads bo dirt,) who stole
the opium wore anti-Mish Nayree
emissaries in disguiso aud plot
ted this to bring disgrace on
tho holy and pnre administra
tion of tho Mish Nayrees. Aud
so tho tale wont on. Tho Mish
Nayreo police department wont
on bribes were taken, moro wero
extorted, criminals wero seldom
detected or caught, when detocted
and if caught they generally
escaped from custody,
women wero decoyed into grat:
fying the passions of policouien
and then arrested for so doing,
fAlsa nlots wore hatched and in
nocent men imprisoned.
And the abottors and actors' in
these strange things wero upheld
by the Mish Nayreo Grand Mufti,
and weie not dismissed in ignom
iny, but if public opinion was too
strong, and the act too glaring.
the offender was noi pros a .so as
not to cause scandal by any un
due public revelations. And
Mish Nayrees and Anti Mish
Nayrees alike held up their
hands in awo and said, "truly
great is W. 0. S. and E. G. S.
is his prophet indeed. Wonder
ful indeed are their ways, and
great is the renown they bring to
the Mish Nayrees and this
nation. How long? O Lord!
how longf
Xet, one day to this city there
arrived a mighty vessel with
much wealth and produce of
other nations to barter for the
sagar aad aiosquitoee aad rogues,
which were the prodece of the'
nation. And on board, of her
there abode one skilled ia wetal
sad Bsachiaerr, and fie bad Vita
hba sKisdry &se awtal boles of
braes (like aaio thai ia the
cheeks o the great Vf O. S. a ad
km prophet) to ' the amaiber of
I CoHtiased oa foarth pg.)
s
.-v .
