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THURSDAY, APRIL 8, 1885.
Kk (Julbiii leu from San Francisco
Stnir 'Mokohl from Windward VoiU
S S Mariposa from San Francisco
Stmr Jas M.ikeo from Kapaa
Apt 11 S
Sehr ITnleakiilii for Pepcekco
Stmr Jas Mnkcc for Kapaa
Stinr Moknlil for Windward Port
VESSELS IN PORT.
Steam Ilktne Morning Star, Bray
Ship Impcrator. Unix
Get bk-Mathllde, Kreiizlen
Sclir Eva, Wlkman
S S Maripo?a, llaywuul
AVli Alliance. Mclvcnna
l'or llamakua per l.elina. Apiil"
Mrs llilekwnod and two ehlldicn. K A
Ualtesbo and 15 deck.
For Wabiawa, Koloa, Waiinea. Xa
willwlli and Kckaha per Planter. Apiil
7 Miss Loula Wllhclm, MUsE Rice,
Miss Ekclaiki, Miss L Richards.
For Wind ward Poits per Kinau. April
7 Alex Young, Sr. 11 C Austin, A XV
Kichardou. Hon Geo E Richardson,
Mrs E Batchclor, II X Castle. Jr, E M
Walsb, .S Alnina, Y Alan, XV Stclllng.
From Kapaa per Jay Makee, April S
Mi- and Mrs J Howie and child and 20
From San Francisco per Mariposa,
Apiil S Miss Minnie Young. L C Abies
and wife. A Elder-', .1 11 Blight and
wife. .1 T Ward. Count Morebutter, Ii
V E Ittiuan, Mm ,1 11 Maynard, Mis II
Houston, Francis Malcolm. Willie Sims,
'A II Smith, Miss V E Dnrgic, Win
Ilannlvar. W li Lewis, A C I'alfry, Ex
Senator Booth, L S Adams. Allied
Wills, Capt A Mey, E T Stetson and
wife, .1 It Morrison and wife, Mrs E O
Small, .T 1 Kutledge, Geo Torbert, .1 B
V Davis, S Eh'rlieh, Mi's Bergh, XV O
Smith. II C Coxe, Bobt Laing and wife,
XV II Pedlar, XV A William, 1!GG Chi
nese and S Europeans in steerage.
From San Francisco per Caibarien,
April 8 Mrs C! XV Clark, Mr G It Wood.
Stmr Jas Makec brought l.'AVi bag of
sugar. She sails to-morrow evening at
5 o'clock for Kapaa.
The steamers XV G Hall and Iwalaui
are duo here to-morrow.
Ktmr Mokolii brought !U5 bag- of
sugar, 11 head of cattle. -1 calve. S."i
heop, 4 lambs, 'J hore, fl Hides and :i
pig1.. She sails to-morrow.
. Tin' tug Alert lias not yet been eom
iiiNsloneil. Last evening the Maiine Hallway got
up Menm to take up llio whaler Alli
ance but by some mishap the piston rod
of one of the engines broke oif near the
end. and will cause a dflay until to
Tho Alliance is anchored in Hie
stream. She lias three masts but none
of them square ligged. Shu will go on
the Marine Hallway to-morrow morn
ing to make some alterations to her
The bark Caibarien, Capt Hubbard,
arrived off port last evening 2.5 days
from San Francisco. She has a deck
load of CO hogs for G- It Wood. 70 hogs
for S Ephrinis, a pony for F May, and
2 cows for Mr Herbert. She is con
signed to Hackfeld & Co.
Sailed from Newcastle for Honolulu
Feb 7th, Schr Reporter, Feb 2Hh. Haw-
bark Tlios Foster and Bktue Neptune.
The Brit bark Tycoon was loading at
Sydney. Feb 20th "for this port.
'The Brit b.irk Jupiter sailed from
Liverpool, March 21st, for Honolulu.
Arrivals at San Francisco Mai eh 1C,
SclirEinma Claudina from Hilo; Match
Ii), Brig J D Spreckels from Honolulu;
March 21, Sehr Ida Sclinauer from Ka
hului; .March 22. Bark Forest Queen
Honolulu; March 21, Stmr City of Syd
ney from Honolulu.
Departures from San Francisco for
Honolulu March 2(5, Brig Clans Sprec
kels. Tho brig AV II Meyer cleared at San
Francisco April 1st for this port.
April 1st, bark Foiest Queen and brig
.T D Spreckels were loading for Hono
lulu. i i , .
DIMOND'S LATEST CIRCULAR.
Sugar New York Exchanges of
the 25th ulto. report the market, for
raws as dull and nominal. Centri
fugals 95 percent, test 5 5-1G cents.
Consumers show no disposition to
replenish their stocks by purchases,
while holders havo not sought to
press their offerings upon a stagnant
market, and as the outlet for refined
does not improve the tendency is to
keep stocks of raw material within
tho narrowest possible limits.
Stock Importers' and refiners'
stocks together, 5 percent increase
over same time Inst year.
London, March 21th. Cane sugar
quiet, prices unchanged. Beet dull
and holders anxious to realize.
Stock in four ports U. K. 285,000
tons against 2(i0,000 tons last year.
Beet 88 percent test, lis lOJd.
Ilavanna, March 21. , Stocks 57,
000 tons, against (11,000 same time
Manila, March 20th. Extra su
perior No. 1, 12 13; March 31st.
12 Os. Making basis 4.99.
HAWAIIAN HOTEL CONCERT.
The Band will play at the Hotel
this evening at 7:30, in honor of
Mr. and Mrs. J. II. Jewett. The
following is the programme :
March Coronation Meyerbeer
Overture Jolly Bobbers .Suppc
Cavatlna Maico Viscontl I'etrcllu
ItcmlnUccnccs of lto-sini Godfrey
LIpoHpo ka Wal o Elelle.
Selection Madame Angot Lecocq
Gavotte The Stars Eatou
Polka .You and I....... Faust
Ahl AVela. Hawaii Ponol.
i i mi i mini milium ii
LOCAL & GENERAL NEWS.
Count Moiebultcr was a passen
ger by the Mnitposn.
Two hundred and sixty-six Chinese
arrived by the Mariposa.
- . . .
Wr, return our thanks to Purser
Guard of the Mariposa for a iilo of
11. R. II. Princess Likellke will
hold her usual reception to-nionow
Letti:i:s patent of denization have
been granted to Jeremiah Vander
A oan of prisoners arc at work
cleaning Fort street between Hotel
& Bcrctania street.
It took the Mariposa two hours.
and three quarters to come from
Coco Head to the wharf.
Lucas's whistle was troubled with
a1 slight hoarseness this morning
when signalling the steamer.
. .o. .
Tin: regular monthly meeting of
the Myrtle Hoat Club will be held
Friday evening at 7.30 o'clock.
Ir you want a nice shoe, boot,
slipper, or any kind of children
shoes, L Adlcr is the place for it.
13 Nuuanu street- 1)80. tf.
. Ex-sr,XATon Newton Booth of
California arrived by the Mariposa.
He was once Governor of that State
and is a brilliant speaker.
Tin: Hon. W. O. Smith arrived
by the Mariposa, looking well and
ftisky. We have to thank him for
The usual services
drew's, Fort Street
at St. Au
this evening at 7:30
The Royal Hawaiian Band
give ft concert at the Hotel
evening, complimentary to Mr.
Mrs. J. H. Jcwett.
Tin: regular quarterly meeting of
the Fire Police will be held to-morrow
evening at 7.30 o clock, at tiie
rooms of Kngine Co. No. 2.
. Tub Central Park skating link
and the toller coaster will ho closed
this evening. Next week there is
going lo be a Calico Carnival.
Ri:memiu:i: that Mr. Adams sells
the bankrupt stock of Kwong On
Tai, at No. 90 Nuuanu street, to
morrow mousing at 10 o'clock.
Tin: S. S. Mariposa arrived at
noon, G days 21 hours from San
Francisco. She brings a fair passen
ger list, and plenty of freight.
On Friday evening there will be a
lamale party at the Yosemite skating
rink. We do not know what it is
like, but you can find out by going.
Picture cord, and gold aud silver
wire, picture knobs, hooks, etc.,
also patent hooks for curtain hang
ing at King Bros.' Art Store. 990 3t
St. Albau's College will re-open
on Monday next for the summer
term. Applications for admission
should be made at once to Principal
The quarterly meeting of the
Woodlawn Dairy Stockholders will
be held at the Company's office, No.
83 Fort street, to-morrow morning
at 11 o'clock.
The prize cups and medals for the
races in the Honolulu Y. &B. Club's
regatta, arc being engraved and will
Ije presented to the winners some
time early next week.
Haktmann, who came in fourth in
the ten mile race, has issued a chal
lenge which has been accepted, but
wc are unable 'to say at the present'
what skater is lo be- pitted against
Last eveninir the piston rod of the
left hand engine at the Marine Rail
way broke. A new one is being
placed in to-day, and as soon as
repairs aio completed the steam
whaler Alliance will be hauled up.
Lewis & Co., the Hotel stret
grocers, received by the Mariposa
on ice, flounders, smelts, shad,
oysters in tin and shells, snipe, ce
lery, rabbits, crabs, salmon, rhu
barb, asparagus, cauliflowers, Cal.
rolled butter, cream cheese, and an
endless variety of good tilings.
Aiiout noon to-day a detachment
of tho King's) soldicrB was passing
Capt. Cluney's premises, when one
of them wantonly tore a picket off
the gate. Capt. Cluney went after
him with a stick, but did not over
take him. Such conduct is peculiar,
to say the least, on the part of a
Titian: was a good gathering at
the Yosemite Skating Hall last even
ing to participate in tho neck-tie and
npion party, but many thinking that
Mr. Wall was to furnish the tics and
aprons went there without any. Mr
Geo. Iluddy having tho largest
neck-tie won the prize, 85. The
music was splendid, and a very en-
joyablc evening was passed. Mr.
Wall says that when the enlarge
ment of the skating rink is complet
ed he will have one of the finest (
floors ever laid.
A young man as copyist is adver
The balance of the uniforms for
the Honolulu Rifles arrived on the
The Spreckels Do Young shooting
case came up in the Superior Court
Mar. 23, but was further postponed.
Tin: brig Claim Spreckels left San
Francisco March 27th for Honolulu
with an assorted cargo valued at
A KiiKsit lot of picture frames, in
new styles of mouldings, have been
received per Mariposa, and are
offered low bv West, Dow & Co.
Os March 30th, Pi esident Cleve
land sent in to the Senate tile nomi
nation of George W. Merrill, of
Nevada, for U. S. Minister to the
A veut elegant dancing party was
given last evening at the-rcsidence
of Col. and Mrs. C. II. Judd, Puna
hou, to which a large number of
guests had been invited.
- .. .. m
TiiEitE was a large demand last
evening and this morning at the City
meat market, for some of that line
grain-fed pork. It would be hard
to find finer-looking meat.
Tin: following sales of Ilawuiian
Commercial Co.'s shares took place
'at the San Francisco Stock Exchange
March 28th : 100 at S3.37A and 25
b 10 at S3.37J. On the 31st, 50
were sold at 83.25.
The Honolulu Rifles had a regular
business meeting last evening, when
eleven new members were elected.
Some preliminary arrangements were
also made with regard to the full
dress parade to bo held on the 21 th
in Music Hall.
A large number of people at
tended the doughnut sociable at the
Bethel Union Church vestry last
evening. It was a very pleasant aud
enjoyable affair. The doughnuts
were of the most superior kind and
the coffee was Al. The budge of
honor was awarded to Mrs. Jay
Gi cone's contribution, the judges
having no easy task in dt't-iding.
Mk. Max Kohm has a splendid
piece of work on exhibition tit the
store of "West, Dow & Co. It is a
statue of His Majesty King Kala
kaua, dressed in the uniform of a
Prussian General with decorations.
The figure is eighteen inches high,
and stands on a pedestal of the same
height. The body is a copper color,
and the decorations arc gilded.
The tenor singer of the Bethel
Church choir went to the doughnut
sociable last evening, aud this morn
ing he is troubled with dyspepsia.
It appears that when he went there
last evening he was somewhat
hungry, and went for the first
doughnut he could lay hands on. It
looked well on the outside, but the
inside was filled with cotton.
The St. Louis College was en
larged considerably at the beginning
of the year, but it is evident is it not
by any means adequato to tho wants,
for a number of applications for
boarders have been refused the last
week or so. The boarding school is
about too full, and the number of
boys who will attend the school
when it re-opens next Monday will
be about 400.
The San Francisco Dramatic Com
pany arrived by the Mariposa and
consists of nine members, among
them Billy Sims the well-known
comedian. They will open on Sat
urday evening in
for a limited season
will prevail. Their headquarters will
be at Mr. Jos. E. Wiseman's busi
ness agency, Merchant street, where
scats can be obtained Friday morn
ing. Mr. J. P Rutledge is the
Yesterday tho boarders of St.
Louis College, to tho number of
fifty, headed by the school band,
marched out to the residence of Mr.
T. A. Lloyd, Kalilii, to enjoy a
day's picnic. On thu way out tho
boys who were accompanied by their
faithful instructors, the Brothers
and Father Lconore, went through
a number of evolutions which wero
very creditable. Arriving at Kalilii
the doy was spent in singing, play
ing games, bathing, and other ways.
A large number of friends of the
school went out, and one featuro of
tho day was the excellent playing of
the band. The boys had all they
wanted in the way of refreshments.
His Lordship the Bishop of Olba
paid a visit to the merry party du
ring the afternoon. At 4 o'clock
all returned home delighted with
their holiday picnic.
k,Now your talk has the true ling,"
said the girl to her lover when lie
began to speak of a diamond circlet.
Groat Slaughter in the Soudan.
French DisaBtors in Tonquin.
Poaoeful Prospools Botwoon
land and Russia.
GENERAL GRANT FAILING.
A Kouellion in Canada !
Americans Insulted in Panama I
THE SOUDAN WAIt.
In an engagement nearTamai, on
Sunday the 22nd, the British lost
580 in killed and wounded, includ
ing camp-followers. The rebel loss
is placed at 3,000. There was a
skirmish on the following Tuscdtiy,
in which -100 Arabs were killed.
On the 28th, Gen. Graham reach
ed Gen. McNeill's strong-hold on
the Tamai road, with tho whole
British force except 500 men from
each regiment left behind to gar
rison Suakim. Osman Digna, the
rebel leader's, loss for the previous
week was given at -1,000. Forty
percent of the mariners at Suakim
were sick of fever and had sore eyes.
The New South Wales contiogent
arrived at Suakim on March 29th,
and was congratulated by General
Graham on its fine appearance. It,
was to have taken part in the ad
vance on Tamai.
General Graham was to have be
gun the advance upon Tamai on
April 1st, but, owing to news that
Osman Digna had evacuated Hash
een, the advance was postponed.
El Maluli is fortifying the ap
proaches to Berber and concentrat
ing troops in that quarter.
Latest accounts represent Osman
Digna as being deserted by most
of his forces. Nevertheless the
British War Office expect to hears of
General Wolseley has gone to
Cairo under orders from the Govern
ment. Generals Graham and McNeill
were severely rated in the Loudon
press for their operations resulting
in the terrible massacre of March
22nd. Their recall by tho War
Office was discussed.
the ruANCo-ciiiKEsn wau.
A panic was produced on the
Paris Bourse on March 27th, by bad
news from the forces in Tonquin.
At that date it was said that only a
great French victory in Tonquin
would save the French Ministry.
Instead of a victory, a French
defeat was the next announcement.
The Chinese carried the key of the
French position at Langson on the
27th of March. The French troops
retreated beyond Dong Dong. Gen.
Ncgricr was severely wounded.
lhe Chinese forces were said to
have numbered 50,000. The tele
grams from Gen. Dc Lisle were
silent as to the French losses, but
Paris papers of the 30th March said
tho killed and wounded French num
bered 1,200. De Lislc's despatches
called for reinforcements in an im
ploring tone, as if the situation was
The Paris Gaulois says one
fourth of the whole effective French
force at Laugson was left on the
field. General Glovcnilli was en
trenched in a critical position at Ihi
Dohan, being surrounded and his
retreat cut off by 12,000 Black
Tremendous excitement ensued in
Paris upon receipt of the news. In
the Chamber of Deputies an up
roarious scene occurred. When tho
Premier had beguu his statement .of
tho situation, he was loudly hissed
from the galleries. At'the closo of
his speech Deputies of the Right
sprang to their feet, shouting,
" Down with the wretch," and above
the din Clemcnccau could be heard
At the opening of the session,
March 30lh, the Premier asked for
u Tote of credit of 40,000,000 francs
on account of the military opera
tions in China. The motion wts re
jected by a vote of 308 to 10 1.
Ferry immediately announced the
resignation of the Ministry.
That night n motion of urgency
for a vote to impeach the Ministry
was rejected by 301 to 101.
Royalists predict the downfall of
the Republic as the outcome of the
disasters in China.
On March 31st, M. Do Frevci-
net was trying to form a new Minis
try. The War Department was
hastening the despatch of troops to
Tonquin. Ten thousand men and
four batteries of artillery were to
have left Marseilles on Saturday,
lth April. Gen. Negrier's wound
was reported to have assumed a
KN'UI.AN!) AND UUSMA.
In the British House of Lords,
March 27, Lord Granville said there
wus nothing indicating a tendency to
iiincu on nic pare or tno ijovern-
ment regarding the Afghan ques
tion, tho Government firmly adher
ing to the policy agreed upon by
the great political parlies, while at
the same time Government officials
were availing themselves of every
means to at rive at u satisfactory
solution of thu difficulty. He was
unable to fix n dale when negotia
tions would be completed. The
Ameer of Afghanistan had instruct
cu nis cincis to ooscrve iieiuraniy.
There was talk in the Loudon
press on the 27th of England having
sent an ultimatum, containing tho
proposal that both the Russians and
tho Afghans should withdraw from
tho disputed territory, and that
Russia declined the pioposnl, on the
ground that the withdrawn! of her
troops would bo the source of humi
liation to Russia.
In the House of Commons, on
March 30th, however, the Marquis
of llartington, Secretary of State
for War, said the last advices the
Government have received from St.
Petersburg were lo the effect that a
peaceful solution of the Russo-Af-ghan
question was more promising
than at any lime since the difficulty
Paris opinion is given against the
probability of war. It is held thcic
that a war would be such a terrible
blow to the banking interests of
Euiopc that it is sure lo be averted.
Wlic.it in London dropped two
cents a bushel, March 30th, owing
to tho more pacific news.
The conlerits of a telegram from
the Russian Minister Dc Gicr.s to
the Russian Ambassador in London,
shown to Earl Granvillo March 31st,
were withheld from Parliament until
preliminaries had been settled for a
meeting of the Joint Boundary Com
mission. It was reported on latest date that.
Lord Duffenn, Viceroy of India, was
negotiating with the Ameer for a
formal treaty recognizing a British
Protectorate over Afghanistan.
Until peace is assured the existing
ordcra for fitting out the naval re
serves, the purchase of transports
and the despatch ofj rc-cnforcemcnts
lo India will bo carried out.
It is reported that the military
council held at St. Petersburg ad
vised the Russian Government
against enteting upon a war until
the railway to Sarakhs has been
Lhe Russian corvette Djylut lias
left Cnllno for San Francisco to join
the Russian squadron. I lor Majesty's
steamer Sappho also left suddenly,
destination unknown, even leaving
The Russian Army in the Cau
casus is estimated by Count Voquc,
brother-in-law of General Anakoff,
to be 100,000 men.
Gen. Grant was in a very weak
condition at latest accounts. People
hud begun to show anxious sympa
thy by gathering about his .house.
Accounts of his condition were
issued every few minuteu. On the
last night of March he was casj-,
had slept five hours out of the
twenty-four, and pulse and tempera
ture were normal.
A KiaiEI.I.ION IS CANADA.
A rebellion has broken out in the
Canadian Noitliwest Territory. The
insurgents are French-Indian half
breeds and bands of full-blood In
dians. Louis Ricl, whoso rebellion
in 1800, Lieutenant, now Gen. Lord
Wolseley, suppressed, is the leader
of the uprising. Fort Carleton,
Piinec Albert, was attacked by tho
insurgents, and fifteen mounted
police who went to defend it were
massacred. The rebels captured
and imprisoned foity wiiitcs and
look possession of stores. It wus
said the rebels numbered 1,000
hardy men on March 25th, since
which many bands have gone on the
war path. The first tioops left
Winnipeg by special train on tho
25th for the scene of disturbance.
Tn a later battle about forty rebels
fell under the lire of the Mounted
Troops arc going forward from
the East. French half-breeds were
holding secret meetings at Foit Ed
monton, and emissaries from Ricl's
camp wero stirring up the Indians in
There 1ms been a battle between
the Guatemalan and San Salvador
forces. San Salvador, Nicaragua
and Costa Rica have formed an alli
ance to protect themselves against
the revolutionary schemes of the
Panama revolutionists havo been
committing outrages on Americans
in Hint country. They arrested olll
ccrs of the Pacific Mail Company
and others. They also refused to
allow Utitish mails lo go forward.
Neither the American nor British
war vessels there did anything to
prevent or resent the outrages.
MINIS! EK LOWEI.I. HEOAI.tEl).
Mr. James Russell Lowell, Ameri
can Minister to ICnglaud, has been
iccalled, and Mr. E. J. Phelps, of
Vermont, appointed to succeed him.
A man 'never realizes how little
his word is worth till he receives u.
black eye, and attempts to explain
how he came by it.
A USEFUL INVENTION.
A Williatnsport genius claims to
have invented a buggy that, like the
boy's whistle, goes itself that Is, it
docs not require a horso to make it
go. It is furnished with two upright
levers in front of the scat, by moans
of which the rider can propel it with
great enso six or seven miles an ,
hour. If he hai a feminine partner
he can use one lever and she the
other. If the weather and scenery
are delightful the riders can be as
deliberate as they please. They
can stop to rest if they want to un
der a big shade tree without being
compelled to pull at the bit of an
impatient horse, or make themselves
hoarse shouting "whoa" to him.
The now buggy will not scare and
run nwoy, wrecking itself and ruin
ing the feathers and finer- of its
fair occupant. And there is no
horse with eyes to sec and give awy
any trilling improprieties that may
bo indulged in. As to cheapness,
thu new buggy does not eat, does
not have to be rubbed down four
times n day, docs not want a new
set of blankets every fall and a new
harness and whip once a year. In
6hort, the cost of the buggy, which
is about that of the modern bicycle,
is alt the outlay required.
It is evident from this description
that thu Williatnsport invention fills
n long-fell want. When the now
buggy has become popularized,
everybody will ride, of course, and
livery-stublu keepers with their vexa
tious bills will go out of fashion.
Romeo and Juliet as they take their
daily drive in the park, each work
ing a lever of the new vehicle, will
be taking practical lessons in the art
of working in matrimonial harness.
If any would-be Juliet should prove
, lazy to work licr lever, Romeo would
understand at once that he had bet
ter be looking for a new Juliet with
a more industrious turn of mind.
The ordinary riders will ride for
pleasure and go as slow or as fast as
their muscles and surplus energy
dictate, instead of feeling compelled
as now, to drive like Jehu in order,
to get their money's worth out of a
hired horse or team.
A PRIMITIVE BAROMETER.
The barometer used by the rem"
mint of tiie Araucanian race, inhabit"
ing tiie southern province- of Chile
consists of the castoff shell of a crnb
which is said to be extremely sensi"
live to atmospheric changes, remain"
ing quite white in fair, dry weather,
but indicating the npptoach of a
moist atmosphere by the approach of
small led ".pots, which grpw both in
number and in size a the moisture
in the air increases, until finally,
with the actual occurrence of rain,
the shell becomes entirely red and
remains so throughout the rainy sea
son. Pittsburg Dispatch.
Bailey wrote from London to an
American paper: "The English eat
breakfast at eic;ht o'clock or later,
lunch at one o'clock, and have din
ner at six or seven o'clock. The
breakfast is light, the luncheon
similar, and the dinner is quite
hearty. One English dinner in the
inexperienced American stomach will
produce that night eight bears with
calico tails, eleven giants with illum
inated heads, one awful dog with
twelve legs, and fourteen bow-legged
ruffians chased by a host of piratical
cjulilloweri mounted on saddles of
beef roasted. Any respectable chem
ist will corroborate this statement."
A witty deacon puts it thus:
'Now, brethren, let us get up a sup
per and cat ourselves rich. Buy
your food : then give it to the church ;
then go and buy it back again ; then
cat it up, and your church debt is
'Sweet little maid with
tiie sweet blue
thou dancing m much and .so
Saucily nodding her shapely head.
"I'm whooping it up until Lent," she'1
paid. ' irtrcMr.
The curate (nervously) "I'm
pony not to sec you oftener at
church, Sir Gorgius!" Sir Gor
gius "Oh ah yes! My old he
ncmy, the gout, -cr know. But if
the funds are dickey, shall bo very
'.ippy to send you a check!" The
curate "Oh, thank you, Sir Gor
gius ! That'll do just in well !"
A traveller through Arabia writei
that when a Bedouin is asked to
drink his answer would frequently
be: "No, thanks; I drank yester
day." In this country the answer
usually is: "Well, I have been at
it all tho morning, but I guess I can
Uncle John "Well, Jimmy, have
you enjoyed yourself to-day?" Jim
my "No, I haven't. I've had a
miserable day." "Miserable day?
How's that?" "Aunt Betsey told
mc to eat all tho dinnor I wanted ;
and I couldn't."
I If there is anything above ground
j more thoroughly permeated with
i blissful serenity than a woman with
borne new clothes it is a hoy who has
jujit learned to whistle. Chicago'
"Ah! you flutter mo," lisped a
dude to a pretty girl with whom. he
was conversing. "No, I don't,"
was the reply, "ion couldn't uo
any natter tlian you are." j,