Newspaper Page Text
nuii p,i mnipl upmy'" 'J ' W) lAiffrt'"
EVENING nOl.tETI.V. HONOLULU. T. H . THURSDAY. SEPT. 20, 190C.
Little Fab,les of Society
(A HmlJ 5 nunc author
with j g6oJ ar-peUt
UXVijiKXHlXirxXi clerk, ns ho coughed )maplhotlcally
V THE FABLE OF THE ABSENT-
MINDED MAN. X
HIlo wanted to make an Im
i: wan gotUn tip regardless of
time and expense,
prcsslon. i t t) . nut that camo la
ter. Krom the crown of tils top hat to the
tip or his pntent leathers he was Irre
pioachably gowned. Ills roat was ot
the latest New York mode; Ills vest
was a study In aesthetics; ujs tic was
a 8) ni phony.
As ho entered the lift of the Young
Hold he was accosted by the Man
lrom Chicago with "Come on, old
man, and hae a game of pool."
"Thanks, awfully, old chap. I'd
like to, don't jou know, hut I hao nti
engagement. Some other time," re
plied the Well Uroomed Man, ns ho lit
'Oh, licg pardon; queening, as usu
al, 1 fte," retorted the Man from Chi
cago, with an Indulgmt smllo as of
one looking down from heights stipe
tlor upon a pilgrim far below, Tho
Man Prom Chicago had been crossed
In love. The WellOroomed Man was
cry young, and there were soveral
clasjcs ahead of him. So ho turned
his (are toward Deretanla street. Ho
was going to call on tho Popular Olrl.
When ho arrived nt tho Enchanted
Castle where the excuse for nil his
grandeur resided ho was shown In by
tho little almond eyed Celestial who
did duty for maid of all work.
"MIIks I.lco, shla up sllalr; I sec If
the at homo," snld the llttlo servant
as ho took tho Well Groomed Man's
card, (Itlco wasn't her name though.-
When Miss ltlco had received her
tlslloi'ii card shu had merely glanced
"It's j our treat, old man.'
And they had something together
In tho roof garden.
MOItAL: All Is not bridal that's
Newest Ilrldd. sweetly, "nl the Very
lart mlntito the llurtim twins had tho
colic, ntid Chloo had to disappoint me,
Iheic wasn't lime to get another
maid from the cinplojmtnt bureau,
ntid Just when I was In despair 1
thought of these things t wore In tho
KKHKyXMU KKVWXJfWtfh 'Kleptomaniac' last winter, nt tno
if k Shakespeare Club. Yon know I took
U THE FABLE OF THE TACT- the put of Knile, thf maid, and the
V LE83 WOMAN. X things were new mid frcth. Bo liar-
W r), llko a dear, paid he'd hticl: up
tttf.XXtfSXXXwKKWKHXtf ,! oro tho dinner," and a wire-
- Hi: hour was !", o'clock and Iho lesa mesxago flashed from llio Diuo to
I ..I-- M nH fl.n Innnl nf llm 11.il. I fl... lit-mitl nP,l. Ill till P CIt UrlllO
looked for n moment up nt her gal
Innt j onus husband.
"You sco 1 couldn't disappoint -tho
little girl," said Harry, with a smllo
ni ho tool: off his npron, "and I
place wan tho lanal of tho lto
nl Hawaiian Hotel, where n
congenial group'tif women of the Hill
torlal party were enjoying a cosy that
over a cup of tea.
Talk about the 'simple life'! Why,
rMAi tl ... ..rt1 rnfliilnflnna Willi nil ViO
Why. my una in reduced to the Daughlers, when choosing a husband,
condition of shredded ocoinut al- '- " M '.M
ready and tho trip Isn't half over ct." , " nB "c" "" IvuInr lrlc1'8'
exqlnlmul tho woman In white linen 1 )( k v v
as siio neipeu ncrscii 10 hit suh-iiui
(.bio thliigsilesccndcil the staircase
to the drawing room.
Tho Other Side.
"What ehai'iiilng girls thnio two
with the !olts were," said Mrs. Uluo
lllood to her hostess some hours In
ter, ns sho was stijlng her ndleux.
They sccinrd to bn so clccr and
I rlehl. t nultn wished von hnd nlacod
them nearer me, so 1 eould hnvo en- j
Joyed them. It lit so seldom nowa- j
iias, my dear, that ono meets n girl tj
r. ;..:..;...'..'. :. .v. ..'..?.:.;..'. mks' ?.?.'.
U Come nd IJleiy t
V, . " .
who Is a good diner out. Most ot
them are bo Insipid and stercotped,
and It ) on meet ono who Isut sho Is
tho rtsquo s;la one Is nlnnjs afraid
cf. iteally, jour oung friends nccr
cccmed lo be at n lsi for something
clover to say and the) seemed tn be Jj UQiuan HfiUfC fifl I H '
qulto adequate- to each other. I should llflndll.ll ItGiYO UUii LIUim;
lick to know them better I mint I ti-
vlto them to my next dinner.'
MORAL: If jotl ilnnt I now the
nniv.cr, noicr mind; just moisten
jonr lips mid look plcasint, and (he
lest Is car).
"How do j on nccoum for nil iheo
earthquake:, prnfosor?" Inquired r.ir
rrcr Hrjip of Ms suninirr boarder
"I hudr; mow how to account for
Its mechanism Is so simple';!
that a child can play It, while j.
at the same time there Is),
hardly any limit to the degree
of proficiency a skillful per-J1:
former can attain In the mas. ij
tery of exprettlon. '.
There lo noW.'ng musleallyr
beyond Its teach. ;
I cy f.r It, It su vvls'i, by J
'e i 3. ' i. .'
i.:. w d t-y It at j:
ALLX. YOUNG DUILDINO i
""" " .!.-.... '''ilinmlit It was n Ink. Now I know I tnem. I think tsero li something
Ino In getting moro strenuous every . "fc''' " "' n ' ... ,.i. .' ,Z noreshllnir eoilal.1 iiart, nf thn
. I can t bear to miss a thing, mid ' "" "" , ' .ca'fi" I
these delightful trlpi and dancei """ """' ' ' '' " .. i "Dy gum 'I b'llve cie lit IM Us
Irlioa ninl llilnpii nro innklnc mo' iin"- uii".i". "" ! "'.Iho hcatv rrnna!" Allium i:rnr-in
o niiiirc enii'iRt iliuii. i
niiiiuii nuiiii: ii.uin I'tint
thirty, with herldack hnlr and Irlshl
ces, ner smooiu complexion aim girl
ish form, sho docsu t look a day over
"Actually, my dear," she said to the
vivacious blondo In blue, "I'm com
pletely fagged out. I feel a hundred!"
when up spska tho Tactless One, the
llttlo woman who nlwavs means well
but never knows qulto how to express
what sho means':
"A hundred! Why, my dear, joh
don't look half that!"
And she never knew why the wom
an In whlto llnon stiffened and de
clined a third cup of tea.
MCHIAI.! It U usiiallr silent to
nl It and then nt ilia mirror, given n t)mE0 t, subject wlum even the ro-
mottut mention Is made of a woman
pat or two to her brown lialr aim
i.onti down to tho drawing room.
Tho next afternoon two girl friends
of tho l'opiilar Olrl came over In their
"electric for a cup of tea and a bit ol
gossip In the lanal, but finding she
was dressing they ran up to her room
for n cosy chnt, tojlng wflh tho sllvet
Hides on tho dressing table as they
talked. The1 girl In tho Alice blue
toquo spied the bit of pasteboard 1)
Ing Innocently on tho dressing table
nnd picked It up to see who her
frli nd's most recent caller had been
ust as the Popular Olrl had Intended
shu should do oil-tho time. Suddenly
blue cushions ot tho couch, whero she
went off into peals ot laughter.
"Why, Hess, what's the matter!"
exclaimed tho brunctto in tho pink
linen. A moment later she, too, wis
seized with a paroxism ot mirth,
"Why, girls, what Is tho matter?"
exclaimed their hostess, In surprise.
'What nro jou laughing nt?"
"Oh, Allcen!" (Her name Isn't Al
lecn, cither.) "How long slnco you
hnvo taken In washing? How much
do you charge n dozen nnd do you pro
fer flannel or linen?" teased tho girl
with tho blonde braids, jirovoklngly,
ns sho handed her hostess her late
caller's visiting card.
"No; tho other side," prompted tho
girl In tho pink linen and as tho mys
tified hostess glanced at tho revcrso
side ot tho bit ot pasteboard her puz
rled expression gavo placo to ono ot
utter Incredulity and horror as sho
beheld her lecent caller h iuuiiqi i..
It was plain, and unmlstnkabl)
clear as to meaning, and nothing had
Bocks C pair
Sho got no further, but tho story
did, and if tho WellOroomed Man
chances to read thtB papei ho will
know why thn l'opulnr Olrl looked at
him with that llttlo aggravating twin
kle In her brown ejos at tho roof gar
lien dancu the other night.
MOItAL: Never uso jour visiting
card for a laundry list, lest. In a mo
ment ot abstraction you Icavo it upon
a lady unawares.
age, oven If sho herself refers to It
I rent calamities often mi) bo thus
THE FABLE OF THE HU8-
4. BAND WHO WORKED. V
TANTtS WHO COUNTED.
f riDiA r"invr3
Best 5c Smoke
HAYSELDCN TOBACCO CO., f
The Dublin corporal Ion has decided
In hive nil tho munlilpnl rarts iMtcinl
in lVr ili'irnrlOH
OF THE DCBU- 3f
r J V If V tf rf M ti If n n n,
T v.ni their first J.eop on our Inl-,
mid look rrlr.hl kind nt nffnlr and
thev dreaded II. llul .Mrs Kxrlw '
sIvo'b nffnlis wcro nlwnvn so smart i
and Ihcy v.tnted to appear accustom
ed to that r.nrt nf thing.
i Just enn't think ot n thing In Inll:
I'bout," said thn girl In cream lnro as
sho fasti ueil a longhtemnicd Anieil-
finn llcaulv In her girdle, then stood
'wt'rWWirvvtrwwAA.vy vtxwirvirtvvuirt i
ALAKEA ST., KAPIOLANI BUILDING
Phone Main 147 City Delivery
Competent Clothing Cleaners
b.irk from the mirror to get tho ef
"I have a Bchcme," exclaimed tho
Kesoiirceful One. ns tho light of sud
den Inspiration shono in her grn
C)cs. "We'll Just iciunt. Nobody will
know tho dllfcrenco nnd It will bo nil
light, nnd whin wo inn out of things
to nny no ono vlll ever guiss. Our
phces nro together, for Mrs. Uxclu
slve told mo mi. I'll Just turn to Jim
and say. 'One. twn, three, four, five
six. seven, eight?" and jou can mi),
Nine, ten, i liven, twelve. Wo'll
IT happened nl a dinner of tho Shirt smllo nnd chango our expression mil
Waist Club, n' well know ndovo club i everyono will think wc nre talking.
r n.t.rrV nrnl.1 nn.l aunn matrons. Cnu tfK go down," nnd the girl In
of merry molds and voung matrons,
Alio gather every two weeks about
tho card tablus fur their favorite garni'
idio fell Into a heap among tho pale-iof five hundred. It is a rulo of tilts
.. . a.i t I . I. . I !..- (. w.l.AHAanMn Hinrn.
XKAilJI M , U.X.IfK.XStW
V THE FABLE OF THE MAN
X WHO WA8NT SURE. X
n. X w X x eX xu.nit.Hw.HJl u
M AlMtAID jou havo mado a mis
take," said tho tall young man from
Lot Ancclcs with slightly Hushed
rounteuaneo as ho accosted llio eierit
ot tho Young Hotel a few moments
alter being shown to Ills room last
Friday. "I think you havo given me
tho wrong room. I'm not that Is
1, cr, 1 haven't any wife I guess you
hnvo put mo in tho bridal chamber.
I'll Just tako an ordinary room, If you
don't mind," concluded tho jonth with
a relieved nlr, as ho tried to look un
concerned. "Ilrldal chamber?" repeated tho
clerk, looking mystified. "I don't
think I qulto understand. Just wait
a minute. I'll look In on jou."
"You nro In iimpty-two, aro you
not? Yes: I thought so. That Isn't
tho bridal chamber. It Is on tho floor
"Hut tho white laco curtains?" mur
mured tliq youth, meekly. "I thought
"Mosquitoes!" tersely explained Iho
nouular club that whenever a mem
her so far succumbs to Dan Cupld'fi
wiles as to pledgo her faith to "take
the vclP at the altar hymeneal sho is
o bo honored by tho club with a
matlnco party nnd dinner on tho last
Saturday of her maidenhood, ami vory
Jullchtful aro these llttlo antenup
tial affairs for tho fair In Mob to bo.
This particular dinner was being
slven by tho Newest Hrldc, who was
for tho first tlmo slnco her own mar
riage, a month bctore, offering tho
hospitality of her cosy home. Kv co
ining, from soft silken shades of the
candles to tho ribbons on tho place
cards and tho frock of tho hostess.
was carried out In crimson, lovo's owr.
color. Tho tablo sparkled with new
crystal nnd freshly engraved bIIvit,
tho coming out parly of tho wedding
clfts. and tho snowy napcry vvna bo
Inir christened for tho first time, it
.uJ a dovo dinner nnd tho men wcro
conspicuous by their absence.
Tho llttlo hostess was not a rich
s.an'H wife nnd sho did not keep a
maid, but for this one time she hnd
tnraged a llttlo colored nursemaid
rrom her neighbor's, across tho street.
o servo the dinner, bo Hint sho might
bo frco to entertain her guests.
Tho dinner was perfect, and Chloo
had not made a mistake. Sho pnssel
things on tho proper sblo; she was
careful not to touch tho tnblo wllh
the eaiaro ns bIio rcflllul tho glasses;
sho remeiubcied tn lenitive tho olives
before (.ho brought In tint dessert.
I'rom tho irlsp ruffles on nor mg
llttlo npron to tho saucy pcrklness of
her tiny enp she wan absolutely eor
tcct. 8ho anticipated every vvnnt of tho
giieuts. us n good maid should, and It
took but n gltineo from tho hostess'
bluo ejea tn rnnvey a command. Heal
Iv. Chloo was u wonder, thought ev
ery one of tho guests, and raih regis
tered a vow to employ this p.irtlculir
mail thn next tlmii Mio eiiterlnliieu
Coffio was being served In tho
draw Inn room. As Chloo entered
with tho sugar tray her skirl luugm
awkwardly in tho door. There was n
smothered exclamation from Chloo. It
wnsn't a Sunday school waul, elllier,
and It wasn't smothered qulcwy
enough. Sixteen spoons clattered in
sixteen saucers, and sixteen pairs of
bright eyes stared Intently nt tho
now maid. "Why, Harry!" gasped
tho girl In sen foam eiepo, "yho
would ever havo thought It!"
"Well, I beg jour pardon for tho
word," said iho Newest Hrldo's hus
band, rucfullj-, as ho met tho re
proachful glaneo ot his llttlo wlfo
from behind tho coffeo urn,
"I'm not used to wearing theso ox
alted togs, you know, and d , I mean
tho pesky things get all tangled up In
a fellow's feet. How jou girls stand
petticoats beats mo," and tho pcrBplr
ing maid looked apologetic,
"Why, jou sco, girls," explained tho
champagne volte tucked n hunch nl
violets In her bell.
"There sho Is now tho guest ot
honor. Mrs. Ditto lllood," ns n haugh
ty woman In a I'aqulu gown nnl n VI
rot hat sailed majestically across tlic
The twu debutantes, fooling unuttcr-
Do You Want Them?
There Is a heap of sitl'actlon In being satisfied with
your appcaranco and nothing promotes this feeling like
Then If your clothing regularly receives competent at
tcntlon from cleaners who know how, there Is a consider
able saving In your clothing expenditures. Tho cleaner
who knows how, s'ves your clothing and don't ruin It
with over hot Irons o- dangerous nelds, as Is to often the
ease with the unexperienced workman
Our workmen nre competent, know how and have had
lots of experience, and it doein't matter what It Is that
needs attention, whether It's a buslnesi, outing, evening
suit or ladles' woolen skirts, It wilt be properly attended
to here. We call for and deliver without extra charge.
Telephone us wcMI do the rest.
'Men's Sack Suits and Ladies' Woolen Skirts -j
Tuxedos or Evening Suits
liIMMiftMiiilWiiilili I MH HH .
The Royal Hawaiian Hotel
iLLLLEvKSinKXjSVKttiL v" .fi 4w rij
ViBBBB&iVSjtl 3ftA ffnHQ' ittBmlti9mltltiBIUHB&BuKi.Jttw&MHU
SjA,Tr"'K IbbbVC a1 '3SE7rvLBW7riBvFZjsflLBB55tlBB
i 1 ' iKj i l j-i satwiiBBMii biPtsW at. krj Mm-l
KmIr 'x. mt i I, in 'liiiiiflBMBMfcM BlsvSflBBBBVHiBVIflHPyVVBWK uH m Hvsn 4 M
B-MpBMM -lM ,ftfPfTYMMlrMlBBBMlBTrTl l'MlBtiBBBKBIBMBrTrrHB V' IMM&f "
niHSBBsBBBBBJEfl7ir.ig , XJ:dBE.IkVfe4,rSarLBllBBKBBBBBBBBBBKl
BsflBBHiBBliVilWUvaffMnTP.M , ! ,hllSTBlB-aBTVBBBBSlIPSBBBiSBBBBBBBBM
THE ONLY TROPICAL HOTEL IN HONOLULU
Tourists take notice. Do you want a Tropical Hotel on your arrival at
Honolulu? With all up to-date service? Then go to tho ROYAL HAWAII-
AN. You eat 3 times a day on beautiful alnalo, out of doors, all the year
round; 2200 Electric Lights; a dance on the arrival of the Alameda every
' month and numerous gatherings all tho time. The eutilne Is managed by
the manager. Hot and cold water throughout tho building.
AMERICAN PLAN ... $2.50 TO 9U.50
EUROPEAN PLAN $1.00 TO $2.00
Henry Bews, Manager
WATCHMAKER AND JEWELER, FORT STREET.
Selling Agent for the Celebrated
I Hamilton Watch Company
Especial prices, $35 for No. 012 movement, 21, extra
fine ruby jewels, In gold settings, nickel, double roller
escapement, steel escape wheel, sapphire pallets, patent
Mlcrometle Regulator, Drcguet Hairspring, Double sunk
Dial, beautifully finished nickel plates, gilt lettering,
steel parts Champferred. Adjusted to temperature, Iso
chronltm and Positions.
This movement on exhibition In store window.
f 1066 Fort St., near Hotel
lave a Practical Horse-Shoor
SHOE YOUR HORSE
Owners of horses are often neglectful, to their cost, In
having their horses shod. A horse should be reshod once a
month. Proper and timely shoeing prevents corns and
cracked hoofs and absolutely Insures against the frog becom
ing diseased, also doing away with the likelihood of other
hoof diseases, to which a horse Is liable. A practical horse
choer recognizes the signs ot these diseases and cleans and
trims the hoof and sets the shoe so ns to stop Injurious for
SatlsDed customers are our most convincing evidence
that a horse is correctly shed here. There Is no extra charge
for practical shoeing knowledge. Prices are the minimum.
Stock Yards Shoeing Shop,
KINO NEAR PUNCHBOWL 8T.
EDWARD SCOTT, Proprietor.
TELEPHONC MAIN 450.
Thos. G. Thrum
8TATIONER, DOOKSELLER, PUDLISHER.
AT THE SAME OLD STAND, 1003 FORT ST., HONOLULU.
FINE STATIONERY. Constant renewalc of latest styles of so
clelv Stationery In tablet, aulre. bo or naneterle form! vari
ous weights; plain or ruled. Envelopes to match ream or tab- I
BOOKS. Latest works of Tlctlon by most popular authors recelv
ed regularly. A large variety of miscellaneous books always
In stock. Headquarters for Books pertaining to Hawaii, wheth
er historic, descriptive, travel, language, or other character.
PUBLISHER. THE HAWAIIAN ANNUAL; the recognized refer
ence book of Hawaii, Issued each December for the following
year, devoted to Statistics, Research, and General Information
relating to Hawaii's progress. . An 8-vo. of 200 or more pages.
Price, 75 cts. BIRDS OF THE HAWAIIAN ISLANDS, with
notes on their habits, by H. W. Henchaw; an 8 vo. of 14C
pages. Price, $1. EARLY NORTHERN PACIFIC VOYAGES;
a narrative of several trading voyages between Hawaii, China,
and the Northwest Coast, by Peter Corney, 12 mo. cloth, 138
pp. Price, $1.
Honolulu Tobacco Co.,
THE ORIGINAL EXCLUSIVE
NOW IN NEW QUARTERS
JUST OPP08ITE OLD STAND ON
Fort near Hotel Street
A FIRST-CLAS AND COMPLETE
LINE OF ALL 8TANDARD CIOARS,
CIGARETTES AND TOBACCOS.
JU8T IN A NEW LINE OF
I' -. , ' - Li