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RVKN1N0 TIULLF.TIN, noNOLULr, T. II.. Kill DAY, MY II 1909
j. Bynic, for eight years employed
Sby Hid Meliopolltiin Meat Com
jnn. Limited, ns Hh collector, has
Iii!iIIk1ip(I 11 rullcrtlun agency nt
(join 1 1 Campbell lilurk, Merchant
Street. Honolulu. HefcreiKu: U.
3 Wnllor. 4292-lm
'.' Schumann. Hours 8-9 a. u.;
3-G i. in. 224 Emma Square.
"or Wnlnnne, Walalua, Kahukii and
ir, Stations 9:1G a. in., 3.2U p. in.
for l'onrl City, Kwa Mill and Way J
Ulona t7:30 . ra !: IE a, m.,
1:05 a. in., 2:15 i. in.. 320 p. m..
;15 p. in., (9:30 p. in., til :00 p. in.
Por Wnhlawn 9:16 h. m. and
JIG p. iu.
Arrive Honolulu from Kahuku,
sjjnluu and Walanuo "S:36 a. in.,
5(31 p. m.
Arrive In Honolulu from Ewa Mill
d Pearl CIl 17. Hi a. in., 8:311
n.. 10-38 n. in., M:4U i. in., 4:31
i., B:31 p. m., '7::m p. in.
Arrive Honolulu from Wahlawa
iO a. in. and 6:31 p. u..
nKx. Stindny. '
tl Sunday Only.
The Hnlelun Limited, n two-hour
lln (only tlrst-ciss tlckvts lion
Id), leaven llonoliilit pury Sunday
if. -22 n in.; ictiirnliig, arrives In
tfjolulii nt 111-IP p m The Limited
is only at I'oirl C'lly mid W'nlanae
K U. HMITH.
ays on Hand. Young Pigs, Poul
Eggs, Fresh Butter and Cheese.
im Wo Meat Co.,
n'g Street Muket. , Tel. 288
' YOUNC TIM. Manager.
he Encore Saloon
Try a drink at the new place and
,ve MIKE PATTON serve you.
iCOR. HOTEL and NUUANU.
inufactured from pure distilled wa
iCJ Delivered to any part of city by
fill iCE AND ELECTRIC CO.,
Delivered to residences
and offices at 25o per
hundred in 10-lb. lots
W. O. DARNHART,
133 Merchant St
in town the
OF ALL KINDS.
DEALERS IK LUMBER.
ALLEN & ROBINSON.
ten Street :: :: :: Honolulu.
Pfcinips & Co.
fholetale Importer and Jobber!
AMERICAN CRY GOODS.
FORT and Cl't'CX ST3.
amboo Furniture Made to Order,
ctura Framing a Specialty.
8 563 S.
:OjOLULU IRON WORKS
Improved and Modern SUGAR MA
UNERY of every capacity and de
rip t ion made to order. Boiler work
id'BIVITED PIPES for irrigation
irpbses a specialty. Particular at
ntion paid to JOB WORK, and re
in executed at shortest notice.
i,n AND OTHKH PIAN08.
T,h A Y E .1 PIANO CO.
US HOTEL HTflKBT.
Woven Wire Mattresses repaired at
the Factory Honolulu Wire lied
Co., 12C0 Alapal St. Telephone
Yee Sing Kee--Plumber and Tinsmith.
Smith St., bet. Hotel and Pauahl.
Bulletin Business Office Phone 256.
'Bulletin Editorial Room Phoiis 185!
, Is the time to begin saving.
Many who have recently
begun to save have very sub
stantial accounts with us,
drawing interest at the rate
f Ws per cent ayear.
You could do as well. A
year's saving of odd dimes
and nickels would give you a
start in life.
Bank of Hawaii, Ltd.,
Cor. Fort and Merchant Sts.
Capital & Surplus $1,000,000.
Furniture, Iron Beds,
Coyne Farnitnre Co.,
BISHOP STREET. HONOLULU.
Chas. R. Frazier
fhone 371. 122 King St
BENNY & CO., Ltd.,
AGENTS FOR THE
1260 Fort St.
CALL AND HEAR IT
BERGSTROM MUSIC Co., Ltd.
For Beautiful Millinery
BOSTON BUILDING, FORT STREET.
C. Q. YEE HOP & CO.
SHIPPERS and FAMILY
P. H. BURNETTE
Cora'r. of Deeds for California and
New York; NOTARY PUBLIC;
Grant Marriage Licenses; Draws
Mortgages, Deeds, Bills of Sale,
Leases, Wills, Etc. Attorney for the
District Courts. 79 MERCHANT ST.
HONOLULU; PHONE 310.
185 editorial rooms 250 hue
neit office. These are the telephone
numbers of the Bulletin office.
MM ! t
I Natural Gas f
B MARY f
t (Jopyrltlited, ltd, by Associated
T Literary Praia.
Mr. Samuel Perkins, assisted by two
Italians, nil with their coats end vests
oft and perspiring profusely, wn hor
Ing mi artesian well on hit farm.
Suddenly tbe drill was forced out of
the ground. There followed n great
puff of vapor that had' the odor of bad
eggs nnd sulphur mixed together. Mr.
l'erklns had struck a natural Ran well.
A month later Mrs. l'erklns was say
lug to tit tn :
"Samuel, remember that we spell
our umue P-n-r-k-I-n-s; also that n
month hence we sail for Europe.
We'e got money, and we're got a
daughter Miranda. We are going to
give her a chance."
"A chance for what!" asked the hue-
ijaud, who was trying to get used to
wearing a collar a lid a coat around the
"To get polished Up and to marry
some one worthy of her. You needn't
tit there thinking that o few weeks
ago Miranda was banging out the
clothes. We're struck natural gas,
and that makes a difference. , We sail
In four weeks."
"I did kinder tblnk we might go to
Niagara Kails for a week or so" be
gun bii mud as be rubbed his cblu.
"What's Niagara Kails to people wltb
monc) ? Wbat aro they to Miranda!
Samuel 1'arklus, can't you realise that
you siiuck gas?"
"I Lnow I did."
"We are climbing for tbe top of tbe
ladder. We can't be kept down.
Haven't you got It through your head
yctt. It's Europe nnd polish. It's Eu
rope and a busbnnd for Miranda. If
them Chicago butchers can take their
daughters to Europe nnd marry tb'em
off to lords and dukes, why can't we?
"Isn't IiMuiiiI gas J lift us high toned
as pork chops) You keep a coat on
and your shoes black aud get used to
looking like somebody and lcne tbe
rest to mo."
Mr. Parkins would ratber bare sat
on the steps of tbe village and related
for the five hundredth time wbat bis
emotions were wheu be struck gas.
but he was dragged off to Europe.
Miranda betrayed a surprising lack
of Interest, but Mrs. 1'arklus did tbe
thing with at her might. She had na
tive wit and observation, lly sitting
In a corner most of tbe time and' bar1
lug ns little as possible to say the bus
baud and father made out after a fash
ion. In due' time be even became Inter
ested Iu things. He became so Inter
ested that one ewulng after they had
beeu In London for a fortnight be nak
ed his wife:
"Mary, nre we hitting the pike all
"Hitting the pike!" she repeated In
scornful tones. "Samuel, cut tbe pike
and other tilings out. Miranda and me
are watching ourselves every minute,
aud you want to do tbe same. Don't
you leave the spoon Iu tbe cup wben
you drink your coffee, nnd don't tuck
your table napkin clear up under your
cars. If you spoil Miranda's chances
I'll never forgive you."
"I)u t what I want to know is has
any feller come around yet?" persist
ed the husband.
"No, not oxactly. But I've noticed
different ones looking at her and sorter
edging around. You leave that part of
It to us. nnd you tend to yours; When
ever you cau, you Just drop In a word
about natural gas and millions."
"Oh, I won't spoil nobody's chances.
I didn't want to come at first, but
now that I've got over here I raytber
like It. Makes a feller feel as If be
was somebody to have a boy ready at
every turn to brush off bis coat.
"I guess I'd be proud to have a lord
or a duke for sou-ln-law. That's Mi
randa's lowest flgger, hain't it? She
hain't coming over here and then take
up with no hayseed?"
It was, Paris after four weeks In
London, and there was a continual Im
provement In the family. Miranda
aud her mother picked up as much as
one Kreucb word n day, aud the bus
baud aud father left bis fears behind
him and assumed a little swagger nnd
a patroulilug air that sat well ou him.
He bad struck natural gas at home
simply by accident. He reasoned that
he might strike a husband for Miranda
abroad In tbe samo way. Therefore
whenever be came across any one who
wouia listen to blm and who could
apeak I-lhih be Introduced gas wells
Into the conversation.
It was always In the plural. It was
never one gas well, but half a dozen.
He also tried his best to make tbe
head waller understand the gas ques
tion, add If be did not succeed entirely
ho nt least elicited the exclamation:
"Oaa from the ground, moil dleu!
And each well ll.OCO.Ouu! How you
must suffer with so much money!"
"yes, a heap of suffering, but I grit
my teeth uud stand It."
Wheu Mrs. Parkins announced that
they were, to leave Paris for a resort
Iu the Alps, Mr. Parkins bad tils op.
uirtuulty to ask:
"Any feller In sliht jet?"
''Samuel, Hain't you gut no polish In
these Inst two months'" demanded tbe
"Of course I hav e."
"Then show some of It. No gentle
rnnu vuui'd speak hi that brutal man
ner. I'm fli'd Mlru'dn was not here."
"Will, him any I'Td or duke been
Unking up to her?"
"Mnkhi" up! Making up! Humph'!
Mr rorlltm, nre vcu In Diropo or
Te.tns? Sly daughter Miranda cannot
le made up to. I catch your mean
ing, however, and tu order that yoti
may not use any mori' su-h ixm-i-i.
lions let me say that I'm nei unrrr j
"I menu that we nre colug t Suit-1
icrlaud to atop for a mouth or inure nt '
the same hotel with a lord." I
"lly tleorgc. but you don't menu It!" )
exclaimed the husband. "How In
thunder did you bring It about
"Yee, but that's a cute trick of yours.
You'll hae him penned right '
"Samuel Parkins!" cried the n'fe as
she flushed up.
'Oh, well. 1 won't sny nothtiiK more.
You'n Miranda go right abend sad I'll
back you with natural pie enough to
run all Trance. I guess It hain't for
me to mix Iu."
Just how Mrs. Parkins locand the
lord doesn't matter. Tor a llw franc
piece Parisian chambermaids have
been known to locate a whole duke
He wasn't registered as n lord but
that wasn't expected. He v mid be
Incog. Mr. Parkins took It that auv
of the forty men around thi hotel
might be bU lordlhlp, but the nlfe.
with the keener Intuition of ber sex.
spotted tbe right man within twenty
Then Mr. Parktu came to tbe fruit
like n man. He Introduced blin.o'f to
tbe victim and talked of Amerl a and
gas wells and dollars. There on en
thusiasm In hts voire ns he t.i' 'J of
tbe gas that would coutluue i i t:r
out of the earth for rcnturle t mr.
and be worked, up considerable pathos
over the admission that be Udn't
enough wells to supply over hall the
United States. Mr. Parkins had dune
his full share. Tbe rest devolved uiwu
A day or (wo later his lurdihlp
strolled up a mouutaln path by him
self. A little later Mrs. Parkins and
Miranda strolled up the same path
Ills lordship was overtaken Just In
time to rescue Miranda from walking
out on nn overhanging rock that would
bare surely' given way with ber neUht
and dropped her Into tbe valley a nlle
The half fainting girl and the 'bat
tered mother were assisted down the
path to tbe bote), aud Mr. Parkins
found them In bed to recover from the
shock. lie heard the1 story and then
rushed downstairs. When bo appeared
bait nn hour later there was a bland
smile on his face, and be was rubbing
"Mr. Parkins, what baTC you done?"
asked tbe wife as she sat up In bed.
"Have1 yoa been saying anything to his
"Now, don't' you folks get lato a
sweat about me." replied Mr. Parkins,
"ilebbe 1 haven't polished up uulte as
fast as you have over here, but I know
when to do the right thing for all
"And you've seen the lord?"
"And talked with blmT'
"I-'or sure. Yes, sir bad quite n talk
"Samuel Parkins, wbat did you
say?" asked tbo wife as she sat up
stralghter nnd a look of fear came Into
"What should I say under tbe cir
cumstances? I thauked blm from the
bottom of my heart for savlug Miran
da's life. You don't think I spoke
about the weather, do ou?"
"Aud what else. Samuel?"
"What els.-, pa?".
"I offered hi in 125 In cold cash."
Two shrieks shrieked out In chorus,
and two females went Into mild hys
terics, only Miranda's was suspiciously
like laughter, while ber mother's was
tbe real thing. It was n long minute.
that Mr. Parkins stood tbere, bauds Iu
pockets nnd wundcrlug what bad hap
pened. Then his wife forced back ber
emotions nnd fulntly utked;
"And he took It nnd said. Thank
Two days later as they sat In the
train bound for borne Mr. Parklus no
ticed a tear stealing down Mrs. Pur
kln' chtek. He turned to her and
"Ain't you feeling chipper today?"
"Chipper! Chipper! How could 1
feet chipper?" exclaimed Mrs. Parkins
Iu fierce tones.
"Duiino. but you mustn't blame me.
I didn't know that he was a lord thut
went about aavlug human lives for
cash on the nail!' And. anyway, M.
ronda kin marry Joahua ttuwllns to
borne. He writes to me that he's going
tu give up fanning because he's struck
Aud Miranda squeezed bis band and
whispered, "You do everything Just
Th. F.cstl.us 8uburbanlts.
The second story rnnu had climbed
Into tbo front window of tbe facetious
suburbanites villa aud was engaged
In riaiug tbe latttr'a pockets of such
random possessions as were to be
"Ah, good evening, my friend," said
too rncetious suburbanite from the
depths of his bedclothes. "Aren't you
"We can't help It In our business.
governor," replied tho burglar. "We
alu't got no reg'larly organized hours
of work. It's to do while you cau
with us, day nnd night."
"That's a ubamel" said tbe facetious
suburbanite. "You ought to get to
gether aud form a burglars' union for
your own protection,"
"We ain't a trade," retorted tbo bur
glar scornfully. "We're an Industry."
'Then you should be Incoriwratcd
Into the steal trust," said tbe facetious
Whereupon tbe midnight marauder
laughed so long aud loud that be was
overheard by the pollccuiau ou tho
(or nor, who. rycogulilug the laugh, Im
mediately tied to place of safety.
Removed by Lydia E. Pink
bam'sVegctableCompound South Bend. I nil " I.vdla K. Pink.
hnra's Vegetable Compound removed j
u vjnb luuiur UI
four years' growth,
which three of tht
best h)plrlutis de
clared I had. The)
said that only an
help me. 1 am vcrj
a friend's advice
and took I.ydia K.
for It has made me
a stroiic and well
woman, and I shall recommend It as
long' as I live" Mi. May Fiiv,
One of the greatest triumphs of
Lydla K. I'iiikhnm's Vegetable Com-
loutui is me conquering oi woman's
Iread enemy- tumor. If Ton have
mysterious pains liillaimnatlon.ulcera.
Hon or UlnpUii-mcut, don't wait for
time to conllrui your fenrs and go
through the horrorsof a hospital opera
tion, but try Lydla K. l'lnkliam's vege
table Compound at once.
For thirty years Lydla E. I'lnkhaniS
Vegetable Compound, made from roots
fur female Ills, aud such unquestion
able testimony ns the above proves the
value of this famous remedy, and
should givo conlldeuce and hope, to
every sick woman.
If you would lllto Hpeclnl ndvice
about your ense write n confiden
tial letter to Sir. Plnklmtn, ut
Lynn. Alans. Her ndvlco In free,
and always helpful.
Week May 10th.
THE POPULAR FAVORITES
Presenting a Repertoire of the Latest
"Shadows of New
"THE AMERICAN GIRL."
Children under ten, 10 cents;
adults, 25 cents to any part of the
Monday and Tuesday,
Evening prices, 25c, SOc, 75c.
Seats now on sale for all perform
ancei. ART THEATER
The Lady or the Tigci
Change of program three times a
week Monday, Wednesday and
Fort Street and Chaplain Lane
Open Air Moving
Not an ill-smelling closed auditorium.
ADMISSION 10 and 15 CTS.
Children 5 Cents
The New Open-Air Theatre.
LATEST MOVING PICTURES
Two entrances: Pauahi St. near
King Street. Ewa of Fishmarket.
DRY O00DS AND FURNISHING
GOODS of EVERY DE-
the Bulletin Qffis.
care's on sals at
VKj v, -am
Advertisements Under this Heading
On. Cent Per Word Each Day. No Ad
vertisements Inserted for Less Than
Wanted Strictly hlgh-iluns sales
man to sell the most popular lino
of Art Calendars for Advertising,
manufactured by the mmi success
ful Calendar Company In the Pull
ed States. Liberal umtraet.
Ohe nge. experience nnd refer
ences. Tho Oerlach-llarklow Co ,
130!) Mn 12.-13. 11, 16. 17.
Uy n commercial Ihiiiho, u flrst-clasi
bookkeeper, for u iHirinaticnt, re
nionble irfisltlon. Address A. Y
A few customers nearby for pure
milk from u small herd of healthy,
well-led cows. Apply 1837 Col- !
Everybody to tnuke money by plant
ing cocoanuts. Inquire for plants,
Uox 102 Llhuc, Kauai. 41S0.tr
Drhlng hoi so for Its keep, for 2 or
three mouths, Address K., lllllle
Clean wiping rags at tb Uulletln of
fice. SITUATION WANTED
Uy a oung lady, ikihUIoii In otllce, or
clerical work of any kind. Good ref
erences. Address (1. 1).. Uulletln
BOARD AND ROOM WANTED.
(IikmI board uud ii.om for man nnd
wife aud 7-enr-old-chlld--In re
filled family. State price uud lo
cation. Address I). It., this office.
A Knight Templar chnrm, bearing
name of It. W Emmons, Reward
if returned to Uulletln otllce.
A fine GEHMAN VIOLIN, Stradlvar-
ious pattern, has been used many
years, For particulars address E.
KAIIL, German School und Church.
20,000 Cocoanuts Just arrived on
Bchconer Concord, from Fanning
Island. Miller Salvage Co. P. O.
llox G27. 4285-tf
Chicken houses and quantity of jioul
try wire. M. V., Uulletln. 407-31
A full line of the best pa
per for all kinds of newspa
per and job work.
in great variety. We have
also a big supply of good,
Hawaiian News Co.,
PIONEER PAPER HOUSE.
M. A. Gunst &, Co.
FORT AND KINO STREETS.
OFFICE I!OU!tS--A. M.: 8:30 to
10:30 (Saturday and Sunday except
ed); Sunday, 9:30 tu 11:30. P. M.:
7 to 8; Saturday, 2 to 3 nnd 7 to 8.
At Government Dispensary, 1:30 to
3.30 p. m, (Saturday excepted); Sat
urday, 9 to 10 a. m.
WAH CHONG CO.
DRY GOODS AND TAILORING.
Everything absolutely, new and
fresh from the Coast.
WAVERLEY BLK. HOTEL ST.
VTrivTauTv a TTfttu-pTi
VEGETABLE and FLOWER
Mrs. E.M. TAYLOR
THE FLORIST, HOTEL Y0UN0 Bid,
Illnuk books of all sorts, ledgura,
itc. manufactured by thy Uullutl'j
I 'ubllshlng, Company.
Advertltemsnti Under this Heading
One Cent Per Word Each Day. No Ad
vertlssments Inserted for Less Than
At the end of car line on the buach,
furnished house., four ud-nmmv
electric lights. Addnn .s '
11 u 1 1 o 1 1 n oluce
' nirnlohed rooms -- Alo himself . p-
Ing rooms. Apply 2.1C King t .
bet. Alnkla and ltlchnids. 4:100 tf
1 Well-furulshed housekeeping rooms.
I fine view. Apply 70C Quarry St.
Two furnished rooms. 1071A I.lke
l like St., near Campbell Lane.
To furnished rooms. Apply Mrs.
D. McConnell. 1223 Emma St.
, Kurnlklivd cottage In town Inqulie
.Cottage Orove. Phone I0S7
Furnished cottage on Wnlkll.l beach.
Address S., lllllletln. ISUS-tf.
Real Elate Ethange
For Golf and Good Living
St. Clair Bidgood, Manager,
Does your- typewriter or phono-
fph need repairing? Do you want
t " one nBnt by a nuin who un-
deritands his business and has no
typewriter agency, and therefore
' needs show no favor to any one make
I of "whine? Then call un O. L.
lenoRD. Phone G88. 102 Hotel St.
Wo have for sale--Hack Set Itanges.
I klii i in 'I ri llrlrice & Ileach
"Superior Sloven." Clulclc Meal
und Perfection oil stoves; Farm
er's llrollurs, Camp and Laundry
Moves. Phone 211 EMMELUTH
& CO., LTD., 146 King, 3t,
BBS . SH