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THE INDIANAPOLIS DAILY SENTINEL SUNDAY MORNING, APRIL 5, 1885. 11 JfOT ATI It not lot hen our hip go down Thit'n freighted with. ho tud launched with Cre, Aod watched with pride they Miled away VTLeo the wm smooth od th wind wa f4r. And looked for Ion when they tme not Kin, But were wrecked for out on the titlowy main. All i wot loot; we may tend out m- re That will weather the gule till the storms be And with clors flyin od it crfurled Will f IUoUy teer inf pTt at Ut; And their coming at length will urely repay The anxivua watching and weary delay. All i" not lout when our best laid ehernes 8ud Jenly crumble and turn to decay; When we build our flnnn on the eluding eands And tbe tidra cue in and wh them jr. If our plan are unwis and we se them collapse, We will build with more prudence next time, perhape. All U not loet when we bear out our dead. Under the aod in their coffins lie, Thn aadly return to our desolate home To weep and to mourn a the days go by And we miae the sound of their coining feet And Iwlcn do more for their Toices swtet. All ot loet, for to u they yet life; We know that enrtu'a farewells, though bitter, are brief; In flod's good time we hall clasp them ac;ain In a laad unshadowed hy care and grief; For earthward they look, and atand and wait To welcome cs in through the heavenly gate. Eat nat then in despair that all i- lost When the faireet hopes of life fade away; Think not lae bright fiaicns that dawc on as here Are but mocking mirag- to lure us astray. There are tongs in the nicht, and a golden ray T light up the gloom of the darkest day -fMra. M. S. Offutt. dlnn Custom or UiftOInklng. (.Louisrille Courier-Journ.tl. Id modern times every conceivable oc casion is grasped by some gift-making llolidaje, birthdays, wedding anniver saries, promotions, election to office, de partures, and most everything else must be celebrated this way, and it is tbi3 which baa made the custom an odious one. A gentleman wan talking on tbe sub ject a few day ago. "Do you know," said he, "that many a man in this city has been compelled at times to rob hi family of some needed comfort in order to keep up with his fellow-eaployes in gift-making? Well, it is a fact, and to say the least of it, a ahemeful one. A dozen men are em ployed in a store, and some event in the fife of their employer makes recognition and remembrance on their part essential not justly so, but still they must not appear picayuniab, and a present is de cided upon, and each fellow assessed enough to make in the aggregate the sum required to purchase it. Some cf these men have families which they find it a hard matter, on small aljirien, to provide for. These $2 or $3 or $5 taken from their purses are needed at home, doubt less, but still they have to give it up to pamper to a foolish, aye, criminal cus tom, or be called niggardly and maybe, if their 'stinginess' becomes known to their employer, incur his displeasure and lose their places." "Do you tbiiik any man would be mean enough t discharge an employe because he refrsed to rob his children for such a purpose?' Da I? Well, I should think so. I know of instances -here men have been given to understand that they were ex pected to contribute, and, failing, would have to look for work elsewhere. I". is this system of robbery which has made gift-inaking so pernicious. The worst feature is that it is growing steadily, un til now some men can scarce turn around without expecting some oDetogive them BOEiething HAT MAULS A GOOD WO. MAX. sali: Seautj Not an Unmixed Advantage Tests or Temper and Tact. "Do you have many applications for vTork from saleswomen?" asked a reporter of the manager of a large up-town store. "We can get all we need at ghort no tice," he replied. "Most of the ladies iike to hail from a large concern like ours. But it U not easy to fiud many who are fully up to our standard." "What is the standard?" "The question is not easy to answer. We expect a lady to? be quiet, yet confi dent; alert and wide awake, yet polite and agreeable; easy and frank, yet pos sessing a touch of firmness, and not so outspoken as to injure trade. In fact, a good saleslady h rather a complex arti cle under a simple exterior. Patience and coolness are among the best points Iney can possess. 1 sometimes feel oblip ed in a doubtful case, to test an appli cant upon this point of equanimity by iryiug nur- eucct oi some nttie aggravat ing remark. If she remains cool and pleasant, her chances are good'; if she colon aud bites her lips, I am farced to regard her as inexperienced, and put her in Mome simple department hosiery, for example. Une of the instincts that an inexperienced girl has to contend with is the tendency to stiffen up if a custom er becomes a little disagreeable. But I could pick out a good saleslady much more easily man l can describe her. "Is beauty a desirable iint?" "On the whole I think its importance is overrated, l should prefer, from a bus iness point of view, what is called anal tractive girl, who is graceful and has a lair figure. Many of our best salesladies are not remarkable for physical charms, though all are agreeable in manner. Some houses make a point of beauty. It is thought to 1 useful at counters fre quented by gentlemen; but we have often been obliged to duplace salesladies for keeping gentlemen in conversation. The trtiatosay just enough to effect eales and dispose of the customer w the hen business commences to degenerate into cnatter. "Beauties are hard to take care of; we often have to 'call' them, that is, send them on a message to. a distant part of the establishment as a hint. I think it quite possible that large sales at high profits are made in the departments of men's furnishing goods by having good looking girls behind the showcases. Nev ertheless, I do not think that, as a whole, we consider the value of a pretty girl, in the wages market, to be greater than that of a plainer girl who is as attractive in other rect. Wo do not pay more for beauty unless it is combined with other high qunlities. "In tle cloak and other tryirg on de partment! personal ch;rnis are of great vnlur, of courie, and command high wages; but even here it is u:re a matter f figure and gleeful movement than of face. It is perhaps advantageous to have handsome, refined-looking girls in the bee and embroidery departments. In the silk and trimming departments we re quire god tate, a faculty for nice drap ing and a quick eye for colors, united with a genius for matching fabric. We pay well in these departments, and in se lecting Indie for them gKl looks have only a secondary place. Some of the ladies, as you will notice, are quite plain, 1 but all are nice looking. "Women perfectly suitable for the trimmed-hat department are certainly born, not made. I assure von that few of the fine arts rc more difficult than that of selling ladies' hats. The hat, w ith their velvets, silks, laces, flowers, feath ers, and passementeries, are verv com- piex arucies. loceaoie to cnoose me i 'f i . . particular one from stock that is most suitable and becoming to a ruistomer'a features, complexion, age, and style re quires natural gifts of a high order. Ladies are ahvavs studying dress more or less, but the number who can trim a hat tactefully, and who know what is most becoming to them, is small. Ihey feel this, and although they are often very opinionated in other matters of dres, they are quite apt to depend much upon any saleslady in tins oepartnient whom they believe to be really compe tent. Hence the need of the best talent here, and, as the best talent i always in demand, the price for it are hipb." " hv do thev object to being cahed sales-women?" "I don't know." Marriage. Men and women, says Theodcre Pavl er, and especially young people, do noi know that it takes years to marry com pletely two hearts, even of the most lov ing and well sorted. But nature allow no sudden change. We slope very gradu ally from the cradel to the summit oi life. Marriage is gradual, a fraction ol us at a time. A happy wedlock its a long falling in love. I know young persons think love belongs only to brown hair and plump, round crimson cheeks. So it does for it beginning, just as Motfnt Washington begins at Boston Bay. But the golden marriage is a part of love (which the br dal day knows nothing of. Youth is the tassel and silken flower of love, age is the full corn, ripe and sol id in the ear. Beautiful is the morning of love with its prophetic crimson, violet, purple and gold, with its hopes of days that are to come. Beautiful also is the evening of lore, with its glad remem brances, and its rainbow side turned to ward heaven as well as earth. Young people marry their opposites in temper and general character, and sucii a marriage is generally a good one. They do it instinctively. " The young man does not say, "My black eye require to be wed to blue, and my overvehemeace requires to be a little modified with some what of lullness and reserve." Wlien those opposites come together to be wed, they do not know it, but each thinks the other just like himself. Old people never marry their opposites, they marry their similarsand from calcu lation. Each of these two arrangements is very proper. In their long journey these opposites will fall out of the way a great many times, aud both will charm the other back again, and by and by they will agree as to the place they will go to, and -the road they will go by and become reconciled. The man will be nobler and larger for leing associated with so much humanity unlike himself, and she will be a nobler woman for Having manhood be side her, that seeks to correct her defi ciencies and supply hei with what she lacks.if the diversity is not too great, and there be real pity aud love in their hearts to begin with. The old bridegroom, having a much shorter journey to make, must associate himself with one like himself. A perfect and complete marriage is, perhaps, as perfect personal beauty. Men and wo men are married fractionally now a mall fraction, and then a large fraction. Very few are married totally, and they only, I think, after some forty or fifty years of gradual approach and excite ment. Such a large and sweet fruit is a complete marriage that it needs a winter to mellow and season. But a real hap py marriage of love and judgment be tween a man and woman is one of the things so very handsome that if the sun were, as the Greek poets fabled, a God, he might stop the world in order to feast hb eyes with such a spectacle. The Ban and Vegetable Ltf. From an acorn weighing only a few grains a tree will grow, for a hundred years or more, not only throwing od many pounds of leaves every year, but itself weighing several ton9. If an orange twig ia put in a large box of earth, and that earth weighed, when the twig be comes a tree, bearing luscious fruit, there will be vary nearly the same quantity of earth. From careful experiments made by dißerent scientific men, it is an ascer tained fact that a very large part of the growth of a tree is derived from the sun, from the air, and from the water, and a very little from the earth; and notably all vegeiation becomes sickly unless it is r i 1 . a! 1 ! T 1 ireeiy exposeu to me sunsmue. ooa and coal are but condensed sunshine, which contains three important elements, all equally essential to both vegetable and animal life magnesia is important to any of tbe tissues. Thus it is that the more persons are out of doors the more healthy they are, and the longer they live. Every human being ought to have an hour or two of sunshine at noon in the winter, and ia tht early forenoon in rummer. A QCLKT FOU A 1IKAIIT. 1 looked forth from my inmost a!f, And a4-arrhi !h- norld thr upliout; 'My life," I cried, 'for rr.e trut- Iart, To a ear ty w ithoLt doubt!" I looked again, and lookrd in Tain, No heart fx to twine; 'Sc- nt ntjt.i(.,, a r u v r plied, "For hart to an-wf-r thin-." I looked within, rnd nif mire own. So clo-4 thnt Iw.fh f'-m.d one, I found the hfirt nnd tii re it lies; "TU J"'Mr- M or. l, .r, irne. A Kad Life. Foolish girls who, dazzled by the glare of the footlights, are hankering to appear on the stage, should read and digest these confessions ol Mis Maggie Mitchell, a successful artist, written for the North American Review: It would be bold for me to pretend to descry the chances of success for the ac tress, of the future. It 13 a lottery this profession of ours, in which even th prizs are, after all not very considerable. My own days, spent most of them far from my children and the comforts oi delight of my home, are full of exhaust ing labor. Ilehearsal and other business occupy me from early morning to the hour of performance, with brief intervals for rest and food and a little sleep. In the best hotels my time is so invad ed that I can scarcely live comfortably. much Ies luxuriously. At the worst, existence becomes a torment and a bur den. I am the enger yet weary slave of my profession, and the best it can do for me who am fortunate enough to be in cluded among its successful members ii to barely palliate the fuffering of a forty weekV exile from my own houst and my family. For those of our calling who have to make this weary round, year aftpr year, with disappointed ambitions and defeat ed hopes as their inseparable company, I can feel from the bottom of my heart. Rich season makes the life harder and drearier; each year robs it of one more prospect, one more chance, one more op- 1)ortunity to try and catch the fleeting nibble in another field. tVbj Men Don't Wear finer Clothes. I New York I'ost. The reformers who have been endeav oring for a number of years to induce men to clothe themselves in more pic turesque garments have made little headway, evidently because they have overlooked the economic relation between male and female costume. All economists know that there is only a given amount of capital in the world at any given time which can be used by the two sexes at what they call the clothes fund; and that the more of this there is used by one sex the less there is left for the other. In early times, when men were stronger than women, and made use of their strength in their own interest, they took the greater part of this fund and spent it upon themselves, which accounts for the fact of the splen dor of male attire among so many primi tive races, and for the eclusion in which the women were kept much lavish expenditure in "shopping" being thus prevented. In our day, on the contrary, the progress made by women in establishing an independent position for themselves is seen in their getting the lion's share of the clothes fund, just as it is elsewhere. For the last two centuries every step in the advance of women in getting then lights has beeu marked by a correspond ing decline in the dress of men, until knee breeches, slashed doublets, jewelry, wigs and lace have all been discarded, while that share of the fund formerly devoted to thee goes into the dress of women. What reformers ought to advocate is, first of all, the reeubjectio:: of woman, her relegation to her old position. This, however, involves a general uprising by men, for which they chow no evidence of being ripe. TELLING KVIi:ieSC ltl ITIO.S. What the Mall Agent Lrarnw of Let tern That Go Through Iii HaiicIm. (Grand Rapids iH mocratJ. "If ycu want a position to study hu man nature without seeing the person," aid George W. Stanton, Jr., a mail igent, "you can find it in the railway postal. service. The letters that a man writes are nearly always characteristic of his description, and there are as many kinds of letters as there are dispositions. The careful, painstaking student writes a superscription for of course that is all I have to deal with in letters painfully plain with all the requisite shading of the Spencerian style. The clerk in a hur ry to get off the mail combines a good business hand with so much haste that it is impossible to distinguish his Iowa from Ind. Although the letters of per sons not used to writing them are ad Iressed in a cramped, uneven hand, yet hey are generally plain to read, aud if heir spelling is not -too bad their des tination is easily surmised. The square tinted and perfumed envelopes which tf.vell up Monday's mail are in a delicate Uttle'hand but always easy to read. "Every few mails we get from New York contain what is known as the "Dutch brig." It's a batch of foreign letters generally directed to the settlers up in the north woods. That is a picnic for us poor fellows. Some of the names are regular jaw-breakers, but of course stations are all that bother me, but what ever elfe is on the letter, 'J?tat Michigan, Nord Amerika,' is inrariably somewhere on the envelope. There are generally five or six lines of superscription. "The letters which come from the Rist are evenly and plainly written, as if the sender had leisure; but the Western let ters, while the writing is just as good a? that up$n the Eastern letters, looks as if the superscription had been written while ready to take a train. Western people showa hurry in everything about their letters. Bothersome abbreviations are common, as if there was no time to write out the full name. In sorting mail in the car haste is imperative, and very ften a letter is u badly addressed that all I can do is to lay it aside until I've got time to lie down" and study, and try to make something out of nothing." "Ho about the amount of mail on different days. It varies considerably, don't it?" aked the reporter. "Uli yes, Monday is the heaviest letter day and Wednesday generally the light est, t rulay and fcaturdav trive the heav iest commercial n ails. ' The Monday morning mail is social correspondence to a great extent and it is wonderful how it will vary with the weather. A bright, pleasant ciunday will make a compara tively light mail on Monday morning, as people don't stay at home and don't get time to write letters. But U t the Sun day be a rainy, disagreeable day and it seems as if the w hole populace spent the day writing to friends. "People write more letters in the fall and winter than they do in the summer the spring is the lightest reason. Many more papers arecirculated in winter than in summer, as jeople have more time to read. Corresjondents are tired then, you know. v '"There is lot3 of fun too in the busi ness if it is hard work. It's rather amus ?ng to watch the regularity which corres pondents often show. I don't notice it in the mails from larger places, but up the road where nly a few letters come on the train I catch on to lots of rackets. There is a fellow up north at a siding who always brings bis mail and puis it on the train. Why I can Kt my watch by that fellow. It's only a short time since he commenced to send w ith sucl: regularity and when he hands the lettei in to me he gives a wink and a small smile. The letter goes to a girl on the Central and the regularity with which the replies come back is a fair omen, I should think, although not much if a judge myself, that something was going to happen before long." A Proper flat. Chicago Interior.) When we come to marriage as an ele ment of happiness, we arrive at what some consider as the proper object of life's journey. In looking at the window of a jeweller, the reader may have seen a figure of Cupid with a bunch of wedding rings, and as he looked, he may have specu lated on the future lot of those who were to wear them. Were the loving bonds they typified to be dissolved pre maturely by death, broken in a court of aw, or were they to issue in a golden wedding, after fifty years of a happy life? The answer is given to such an enquiry in the following story. A lady on the eve of her wedding day, had a curious dream. She saw on a ta ble, some bunches of wedding rings. Various persons made their selections from these bunches. One bunch repre sented rings taken by those who married from thoughtlessness, another, rings se lected by those who married from pride; a third, rings chosen by those who mar ried for money; a fourth, rings picked out by those who married from princi ple and true affection. Then the figure of Time appeared on the scene: as he touched one bunch of rings, they were found only to be copper. Another hunch changed iuto curling vipers, and it was only the rings which had been selected from esteem and affection, that atood the test, and proved to be pure gold. At a wedding at which we were pre ent, when the health of the bride and bridegroom was proposed, and they wer about to start on the hymeneal tour, the young couple were compared by a speak er to a shallop with gay streamers, im patieut to be liberated from its moorings and sail onwards on the mystical voyage of life. "Examine carofuliy," so spoke in effect our friend, "examine carefully the company you are going to take with you in your boat. Here comes Beauty; a place for her smiling face by all means. A place for Love? Yes, and one of the 6et. Another and a good one for Health. Make room, too, for Thrift and Prudence. Let Culture, also, that lady with the stately step, be admitted if she wish. Above all, keep a good place for Sweet Temper, and the best in the boat for Piety and Principle. That haughty dame, Self will, with the last word in her mouth, we cannot admit, on any consideration. We do not object to Dame Money. Her parcel is not a large one, and it can be added to on the voy age. Nor will we exclude these two good-natured animals 'Bear and For bear.' With these companions in the boat, and God's blessing and his sacred word to direct you, we do not doubt that vour voyage will be a pleasant one." Ve cordially endorse our friend's words, and recommend them as our advice "to those about to marry," instead oi the well-known mcnosvllabic counset 'Don't." ' 1'he Power of Daniel Websler' Caie, Letter in Is'ew York Tost. "One Suuday a student from Andover occupied the pulpit, my father not in tending to take any part in the exercises. The young minister got along very well with the opening prayer and the Scripture lesson, but when he had read only a verse or two of the hymn he be came confused, stammered, and at last his voice failed him entirely. As he seemed to be taken suddenly ill my father finished the service, preaching an extemporaneous discourse. On the way home in the carriage the youug man, who by that time had quite revived, being pressed for an explanation concerning his conduct, finally confessed: 'Well, sir, it was merely an unaccount able nervousness. Just as I was reading the second stanza of the hymn a gentle man came into the church and eat down in a broad-aisle pew directly before me, fixing such great staring black eyes upon me that I was frightened out of my wits!' Uutil he was then told he did not know that Daniel Webster was a member of the congregation or an inhabitant of the town." Tili: DREAM IIIMi. Oft in the summer twilight hours I ait and in my arm 1 hol.i A little chiM, who-- rye are blue; Whose hair is funny sd. lie look up lovirply at me, I look down lovingly f.n him, Jkn.l with ?vreet tears of happiness, 1 feel my fight grow dun. The child is like my life'a het gift, He has the selfsame notle fce; la every gejtiire, every mile, A likeness, too, I traöe. And thi would make him-dearer tili, It auht so dear could dearer he, I think a on his fragraut mouth 1 kiss him tenderly. But, ah! as fades the light, so fade The eyes, the smile, the shinin? hair, I have hut dreamed; the night brings truth I elap the empty air; And mem'ry coming back repeats; "Alas! to thre no little one Savs 'mother.'" And I strive to say: "Dear Lord, Thy will be done!" Margaret Eytinge. OLD MRS. BRAY'S STORY. When my son Gregory married Mi? Morrison, I gave him a piece of my mind and told him I didn't care if I never saw him a$;ain. Why? Oh, well, I didn't like her; she wasn't the sort of girl I'd have chosen. I'd never seen her, hut I knew she wasn't, a flighty young thing, just out of boarding school; couldn't make a shirt or a loaf of bread; and there was Miss Fish, a very plain girl, I must allow, but so good a splendid housekeeper, aud all that. I always liked Almira Fih; and Gregory to go marry Fanny Morris-m! Well, asl said, I told him what I thought of him and of her, and the boy showed bis tamper, and or iix month I never saw him. I bore it as long as I could, but a moth er must be a fool about her only boy; so one day, ashe wouldn't come to me, went to him, as the rascal knew I would. I went to his otfice, and I walked up to his desk, and I was going to scold him, but something came over me that made me choke to keep the tears back, and be fore I knew it we had kissed and made friend1?. "And now you'll go and see Fanny," said he, "and I'll find you there when I come home at night;" and after a little coaxing I said I would go;and more than that, Iwent. The houe was a cunning little place, a mile or two out of town; and I must say it was very neat outside. I rang the bell; it ehone as it ought to, and before it stopped tinkling some one opened the door. It was a pretty young woman in a blue chintz wrapper, and when I asked her if Mrs. Gregory Bray was at home she answered, "Yes; that is my name. I've been ex pectin? you an age, but better late than never." 'IIw did you know I was coming?" I asked, puzzled to gue?. how the knew me, for we h id never met before. "Oh, I didn't know," eaid she. "In deed, I made up my mind you wouldn't; but it' a long way out here, I know. Come right upstairs. Miss Jones was here vesterdav to cut and haste, but we'll find it as much as we can do to do the trimming between us." "Cool," I thought. Then I said, "I suppose you are having a dress made?" "A suit," said she; "skirt, overskirt, basque, and ddman. I do hope you make nice buttonholes." "i should hope I did," said I. should he ashamed of myself if "1 I couldn't." "So many can't," said she; "but I told Miss Jones to send me an experienced hand, and she said thnt there was no bet ter than Mrs. Switzer." Now I began to understand. My daughter-in-law took me for a seamstress she expected, and if ever a woman had a chance, I had one now. Not a word did I say. Only 1 wondered whether seamstresses generally catne to work in black gro-igraiu silk and a cashmere shawl; and I sat down in the rocking chair she gave me and went to work with a will. I can sew with any one, and as for buttonholes but this is not mv m story. She was a pretty girl, that daughter-in-law of mine,and very chattv and socia ble. I talked of this'and I talked of thai, but not a word did she say of her mother in-law. I spoke of people I had known who hud had qunrrels with rela tions, but she did not tell me that her bus baud's mother had quarreled with him. At last I spoke ritiht out about moth ers in-law, and said I, "As a general thing, mothers-in-law and daughters in-hw don't agree." Said fhe, "That's a very wrong 6tate of things." "Well," said I, "I suppose it is, but bow do you account for it?" "I suppose young people are selfish when they are first in love," said she, "and forget old people's feelings." It .was an answer I didn't expect. "It is plain you are friendly with your mother-in-law," paid I. "I'm sure I should be if I'd ever seen her," said she. "Oh! then I've been misinformed," paid I. "I was told I forget by whom thai Mr. Gregory Bray was the son of tbe Mrs. Bray who lives on Street. "That is perfectly true," said she, "but nevertheless we've never met." "ilow singular!" said I. "I suppose it is old Mrs. Bray's fault. I've heard she was a very queer old lady." "You haven't heard the truth, then," said my daughter-iul-aw. "My hus band's mother is a very fine woman in every respect. But when my husband told her suddenly that he was going to marry a girl she never saw, she was naturally startled, and she said some things about me, knowing I was fresh from boardiDg-school,and no housekeeper that offended Gregory, and so there has been an estrangement. I think my dear husband a little to blame, and I've urged him a dozen times to go aud pee her. He's very found of her, and thinks no one like her in many things; but bi temper is up, and it will take time to cool it. Meanwhile. I feel quite sure if she knew me, she'd like me better. Per haps that is a piece of vanity, but I should try to make her, you know, and I won't fall into absurd superstitions that a woman must hüte her mother in-law. I mean to love mine some day. I can't remember my own mother, and Gregory certainly would seem to ' come next to her. Now you have the story, Mrs. öwitzer." "I'm sure it does you credit," said I; "and the old ladv ought to be ohamed vf herself." I wanted to get up and kiss my daughter-in-law there and then, but that would have spoiled my fun. So after that I sewed hard and did not say much, and together we finished the pretty silk dress, and had it just finished, when the sound of a key in the door caught both zur ears. "That is my husband," said my daugh-ter-in law; and I knew it was Gregory, Up stairs he came, two steps at a time, opened the door and l(Mked at us with a blight smile on his face. "This is as it should be," said he. "Fan ny, I shall kiss mother fir?t, this time." And he put bis arms around us both. BJt Fanny gave a little scream. "Oh! Gregory," she cried, "what are you about? This is Mrs. Switzer, who is making my dress. At least, I I have thcMght so all day." For, you see, I bad burt out laughing, and had kissed Greg ory back and then kissed her. "My dear," said I, "I've played a little tritt on you, or rather, let you play one on youirelf, but you've turned out as good as gold. I couldn't get you to say. a word iiirainstthe old lady. Iam Gregory's mother, my dear, and yours, too, if you'll call me so." "Indeed I will," Faid the dear girl; ''but I've kept you sewing hard all day. You s?e I expected a Mrs. Switzer, and I" "We've been all the more sociable for that, my dear," I said, "and I am glad it happened. I've been very foolish all this while, and Gregory has chosen a better wife for himself than I could have done." And so I think to this day, for I be lieve thero. never was a better woman born than Gregory's wife, Fanny. THIS COMET. Bill Nye, in Detroit Free Press.J The comet is a kind of astrouomical parody on the planet. Comets look some like planets but they are thinner and do not hurt so hard when they hit anybody as a planet does. The comet was so called because it had hair on it, I be lieve, but late years the bald-headed comet is giving just as good satisfaction everywhere. The characteristic features of the comet are: A nucleus, a nebulous light or coma, and usually a luminous train or tail worn high. Sometimes several tails are observed on one comet, but this occurs only in flush times. When I waä young I used to think I would like to be a comet in the sky, up above the world so high, with nothing to do but loaf around and play with the little new laid planets and have a good time, but now I can see where I was wrong. Comets algo have their troubles, their perihelions, their hyperbolas and their parabolas. A little over 300 years ago Tycho Brahe discoT ered that comets were extraneous to our atmosphere, and since then times have improved. I can see tha trade is steadier and potatoes run lesa to tops than they did before. Soon after that they discovered that comets all had more or less periodicity. Nobody knows bow they got it. Ail the astronomers had been watching them day and night and didn't know when they were exposed, but there was no time to talk and argue over the question. There were two or three hundred comets &!l down with it at once. It was an ex citing time. Comets sometimes live to a great age. This shows that the night air is not so injurious to the health as many people would have us believe. The great comet of 1680 is supposed to have been the one that was noticed about the time of Ctesar'a death, 44 B. C, and still when it appeared in Newton's time, seventeen hundred years after its first grand fare well tour, Ike said that it was very well preserved indeed and seemed to have re tained all its faculties iu good shape. Astronomers say that the tailsof all comets are turned from the un. I do not know why they do this, whether it is etiquette among them or just a mere habit. A late wiiter on astronomy said that the substance of the nebulosity and the tail is of almost inconceivable tenuity. lie said this and then death came to his relief. Another writer says of tbe comet and its tail that "the curvature of the litter and the acceleration of the periodic time in the case of Encke's comet indicate their being affected by a reVi?ting medium which has never been observed to have the slightest influence on the planetary reriods. I do not fully agree with the eminent authority, though he may be right. Much fear has been the result of the comet's appearance ever since the world began, and it is as good a thing to worry about as any thing I know of. If we could get close to a comet without frightening it away, we would find that we could walk through it any where a3 we could through the glare of a torchlight procession. We should so live that we will not be ashamed to look a comet in the eye, however. Let us pay up our newspaper subscription and lead such lives that when the comet striketh we will be ready. Some worry a good deal about the chances for a big comet to plow inio the sun some dark rainy night, and ihui bust up the whole universe, I wish thai was all I had to worry about. If any responsible man will agree to pay my taxes and funeral expenses, I will agree to do his worrying about the comet'l crashing into the bosom of the sun and knocking its daylight out. i