Jobs for Men, or Men for Jobo7
Where Hawaii Led, as Usual.
Our Archivist Leaves Us,
Ismay and Ills Tribe.
Nothing is bo characteristic of tho fortltuJo and enduranco of the Japanese,
say the dispensary nurscB of tho Palama Settlement, as the bearing of tho
little children who como to them for relief. Under tho sverest tests these Httlo
Asahi children bear pain with indifference and a stoicism which 1b the marvel
of physici&nB and nurses.
"There was a little fellow in tho Pohukaina School," the Kakaako uurso
relates, "who camo to school a few weeks ago with 'a big gash in his leg to
which ho was sublimely indifferent. His homo was on Kukul street and I
urged him to go to tho Palama dispensary and have the wound dressed. This
advice ho gnoTcd and as timo wont on tho cut grew worse instead of healing.
A few days ago it was so serious that I took him to a physician and it was then
found that gangreno had set in. Flesh had to bo clipped away, tho wound
cauterized with acid, stitches taken in it and the leg carefully bound up In all
a long ana extremely painful operation. This Httlo .Tapancso lnd never Bhowed
by a tremor or a change of expression tho leaBt sign of fear or pain but watchod
the proceeding with Interest and maTchod away when the operation was finished
as though such treatment was of daily occurrence.
"This same fortitude is shown by tho babies as soon as thoy can walk.
Toungsters two nnd three years old como limping in hero to have splinters removed
from their feet a half inch long and laugh about it, and this same fortitude
is brought out tho more strikingly by tho panic which tho glimpso of a
knife, ncedlo or other implement occasions in tho minds of tho grown-up patients
of other nations."
JX St Jt J J
I seo that it is suggested that Kuhio bo run as tho Republican candidnto
for tho mayoralty and that Bob Shinglo bo given a chance to measure his
political popularity against that of tho Never Missing Link for tho delegate-ship.
Wo could stand having Kuhio for mayor, all Tight, to get rid of .Too
Tern and his funnyisms, if for no other reason, but why tho suggestion of his
candidacyl It will bo noticed that tho proposal comes in this way: "Qivo
Kuhio tho job," It is not suggested by anyone that Honolulu should have
a good mayor and that Kuhio is the man best nblo to give Honolulu good service.
It is not a caso of giving Honolulu anything, but a caso of giving Kuhio
What a good many peoplo would like answered is this: What is tho mayoralty
of Honolulu for, anyhow! Is it provided in order that someono may havo
a fairly well salaried job with no work attached, or is it something established
for tho general benefit of tho community that pays the salary J Of course,
ovcryono who knows tho history of tho Municipal Act knows that tho position
of mayor was created to givo John G. Lane a political reward, but suroly tho
intention is not to koep on paying out good money to dubs of tho Forn order
in the hopo that Lano may ultimately bo elcctcdl If that bo tho caso, it will
bo cheaper to pension Lano right away and abolish tho office, because ho will
never reach it through tho ballot box in a million years. If, on the other hand,
there is a lingering hopo that tho mayor's salary will somo day bo paid to
someono who can earn U and givo tho city a quid pro quo, then cut out tho
"give Kuhio tho placo" talk and let us send tho job out hunting for tho man
who can best fill it and mako of the position something better than an expensive
Tho Shinglo talk for tho delcgateship is no surprise to mo. I ventured
the opinion several months ago that Robert W. was tho man principally engaged
in stoking tho fires under Kuhio and henting him up to the explosion
point against tho Governor, with tho idea in mind that Kuhio could bo mndo
to blow off so much steam that his rcnominntion would become an impossibility.
Then, tho city treasurer, who had "saved tho plantations" from McCandless
in 1910, coul4 claim his reward, gracefully step into Kuhio 's shoes and go to
congress. Nothing has developed to mako mo think my ideas of several months
ago wcro in tho main not correct.
Shinglo is affected with tho samo itch that got Caesar into troublo nnd
concluded in n stato funoral nnd an oration that worries tho Latin class oven
to this date. Ambition, with an upper caso A has spurred Shinglo on and kept
him going along tho upward path until ho has now reached tho slippery crags.
Hero is whero he has to look out. Tho higher ho goes, tho longer tho fall if
he slips, and ho may tnko it from mo that his path to the delcgateship has
been greased. Beforo ho reaches out for moro, ho will havo to stand whoro
he is for a while and take a look about him. If ho docs ho will discover that
there aro quite a lot of other peoplo in Hawaii besides himself.
At any rate, it is about timo to reverse tho political game for a whilo nnd,
instead of distributing the offices around among those who want them, distribute
our men around among tho offices they caH fill to tho best advantago
of tho public.
V J t5 V J
Do you know that tho Homo Rule legislature of Hawaii anticipated Thoo-
doro Roosovelt and the strenuous national insurgents of tho day in ono of their
principal new doctrinest In thnt historic session whorcin tho Cannon Bnll of
Kohala begnn IiIb rolling nnd nearly buBtod tho overworked welkin, a humblo
member introduced a law having to do, I think, with taxes, nnd concluding with
a section destined to secure its place on tho statute books of tho land regardless
of what tho courts might say. "This law," said tho final section of tho brilliant
act in question, "shall not bo declared unconstitutional." This Bcction
wns a beautiful and simple dovice, but it occasioned considerable nmusemont at
tho expense of tho honorablo who fathered it. Now comes a member of congress
with a bill to stop tho Supromo Court of tho United States from declaring laws
unconstitutional, nnd Roosevelt it on tho rampage along tho same linos, while
several American magazines have taken the matter up. Onco again Hawaii la
shown in the lead, That littlo sentence "This law shall not bo declared unconstitutional"
ought to earn a monument for someono.
? O w w w
"As a matter of record ," as Robert C. Lydccker. Esq., might remark.
AhkpIm tve willing bwvtly oh hit wind, but ml m hwvlly thnt wlum lie
lilekeii uji ins .uin!rttj.(iwur bill he roulil Mil eu u iIdIImIu sapor oh m front
h t wt rumJJiuUd the figurei villi whltb lu Iwul lalwiluiuly rlu4
tli rJllui tfpekiHi akoul t (om at which U CMtli) tUke Mi Hit ud mi
allium) IImmu lbl he f tin ml be uuld welly uVw lu wsltfily uf lb "!'!
lUvv" uf Itm big Htiii$i carnival Mtihwui tuHtnMlttitf wtftgay
Mr Iydr b4 wmi in feu life im bu4rii 4 tills r bill, u4 bad mi,
HAWAIIAN GAZETTE, TUESDAY, APRIL 30, 1912 -SEMI WEEKLY.
Indeed, even an idea that u much wealth wa ever confined to such a Html I
area, but he was willing to take the existence of hundred-dollar bills for grant
d. Its at one telephoned to whatever committee was In charge of shipping
Bhrlnera to the Coast and ongaged his reservation.
At last tho ecstatic moment arrived when be could turn over the arehltal
vault to the care of Chief Clerk Mahaulu, lock up tho receipt Prlnco Cupid
gave him for the Kalaknua sllverwaro nnd redeem his reservation with the cold
hard cash represented by hla hundred-dollar bill.
As he left his office, however, he droppod In to drop a tear of farewell on
tho devoted head of hla dear friend, Daid Lloyd Conkllng, the treasurer of
the Territory. A natural pride caused him to exhibit hla bill The treasurer
first squinted at It nnd then he squinted at Robert 0. Then ho spoke words of
wisdom to this effect:
"My dear Robert, with all due regard to .your well-known nnd genulno
attainments along linoa relating to tho musty and antique chronology of these
Hawaiian Islands, I am afrnld that your training for life has been purely
academical. While my heart leaps reeponslvcly at evory sign of inward joy
In my fellowbclnga and while I shudder at the prospect of dampening even
tho slightest indication of that most desirable of all emotions, I feel compelled,
aa between man nnd man, to inform you that this hundred-dollar bill is what
is commonly known bb 'College currency' nnd is used with varying success on
tho stngo to portray tho transfer of tainted wealth from tho pudgy oratorical
hand of tho undcsirablo citizen to tho being Tcnown aa tho ward
As boforo remarked, tho origin of substituted ways and means that
aonds Mr. Lydoekor to tho Coast aro too sacred to print.
J .. J J J
Does it occur to many that tho contempt felt towards J. Bruco Ismay,
bocauso ho escaped tho fatal consequences of the order ho is supposed to havo
given Captnln Smith of tho Titanic to "mako n record," should bo hold in
part in resorvo for minor offenders along tho same linesf Every automobilo
speeder -011 tho streets of this city who drives for timo and imperils tho lives
of those with him in his machino and thoso around him on tho public ways
is as desorving Of contempt and equally culpablo as Ismay. Tho Whlto Star
managing director got into a lifeboat and left innocent passengors to drown.
In Honolulu wo havo automobillsta who havo killed pedestrians and then driven
gaily away to luaus. Wo havo automobillsta who have smashod thoir cars
into peoplo upon tho street and gono on in drunken glco, leaving mangled
bodies to Ho where thoy fell. Every day wo may seo intoxicated persons at
tho wheels of automobiles, their very presence in tho machines being a mennco
to life and limb, potentially Ismays on a small scale.
Ismny if. being hounded becauso ho failed to stay aboard tho Titanic
and face death with tho victims of his company's ordorB nnd among thoso
who hiss his name aro employers Who aro, in a desiro for profit, killing mon
and women by tho score, just as directly as tho desiro of tho White Star owners
for speed killed its sixteen hundred. Tenement owners who fail in thoir duty
towards their tenants and in their failuro condomn scotcb to all tho suffering
of tuberculosis, legislators who drive dirty bargains with politicians
urgent sanitary measures aro suppressed or retarded in exchango for tho votes
of thoso who profit at tho oxponso of tho public health, prosecuting officers
and judges who fnvor -wealthy violators of laws for tho public protection, thoy
are as contemptible in ovcry way as is Ismay and just as responsible every
wcok for a bjggor death list.
Blamo tho Titanic owners for not having lifoboats, if you will, but do
not overlook tho hotel owner who skimps on firo escapes, or the grafter who
winks at whlto slavery, or the man who rents his property for immoral purposes.
There aro plenty of Ismays in this world, and even Honolulu is not freo of
SUPERVISOR- KRUOEU. Talk about being a supervisor, there's, nothing
in it. I'm going to writo a book about being a supervisor.
HARRY LAKE, special detective. Tho city attorney's office didn't ask
for a nol. pros, all day yesterday. The courts weren't in session.
HOP SING. Bimcby I hanahana paikau plenty. No givo polico bribe,
only present. Mistier Brown ho speak loleh Present alright; no pilikia.
ALBERT HORNER. If thcro is any plan to homestead tho lands of
plantation I havo not heard of it. I don't think thoro is anything in the
MRS. KALAKXBLA. Our hat is in tho ring, all right, but wo will havo
to take it out and throw in another ono pretty soon. Tho fashions in millinery
do chnngo so quickly.
JACK KUOMAA. I hear somebody of tho Manua precinct liko to make
somo slato for supervisor and put B. von Damm's namo on the ticket. I tell
you nothing doing. J. Harris Mackenzie for us overy time.
TREASURER OONKLINO. If they wnnt to fight our assessments let them
do so. They will havo to fight to tho last court of appeal and when it is all
over wo will know just where wo stand and what wo may do in future.
JOHN SMITH I note with pleasuro that Prince Henry XXXVII of Rouss,
tho son of tho late Prince Henry XVUI, is to visit America with tho Gorman
cruiser squadron. I am wondering what has becomo of tho intervening nineteen
TIRE CHIEF THURSTON. Tho auto firo trucks wo will take around tho
city today for tho peoplo to seo are only tho first, I hopo, of several
firo fighting machines. Honolulu has grown so and tho suburbs aro so
widoly separated that wo must have quick machines to got "to fires in.
W. H. HOOQS I covered tho routo taken in the Orient by Secretary W00J
of tho promotion committeo, and found that ho left a trail of promotion literature-
which was conspicuously displayed. In only ono placo did
I havo any trouble in finding any, nnd then It was produced from uder a counter.
Mr, Wood did splendid work on his last oriental trip. In order to keep
this up I bclievo a man should bo sent out from Honolulu nt'loast once a year
checking up the literature distribution.
When St. George's Day Was Celebrated
Whilo St. GeoTgo's Day slipped by this year without celebration in this
city, memory goes bnck to many pleasurable occasions in tho past, when tho
day, April 23, was fittingly observed in Honolulu. Even so long ago as 1804,
8t, George's Day was ono of tho most conspicuous dntes on tho calendar and
upon that occasion thero was n great gathering in tho now Public nail, among
whom wcro most of the leading British residents.
W. W. P, Syngo, British commissioner, presided as toastmostcr at tho banquet.
Among tho speakers wcro llov. Mr. Ibbotson, Judgo A. G. M. Robertson,
R. C. Wyllle, Henry Rhodes, W. L. Green and John Montgomery.
Fancy Ball of Same Period.
Another memornblo occasion of tho samo year was tho "Children's Fancy
Ball," held at the British Legation on tho evening of March 20. A number of
Honolulu's promlnont residents of today participated In that ovent. Mr, and
Mrs, Syngo grootcd tho children as they entered
Then forming into couples, tho youiigstors, in handsome costumos, promo-
this ono ought to bo filed for reference somowhero, whoro it would point nlnaded around tho room, saluting Ills Majesty King Kamobamchn V. and Queon
moral about a knowledge of documents In Its relation to n knowcldgo of that 1 Emmn, who wero present. Among tho chief characters wero tho King and
moat necessary tuing, 1110 coin or mo roaim. it ompnnsizes most Borrowmiiy, I (Juoen of Hearts (MaBtor Jiddlo Mncfurlatio and Miss JHanelie Maerarluno),
too, tho fact that a complete acquaintance with musty, moth-eaten history
sources is possible without familiarity with such a thing, for Instance, its a
Mr. Lydccker Is at present ono of thoso fortunMo ones who Inhabit tho
Wllbolmliia and Imbibe fcShriner cheer as ho goes to the Jom Angelas Hlirlnor
high j 1 11k 1, Tho ways ami menus that mndo tho trip possible, especially re
ferring to Mr. LydMkor, ore, of courio, too encrwl for print but It Is at leant
permissible tn spunk of the delusion under which our genial archivist labornl
just previous to kls departure.
Ono morning Mirly lie walked out 011 tho sidewalk In pltk up hie Advertiser
and found lying Wlilo It n huwlrwldullar bill, At thnt very moiimnt, tlm
ruJitlon of u urlilvUl'i mlary to tho xiim)i0 of h llirlnor uulna to J,
attended by their knight, the Jack of Hearts (Master W, Mncfnrlano): Ilobln
ton Crusoe (Muster Cecil Drown) nnd his man Friday (Master Malcolm Drown)
and tho May Queen (Miss May Soveraneo),
Among tha other participants wero MU Mlddlo Syngo, Masters Itobbld,
Frank, Ollhort nnd Thackeray &yngp, Master It. O, Wyllla, Miss Hatty Itoblnson,
Mis Tilly lloliliiBon, Muster Iluinn'y Von I'flnlur, Master Druco Cartwrlght,
I Master Ally Ciirtwrlght, MIm With Htuloy, Miss Dluneho fltajey, Master !
lelhoku, Marcus Colburn, Mla llulen Aldrlch, Master WHlle Aldrlen,
MIm KnnnU Harris, Mm Maudo Dudott, MUim Mary and Alice (Ircen, Misses
Annie, Dernleo nnd Jennie Pitrkv, Mlis IV tiny Dates, Mlu Mary Hates, MuUr
Hail) Htoll, MI11 Luartitlu (Iri'in, MU VI or euro llobertson, MUs Muln (lull-Inn,
Master Morris HaIm, Muster .luinen Mun.urrut, Miulrr Harry Iue, Misses
riorence ml Alice m), MUs UvInU MnrtfitM, Mter Clarence Muefurlune,
MUi Dorl 11 ml Annie Huiok. Mil Annie AlilrUh. Mlu Annie llrtlieoek. MUI
Joicnhluo nnd Nelly Jlurnsnl, Mtrntar ltd war i lUnmrri, Muster Herbert Austin,
Mill Mule llubtMQM, MIm Mtrh ('alburn, MIm Annie OIquiIoii, Ml Km I Id
DUVioh, MU IUrli Jlwrlmnli hu4 MIm Hih Jfyd.
Aflar limiting and kwm, ppf wi rtrj and thr rveut W dill
wlili pUaMirw y ili "jrwy ujw," wh, hi iblldttA, wA wrry ujmu
ABOUT PEOPLE AND THINGS
By Katherlna M. Yatet.
An enthusiastic Honolulan nnd an apparently naenthuslaitie Heoiler were
riding in a street car tho other day. Said the Honolulan, with
kindly condescension in hla volco:
"How does our scenery compare with yours in Indiana! "
"Well," raid tho Hoosler, glancing out with a critical eye, "I suppose
that tho lumber is just aa good, nnd they probably uto si good a grade of
paint; but it seems to me that they don't put It on quUo eo well as our men
do thoy haven't the Teal nrtUtlc touch. That cigar over there, for instance,
and tho elbow of that man in tho pink suit, and the ear of the ono on the
rampant surfboard; all out of drawing, absolutely out of drawing!"
Tho Honolulan was silent.
Half an hour later, as tho two walked out Kalalraua avenue whero the
eocoanut nnd ironwood trees swayed and tho and pale
ocean gleamed and flashed In tho sunshine, tho Honolulan rogained hla
"How Joes this sccneTy compare with yours!" ho asked, loftily.
Tho Hooir touched Mb tongue to his lips nnd gritted his teeth contemplatively.
"Tho flavor is much the same," he said, and running hla Angara
around tho edgo of his collar; "tho texturo doesn't Becm to bo very different;
but it Isn't stationary enough to suit mo. There's a lot of watnr and it is a
good color all Tight, and considerable land of varying degrees of density for
somo distance 'above tho surface-proper; now if you comld doviso somo seheme
for making your scenery a littlo moro compact, bo that ono might get on top of
it, instead of walking through it and swallowing It nnd breathing it into his
vitals, it wouldn't bo bad at all. You see, there's a Httlo too much separate-ness
between your water and youT land. How would it bo if you wero to combine
them a trifle, it's a mere suggestion of mine, you know, but suppose
that you wero to put a slight layer of tho water over tho land, 0 mere sprinkling
now and then just bo thnt you could como temporarily to tho surface and
breath,1 don't you consider that it would add to the landscape! Try it some
time, as an experiment."
Tho Honolulan said nothing. He couldn't think of tho right thing to say.
They strolled across tho park and on toward Wulalao road. Tho- scent of
acacias and oleanders was in tho air and the roadsides wero bordered with
beautiful wild growths, luxuriant and brilliant. Tho Honolulan, a fervent lover
of nature, gradually gathered enthusiasm again.
"Our roadsides aro always beautiful," ho said, "nnd always the same
from month to month, never any change."
"Yes' vaid the Hoosier, "I havo noticed. I camo across hero two months
ago and all waB exactly tho samo as now; the same piles-of rusty cans and
wash-basins and dish-pans in exactly the snmo places. That teakottlo over
there had pTecis'ely tho samo tilt then that it has now, that Rockefeller can
held exactly tho same quantity of water, tho broken bottle lay at tho same
angle; yes, you aro right, your road-sides never change, they aro alwayB,
always tho same."
"Hum," said the Honolulan.
"Would you mind telling me, though," went on tho noosior, "what is tho
idea, of arranging these collections of at these many and various
points! I havo wondered about it frequently since I came, for I find them in
all my walks, they aro hero, they aro all along the roads In the Punchbowl
district, they appear constantly. What is tho idea of It! With us, wo don't
collect them, wo toss them out wherever it comes hundy, ob if they had no
value; but you collect and mako permanent exhibits of them. I havo wondered
if it might be for the purposo of making it plain to tho traveler that the Sandwich
Islands bto bo far civilized as to find use for tea-kettles and oil-cans and
wash-basins. Is that the intention!
Tho Honolulan cheered up a little. "That," ho said, with duo prido, "is
the work of our mosquito campaign."
"Oh," said the Hoosier, "a campaign to breed mosquitoes! I see. Of
course these articles accomplish tho purposo perfectly. But what was the idea
in breeding mosquitoes here!"
"Not to breed them, to eradicate them. These things were gathered together
from tho adjoining tracts to 'eradicate the mosquitoes."
"How interesting!" said the Hoosier. "Science certainly Is wonderful, is
it not! And so it has been disc6vered that mosquitoes will breed in scattered
receptacles; but that by collecting the receptacles into groups, they will bo
annihilated. Most interesting. And by the way, I wanted to ask you "
But tho Honolulan hnd taken to the tall grass under cover of a cloud of
landscape, raised by a passing automobile.
I don't bco tho least bit of difference, excepting in sizo and irritating properties,
between a copiously illustrated billboard and a knpu sign. There is certainly
no difference in tho resultant, effect. The idea of organizing to boycott
tho billboard advertisers is absurd, even if it were not against the law to do
so. We don't have to organize in order to condemn other disturbers of our
peace, and why should we in this instance, since every citizen and
and with tho slightest particle of civic pride, sees tho name of a
billboard commodity or firm as if surmounted by a fine, largo, mental kapu
sign. 'What use to get people to combine to do what they will do anyway unless
they aro "undesirable citizens!" Of course thoso who advortiso upon tho
billboards do it undcT tho mistaken notion that their business will be augmented
thereby; whereas in a community such as this, whoro everyono loves the
wonderful beauty of form and coloring and sky-line, and recognizes that wo
aro favored in these points nbovo the inhabitants of 'all other countries on tho
globe, it will not take long for the advertisers to discover their mistake, and
probnbly at considerable cost to themselves. But that is as it should bo. Tho
man who rates tho homo pride, tho appreciation of what is best, tho good tasto
of his fellow men 'at too low an appraisement, surely deserves to loso in thd
process of learning to placo them at their proper stondaTd.
ORDER BP ODD FELLOWS CELEBRATES
In celebration of tho ninety-third
anniversary of the founding of the Independent
Order of Odd Follows tho
locnl fraternal order held an elaborate
social function in Odd Fellows' Hall
last night which wns attended by more
than five hundred persons.
The festivity opened with a formal
literary program on tho second floor,
Dr. ,H. T. Hollman, chairman of tho
committeo in charge, Tead tho proclamation
and dolivercd a brief address of
welcome, after which a prayer was offered
by Chaplain Tschudi. Mrs. M.
W. Tschudi then played a piano solo
and tho program closed wiin a recitation
by W. G. Chalmers.
At the close of the literary program
tho third floor and tho roof garden
wero thrown open to tho whist playors
ITS NINETMH! ANNIVERSARY
and the dancers. The younger clement
took over tho daneo hall on tho roof
garden, whero tho Kawaihau Quintet
Club furnished the music, whilo the
elders packed tho card-room" on tho
third floor and were moro busy in a
great round of progressive whist. At
nine-thirty o'clock, during an intermission,
refreshments were served after
which the party returned to tho ball
nnd the card tables'. Tho decorations
of tho ballroom, lighted by Japaneso
lanterns and draped with flags and
bunting, wero quite attractive.
On tho committeo ia charge wore
Doctor Hollman and L. Petrle. The
members of tho general committeo were
O. Evenson, A. F. Clark, W. O. Chalmers,
K. A. Jacobson, Miss Amy
Miss Jennlo Macaulay and A.
The ORIGINAL and ONLY GENUINE.
Acts Ilk Charm In Checks and arrests
DIARRHOEA, d i FEVEn, CIIOUP, AGUE.
the only OptcIHe In
The Cetl Demsdy known for
The only Pllltlv In MHUnAWI, OOUT, RHKUMATHM.
UIMI PMMtl )MHM"f ''"'IT T . . .
LiM liilUiul.ib, tlllMwIill boU WouUlulfl.
t utidJ&&ttujki&!ijiftidf r tfiji i ii.m t
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