Newspaper Page Text
The Evening World Daily Mag azine, Tuesday, Ma y 9 , 1911
Holds the Mirror Up to
Such Is Life
tit;:hl Dally Ficept Sunrtiv by ll I T' -n ' ""hi" ''"""oy, Not. f8 to M
By Maurice Ketten.
mwwww - -- -- -- -. . . - - - - tpjmnnajiMjmnnaji n n,nrM ir)ll)W
J. ANUI'H snW, Pres. and Tress.,
JOM.I'H ri I IT " R R .'inlor. Sec y.
n:t rtk How.
Untered at the Pct-''f?1c N'cw ork ftecond-Cln Matter
.ubsrrln'l'n Hte (o Th I". nlng , For England tod the (nutlncnt and
World tot th I'nited aisici AM ( orntrb-' Id tho I nterustlonal
k- i Caned. 1' ul I'nl'in.
I rSK TbuR HuirSANO WHETHER
Dear hubby, -
On Ver M-IQ QM r M Tn
ME WON'T BE ONE OF The MEN
WON T You BE OMC
OF TR6 MEN in TmP
.80 , Dm
I IN TmC SUFFRAQIVT
VOLUME fll NO. 18.U8.
GOVERNOR DIX'S OPPORTUNITY.
) U WILL I
EPORTS from Albany that Got. Dig intend to
ttand firmly by hii plan for forcing a thor
ough investigation of the State. Bunking Depart
ment are gratifying, llnrdly any intelligent man
can doubt such an investigation ia needccl. The
number of riinilali connected with the mnnnsre
ment of the department tins become too numerous,
and some of them are too ugly, to be longer tolerated.
The Governor must by thia time have become convinced that
can aerie hia party better by acrring the State faithfully thin
by aerving Tanmnny, Wall street and all tho big financial interest!
combined. Nor is it likely there will ever bo a n.ore advantageous
opportunity for self-assertion in the interests of the public than is
fcflorded in this case.
The situation is both interesting and important. The issue ii
Jarge and affects the general welfare. If the Governor has the firm
Bees and the tnct to make a winning fight on it the approval of the
people will more than offset the hostility of those whose schemes
may be blocked by disclosures.
N eminent authority on old books and bindings
has avowed a conviction that two of tho book
sold at the I loo aale last week are apurious.
When asked why he bad not made the charge
before the sale, be answered: "It ia not ethical
in our busincea to say anything about a sale pub
licly until the sale ia over. Frequently frauds and
imitations and forgerie are sold, but wo do not apeak of them nntil
the conclusion of the sale because it might work an injustice and
feet many things that are genuine."
Thia ia a atriking illustration of the code of honor of profes
sional ethics the world over. It ia wrong to decry a book in the
hands of a fellow dealer, but when once he haa sold it and got the
money, then it ia permissible to mock at the buyer.
It is much the same in all professions. Thomaa De Quincy cites
n instance of a physician in London who stated that professional
cthica would require him to let a patient die rather than to call
1b a. qnack to help euro him. And lawyers and theologians are not
orach better. In fact, a happy delicacy of conventional morals ei--nraaaed
with a neat felicity of phrase enablea us to paaa off in pro
fessional ethics many a devioua turn that in absolute ethics would
fcava to be bluntly described aa conniving at fraud.
GRADUATES AND GOWNS.
No iwowT ' a.no i Forbid You
To Para.de' VoukSElF.
) NOUSE-IF I INSIST HE
V will BEAT vie
" Z fig
( ASK Tour HUSBAND WHETHER 1 , Tl fwMAT A
HE WONT BE ONE OF THE MGN 1 lcftA&T I DO I
lITU the approach of the commencement season
in the college there cornea tho annual nutter and
apluttcr among women as to how the sweet girl
graduates shall wear their hair and wherewithal
they shall clothe themelvea.
As this argument and high debate, with It
inevitable irritation and acrimonies, breaks out
stud rages anew every spring, and has done so ever since colleges
for women were instituted and public graduations were permitted, it
would aeera that by this time there should have been a basis of agree
ment reached and established.
The fight, however, comes up always in the old shape of sim
plicity against fashion. It is much tho same as Queen Mary's fight
o shut out hobble skirts from the British Court during tho corona
tion. There is no tribunal to which to appeal, and each college and f
.keen .! haa . ;.. : n .
- v ugui, imc ibbuo over u u it were orana new every
jear. Fortunately the contest is of no great moment, for no matter
which tide wins, the graduating girls look lovely to all beholders, and
ome deem them the loveliest that ever were. It is a safe auMnce
that this year there will be no exception to that rule.
Mr. Jarr's Evil Genius Takes Human Form
and Matches His Brains Against Harlem's
LIGHT as a falling cherry blossom ami unnuspr cted cs a suWirranean
aprlng, a runior haa drifted to New York from London whldi may
revohitlontM the world of women. .
They arc holding a clothes exhibit Juet now In the BrrMeh city which 1
ahvaye under a ctoud. and according to the despatches which havs readied
New York, the affair marks the funeral of Iho barom skirt.
"It ta dead dead aa a door nail, and the sooner It U burled the bet
ter," said ons exhibitor. "?
And then In hushed tones proper to the Impending obsequ'es be added:
"A new fashion Just the ojposlte of the present one may be coming anX
fllninens may be no longer necessary."
Of eourse, beforn the mouutalns skip like rams and th little womtr
'.Ike lambs In their mad nleae from tho narrow skirt and Its attendant
i harness, conflrniat'on of this new emancipation pro lamat !on must he ha'l
nut by all the laws of fashion and the profit of dr'.-.:naktng, It la pros-.
able that tho reign of the drumstick beauty la nearlng Its end.
Id Paris on famous dressmaker has dsslrned no gown this aeasoa with wnlob
s corsst could by any possibility bs worn. And this may mean rht In a year or
o tli natural llnea of the feinaJe fluur. now confined to art mascuiua and Turk,
lah bath, nisy venture to reappear. Where mathenisUclns fall In aquariaa
the circle, the stout woman with s made-lo-ordcr corset succeeds triumphantly. w
But what a spectacle ane Is when ah gets throuitil
What spectacles w hav all beeu allies tb hi DISSS edict went forth, snd how
lucky It Is that w nav educated mm to admlr what la aet bsfors hm and ask
Women all over tb world bowed to tb sartorial ukssc, snd th f.rla ot
Chins and Japan, whars fashions hadn't changed for centuries, atupped tlndlna
tbelr feet and dedlcatsd their eiierglei to sheathing tbelr kimonos. m
Fashions are always lymooilcal of ths time they represent. One nss only tu
look at the pictures ot Marl Antoinette snd ths Umpreas Jossphln to rsalU
now much woman owe to tbe Frenoh Hevolutlon.
From ber powdered hair to her eight-Inch heels Marts Antoinette's costum
tzpreased sverythlng that wss frivolous, artificial and decadent. And ths Revo
lution would hav been Justified If U had brought no other reform than emand
nation of woman from the boarded bodice and ber return to tbe free waist and
gracious draperies ot Greece In th modes of the Directory and the Umpire.
Ths fashions of UBO brought sloping shoulders and sloppy sentimentality.
Later came the hoop skirt, and muca later tbe bustle And nothing show mor
clearly tb mental advance of the women of to-day than the failure which meets
any effort to revive those vuUar atrocities.
We are learning to dare tu be ourssive menially, and IT tiers is anrtnln
In that rumor from London, we may rantur reluctantly to let our slothes tail
lb truth about our figures.
By Roy L. McCardell.
FT In th stilly night oar
neighbors hav had occasion
to sniff Intelligently and then
y: "It sm to m 1 smsll
a skunk." Which Is usua.ly
true, a this animal la uullu n.snt.fil
ticreabbuts lu a wild stabs. It has re !
nislned fur Alva Wcnlen to form a j
syndicst far the purpose : rals.ns I
""! to sell njt lur tuali perluuisry, 'are out 11 each unu n
i.l 11 Is mors rpctd thau admlrtd, Dollars bat rights all
but fur tfctlr palts. which. It appaar. ! Horcsueck.
bsvs bsooms fashlonsble for wealthy I
ftoiaies to keep themselves warm la.
Our falluw-naturalUt. r.ruat Thomp
soa Satun. Is saslstlng Alva with advtc
ana skunks A slab pellaed has beo
cuaatructad, with tbe ends (tuuk thre
ftt (ix Inches lu lb earth u prevan
th varmlnu from dUglug out aud
gulTi elsewhere, within which tbey t
ssptcled to remain and piopaale
htaBrouI)fi aeeaf4lig tu air stuus
UK news must nav sou around
by wireless that Mr. Jarr was la
Qua' and In a hospitable mood.
Whether t ft I
was true, or that
Uus's best cos
turners sensed It
b y Intuition, o r
whether It was
merely a coinci
dence may never
be known. Tb
however, that one
by on they
dropped la and
11 umj .tu.ul oe auunn wuviuvr
tbey bad learned or sensed that Mr.
MJohael Angelo Dlnkston ws with Mr.
Jarr or not, but It was soon apparent
that It was from no lov ot that tru
liobsmlan snd lidoula ot a big city
that thy cam a. Cms by on tby
looked Mr. Dlukaton up and down with
ome contempt and than edged away
I .www., xwwwww,!, 1 Mr. Ochmltt, ths dsllcatMMn dealer
I In tb neighborhood, was th only on
know whars l clams can b due. as i 1 tu speak to him. and ibat was In rsfr-
If vrybody I to get fined who hap- r,ic 10 TUrtt Mr' Dlnkton had paid
pens to dig- in front , New Vorksr ' nlln- Uut " w" ,hl" h had pJd'
It sppesrs that the old la;, of the sUata 11 appcarua.l
of Connecticut says you csn dig clams
when you durn please, but the rJ
estate promutera b sjld to th N. V
H aforvsuJd went and cot a Jim Jay
low nan many others ilenc th boyi
want to bit nlm on th. no about any
thing." Rchmltt, who wss a fussy, busy llttl
man, subsided, muttsring and glaring
at the Imperturbable Dlnkston, who re
carded him with an almost Jocular
"Schmttt 1 right." ssld Blavlnsky. tb
glstler. "This f.-llar la no good. Ilk
my boy Sidney, what Is aa Irish Im
personator In the moving plotur, sad
has a card printed 'Sidney BUwIn, Too.
pin of bona and Dance!' "
"Kingpin of Song and Danes." cor
rected Mr. Jarr, who nod bad tb honor
of being presented with on of young
Mr. 81avlnky protaaalonal onrdo.
"It makes me no difference," said th
alder Slavlnsky sullenly. "This fella
look you over Ilk hs pltlss you be
cause you afe a greenhorn, Just Ilk
son does, ssldes. he's a feller what
. Tht break a glass but wouldn't never
pa- for putting one In."
"I wouldn't aay anything what would
hurt your feeling, etther, Mr. Jarr.''
said Mullar, the grocer, "but a falter
what goes with a feller Ilk Mm. then.
Dialogu e s
By Alma Woodward
Cos Cob Nature Notes j
Ceprrlsat. UU. by Tbe I'ne I'ubuskuuj Oa (Ths New I ml World).
A Matter of Education.
alTswaaftam Osasa Hi
I LswWb aa to laaltar.
Nevar mind about that bot-
"Vinefrar he got from you.
and buncoed me out of tb
iiln with," se'd Qua "Lot by-
the time la
goiiea be as If
it nevar was. I got
nllecttnT. my own bUI
This fellor ain't no good, but it si). Isn't It?
you get Mm ourslds If you I
ius. C. (apolugstlosuiy) I m aw
fully sorry to disturb you, but
will you please tell m the
time every clock In the bouss
Mis L.-Why, certainly. It' Jut 3
e'riiAk. I always have my eye glued
to the dock when It's about tlm for my
Irving to come home from school.
Mr ('.-Ills auhool Is dlsmUsed at
you, of cuuras, ar a fslMr Uk bui.
Having deUvered blmsslt of this phUo
sophlcal rettectlun, Mr. Muller sdgsd
away from Mr. Jsrr and ths ooJscUoa
"What Is there In the petty huckster
ing of rlall commercial puraulta that
daadens tb mutal faculties of mere
articulation and lb functional In
stincts?" said Mr. Dlnkston e'rlly O
Mr. Jsrr. "Ba dead levels of moo
gery bold tham down, Thy can nut
rlae l.lnher lllgl.ts."
Mr. Dink' ton rose upon ms to
jauntily a if to Imply that suob was
ths brUllano of bis intellect that ne
could anally sour above th dullard
minds around him.
"What good Is a bum Ilk that, who
make such cracks?" asked Uepler, the
butcher, who had a dim perception that
Mr. Dlnkston was Indicting the msntai
i ity of those jieaent. "H thinks he'
1 mrt, wuat? lie ain't got uy fflun
Intelligence thun we have,
"bur be ain t," said Ous, "bs' s
"I he i ot a bualnas ot bin own? 1
ssked blavlnsky (who had).
Or I b a taxpayer?" asked Bsple
"Hat U' bluff, ong b don't tows
as much aa we do I" said Mullsr.
intiemen. for ucb for tu sake ot
PHILADELPHIA clerg) gSM ossertad the other day that nine-tenths at
divorce) la lb United State are caused by Uv summer exodus at
they speak properly. Why, you never
bear a word but tbs purest Bnglisb
com out of Irving mouth. No slang.
Mrs. C. (dangerously calm) Tou know,
of course, that my Horry goes to public
Mrs. L. (hastily) Oh, yea. of course
Mrs. C. (with rlslna wrath) And 1 i areument "
auess there Isn't nnv finer or mor 1 Ur. Dlukatoo grandiy.
gentlemanly boy In Nw York than my I your remark, uimrammatical and ob-
they are, tuai yuu iuuuim
"These aeparatlons." said the preacher, "lay temptation, aw-rul temptations, at
th feet of th men who ar oorn nailed to stay at horn and work. And they
lay temptations, awful temptations, at ths fast of the wuiuen who ar off Pa tbs
"Why didn't be say something sout bad , ring? That 1 certainly a most
productive cause of dlvurce," commented on of New York's Justices ot tb
uprem Court. "A a matter of (act. inost of tie divorces lu this city srs In
the cases of couplos who live right hers, neither tne husband nor th wife olag
away to summer resorts on account of Isck of money."
The New York j .nl.it addud that the great majority or divorce are sought
by women between thirty-five and fifty. And to me this seeir the moat tgnifl.
cant fact the discussion brought out.
There Is no reason why a woman should loss bsr husband's lov at thirty
fivs through any waning ot at tractive.),
"lis caat ms asld like a withered tlcwer" sounl very well to tb wojiaa
who aaya It, but It I not x convincing to t.er who hars 1L
In the first place, a Dower ha no right to be withered at thlrty-flvs. At
that uge some of tn world most famou sirens were Jut getting thsb- galu
Midamt de ilalntenou. who ruled France through Uie must arbitrary old egotlf
ever boru; Madame Kecamlsi, NlAOn de I'Bnclcs, practljally all tho wurld-tlr-rt::g
beautl clean back to thoio elderly widows, Ctsopatyg and Helen of J .-uy,
wer In the oclni ot their power and pulclirltade I Bag, Ion of toy thy At.
entitled to tMrty-five candl ol their birthday cakes. So uge g uo excusa
I don't think I ever understood the difficulties tlist mlKht beiOt the wo.xaa
who undertakes to keep a certain type of busbssd faithful until I become tbe
owner of a Scotoch collie om time ago.
At first b was known as tbe angel oollls because of bis ongrsllo disposition,
but later beoauss of his capacity for flight, gugar, peppermints, gross flattery
oould not keep nlm at bom.
Turn your back and b was) out of Uie door or lb window, to bs return)
svcral hours later by an sxpsctant delivery boy or tbe butcher's wagon.
Ones, however, after a search of thre day I found him In a strange flat
In Newark, loving ths new family to death and perfectly acclimated to the
Slraabtrrl ar In .ioiu, tut.
thank tu Mr. Mellcn, (boricakes ar
possible His diligent engines pull us
twrr'.es from point when, tb .aasun I lot of lAfllSg) lords, iufcea and earl
Th mil cemetery by the poad en j No Loncer Old Fashioned.
Hlnii,.. ...... t. .v. . . I
- " j ' ...... "iioi. ui, ruae I o re
tainer of th hamlet slP. 1 bln.
ud by tb popular as a plac to wala
to keep from (etllns- their feet muldy.
whll every time tbe road Is widnej
the dust from their graves sirts IntJ
Ihs highway In China or Japan aucn
treatment would be considered un.ivil
pjott, but It go heie unu itlctd. Chief
John Cos Cob, after whom the vtllag
Vas named, lies here and no end
of gjieeators of others who are rleu
enough to huve it prott U I ir they
wuuld. We see by thu papers that a
I earlier. Bevsral hav already been
eu tn our midst.
There Is nothing prettier than a
ptaih tree m biosaom, aul many gar
den patches ar pink with loom Unci
M'-an llusied can reua-moer when
SSJCb grew on big trees up by It ana
li.il. end little boys were nut corul 1
. it. bai It Ihey went nd helped th n
kOiVM Th three Merrttt boy hav ban
convicted of digging clams btweaa
bigh and luw water mark In front ot
tbe bouse of a man frum New Tork
who are descended from Oliver Crom
well will not bury his head, nhish
somebody keeps as a curiosity; whLb
goes to show that nobj.ly 1 Inter. sled
In dead folk. All tho same, tuy
oughtn't to ua.s en them.
The cherry trees art in blosgam, aa
tetween tn b-iy anJ the birds vary
few of ka grow up to 4 t nto coca
tal.s. Oov. lis .' Is said lc be think. uj
of removing Btate Highwayman Mac
donald "for cause." If the Uovernor
will look at the I'ost road b win nut
W would lik to i hav s to think vary long.
Mrs. L.-- Yes, but tbsn bs baa that
long trip up tn ths subway, you know
Mrs. C Do you think It' (of for a
rhtld or Irving ag to mak that trip
tn th aubway twica a day?
Mrs. L. ispghlng) Oh, there sre lots of
drswbscks to his going to a private
school, but when you sum them all up
and weigh them with the hurrurs of
j.ubllc SohOOl, why
Mis. C, it-nldly i I dnn't e why you
are so prejudiced on the subject of pub
Mrs. U (haughtily) Oh, my deer. Juat
look at thu rift raff a child has to
mingle with In the public schools!
Mrs, c Don't you think that's exag
gi rating It a bit?
Mr L. (po!sltlvly)-No, I don't. Mr.
I.awton and I sacrifice many llttl lux
uries to keep Irving at achool, but It a
w orth It. The child show where he
Ita his training he's a llttl model
. . ..tleinan!
lr. Oi i.islle)-H'ni!
Mr U (With running start) Yes.
indt41 W . ih nlnut hu come In
ih, room VI y Oil la Kt a notice of him
I,:. des im Ir ItlseU they're taught
table etiquette and drawing room ds-
vry poriment and all those tilings that are
I such a grand foundation tor a gentie
n Ola tlm whn I man! Why, I bUev Irving could lead
the bank' accounte wer queer w I cotillon right now!
ent for an expert. now we una i Mrs u, istanuing tor id naotiyi
U (- 1
Horry! asl (
Janitor tvuJdonly bulling In) Mia
J.nwmn. Mrs .jwl ri, ma'am!
Mrs. L. (raising hsr patrician browa)
Wall, what ll Is what's th matter?
Janitor KM ms (loally) Oh. Mrs Law
ton, that boy of your 1 naarly pulun'
tb scaup off Horry Chase, down bar la
Mr. C (brisking') What' Stop aim.
Janitor; please stop aim I
Mr. L. (.raising bar volo) Irving
Irving! (After a minute of intense silence Ir
ving appear at th foot of th shaft).
Irvltii (sullenly) TSj ma'am?
Mr. U (incredulously) -Irving, re
you touching that public school child?
Irving (still warm from the combat)
Aw, lie pun-hud my top and I Juit told
him I'd fracture bl mop If be tried any
of thut liy mug comedy ou me and 1
did It! That' all.
Mrs. L. (In a near-faint) Irving'
Whore did you ever bear such language
1 uevcr heard you ua such words be
fore! Irving (disdainfully) Oh, what' th
1 use of Hashing em when no one under
1 stands! Our slang club down at achool
get the latest Importations -these pub
lic school y.ip don't know real slang
when Ihey sou I;' i'liey get the bid tuh"
I second year out, and all of that!
(Mil I.awton and Mrs. c hase glar at
on another across th abaft.)
Mr. C with plcndld effect) Harry,
leave that young rowdy immediately and
corns upstairs And th nest Urns I
catch you speaking to a private oobooi
,,11 . . .- v,.ii la r m ' '
wit. mmj ' - ...... I, I MihlAli nr.vill.H I H.r.
1 Infer from uermeii iu.... r
He was giao iu see me, ui cuurse; out was unmistakably orry to leivs
hi ne.v friend.
And since then be ha been kept on a chain.
You e. the trouble with runawuy collie and faithless husband u th.
am a ort of universality of aflectlon that make very onu equally a,
lightful nd worth loving.
Not all huband ar that way. nor all colllea But th symptoms srs
unmistakable, and when we rcognli them ws might as wall savs our poppsr
mints and got o chain or a dlvoroa
UT pcrhapa we will all aav to luaut on getting or laying married u
-7 Dr. uertna crowning or nurccsisr, anas., uas tier way, for Dr bertha
for an alienist."
Mrs. U UtlU going onJ-Ob. yso, and obiid IU punish you I (slam door).
trial my Intellectual status g un a leve.
with your own."
"Ye, yuu ain't such s much at any
thing, sold Qua.
"Aa opportunity presents it If to
put th matter to proof," said Dinastoo.
"1 will wagsr you oU a dollar that 1
can talk to you for ten uainuies, using
tungusa suob as a man of my culture
mm m ..j van will not bs obis to
-TineT sven the souse, let oloa ta W anwer. the proponent, of a tax on bachelors by auggeatlng a .lmliar
Intir lst of my . marks. taa on eplnsler and cnuuie. wive
What's tnat?" asked (lug Once the t-tate or municipality edopts this Idea and by so doing puts
"H. say. he 11 hot a dollar you don't matrimony ou the bargain counter, could tb statu, of Llb.rty herself rest,,
..j...n,nil iroo.t as ha stieulu It D0BO
It," sold UTi Jan, who a. lurced by
the uusule altitude of tbe uluer W
side witQ DluUJluu.
"I'll Just lake tnat bet!" said (ius.
And going uver tu the uj.i register
ne Hashed the red 'No aale' disk and
look out a dollar.
"And I'm in ill" cried Slavlnsky.
"And ui I" cried tbe others, bringing
ou. Uietr money.
"Lend . e a do' ir," murmured Dlnk
ston lo Mr. Jarr.
And then I soJd aloud:
Mr. lair ha u.y dollar. Put up
They thru.t the!, m u.ey , into tbe
nanil of Mi. air. who was dwrcid
judge and Staa.holdl ",
"Hold I" crl-'d Ous. "Walt till 1
k ths almanac to IS b. sln't making
"Ool" cried Mr. Jarr.
Mr. Dlnkston Wl t ' his lips, and tl t
great one-sided debate of ths Dlnketoo
tmtollaet against oil Uorlm waa on.
ago by th DOgSS ot Vtnlc and Insist on getting married to ths sea.
Scraps of Odd Information
LEFOHT, President of th vesr.els afloat abov flv thousand ton
Academy of Dancing Master. . are BWBssJ In Liverpool. One-flfth of all i
the Brltleh ateam tonnage, of whatever i
sl.e or description. Is owned In Liver. ,
pooh The Liverpool Steamship Ownsrs'
Association at tbs end of last
la one of those who believe In
the future of the harem skirt and he has
taken It for the Inspiration of a dance
which Is called "La Cherouelle," th.
name of the puffed trouser worn by I owned nearly four million ton of stearu
ViUltiell Of 11." Uust.
Th women of Champery. the wel.
knoen health resorl in Switzerland,
have fTORI tune Immemorial wurn lionet
mascuilue trousers They wear them
not to attract attention to themselves,
but limply for th aake of convenience
for tbey hive to perform tasks whioh
need freedom of the nether limbo
Oa quarter ot oil tb British steam
O' recent death, arm ng men of genius
Tolstoy was a toll, strongly built man
with a leunln head, Meredith wa. a
thin, delicate looking man of mor than
medium height. Swinburne was a very
abort man with a somewhat large bead,
and Whistler wo a maU, Shin man,
with a bead ot mar than tit ordinary