Newspaper Page Text
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TlKIKa WOULD, SATURDAY, DECEMBER 30, 1922.
Looking Back on Two
Wars, the Partners
.Think the Tiger's
Mind May Figure
That All Good Things
An American Senator
in FranceWould Get
as Little or Less Sym
pathy as Clcmenceau
Got-in This Country.
THE VISIT OF M. CLEMENCEAU
BOX irhat I read about bis personal habits
that feller would upset tho domestic ar
rangemcnts of an Owl Lunch Wagon, lie
goes to bed ctctj night at 8, gets up
07677 morning at 0.80 and breakfasts promptly nt i.n
his record as an cater of bardbolled eggs and onion
"If this Illustrator was getting paid for It bo
might so well open an all.nlght short order restau
rant and be done with It."
"If they yras an association for sottllng tho Drink
Question they wouldn't arrringo to hare It discussed
by on old (gentleman whoVhnd a lot of experlenco
as a distiller aftor starting la Ufo as a bartender."
"After all, H. Clenenoean Is a hlghgrado French
man and ho didn't get the nlcknamo of tho Tiger on
"Getting np a program of grapefruit, cereal,
buckwheat cakes and sausages would be throwing
Just so big a monkey wrench Into tho machinery of
n French household as onion soup did to this here
Illustrator's kitchen arrangements."
By Montague G lass.
ELL, Mawruss, I see
where this here Clcm
enceau cot a bin receo-
,tion when he arrived in New York
the other day," Abe Potash re
marked to his partner Morris Perl-
had to put one
policeman a t
every sixth street
corner to hold
back the crowds
and when he
spoke in Car
negie Hall, spe
c i a 1 arrange
ments had to be
made to handle
the audience so
that those who
had gone there under the idea that
he was anyhow a baritone,
shouldn't escape to a moving pic
"From the way the papers
printed the whole pageful of his
speech the next morning, I had an
idea that there was a whole lot of
interest shown in what he came
over here for whatever it was
that he did come over here for,"
Morris Perlmutter said.
"Why didn't you nnd out by read
ing the apeech?" Abe asked.
"What am I a bookworm?" Mor.
rls retorted. "It's all I can do In my
eporo momenta to keep up with auch
things In tho newspapers aa don't con
cern me like murders without I should
waste my Ume reading full page
speeches by even domestic politicians,
let alone imported ones."
"Well, you needn't think you are
acting: unlquo by feeling that way.
Mawruss," Abo said, "becauso there
Is over a hundred million people In
this country, Including1 me, which
thinks tho same way as you do."
"Then what did ho come over hero
for?" Morris asked.
"Say! His time Is his own, ain't
it?" Abe said. "And besides, I under
stand ho was invited by an American
association called tho Friends of For
eign Policy or tho Independent Order
of Foreign Policy or something like
that, although I don't think myself
that they knew what they was In for
when they sent him tho invitation."
THE TIQER'8 QUEER MENU.
"Do you mean that he took them
seriously when they said: 'Why don't
you coma over and see ua some
time,' or If you ain't got nothing
bettor to do In tho next few yean),
why don't you take a little run over
to America?' or something like that?"
"Well, I think the chanoea la that
they gavo him a regular Invitation
all right," Abe declared, 'but from
what I read about his personal hab
its, Mawruss, that feller Clemenccau
would upset tho domestic arrange
ments of an Owl lunch wagon. He
goes to bed every night at 8, gets
up ovcrv- morning, nt half past 3
and breakfasts promptly at 4, and
as tho Independent Order of Foreign
Policy couldn't get any hotel to talso
him on that basis they had to givo
him board and lodging nt tho house
of a well known illustrator for the
"I always thought an Illustrator
could earn n good enough living with
out taking boarders on the side," Mor
"But this Illustrator ain't getting
paid for It, Mawruss. Becauso if he
was, y'undcratand. he might Just Bo
wel! open an all-nlght short-order res-,
taurant and bo dono with It, which ac
cording to tho newspapers, Clemen
ccau eata a breaKtast which has got
some of tho features of a seventy-five
cent Italian table d'hote dinner com
bined with a picnic luncheon and an
aftcr-thcatro aupper, y'undcratand,"
Abe continued. "He begins with onion
soup and then switches to hard boiled
egga and Swiss cheese."
THE PROPOSITION HE'8 8BLLINQ
"Well, the members of the Ancient
Order of Foreign Policies let them
selves In for It themselves, Abe. As
long kb they wero Inviting a promi
nent Frenchman over here, why didn't
they oak a young, strong Frenchman
Instead of a weak old gentloman like
Clcmenceau. who has to bo fed care
fully on onion roup, hard boiled eggs
and Swiss cheeso for breakfast?" Mor
ris said. "If they don't watch out,
Abo, they'll be giving him soup with
too littlo onions In It orv linrd boiled
eggs tlint ain't boiled hard enough,
y'undcratand, and then with tho pecu
liar kind of digestion he's got. Abe,
tho first thing you know, Clcmenceau
will have to go on a diet of Welsh
rabbit, broiled lobster and hot mlnco
"For my part. Mawruss, If them
Free Sons of Foreign Policy got
Clemcnceau to deliver lectures aa a
part of a membership drive, y'undcr
atand, they'd have much more sue.
cess with a sick benefit plan or some
thing lllio that, because, while I
didn't read tho speeches he's made,
I've seen a couple of interviews ho
gave out, and what he says sounds
like he had come over here to sell io
America tho proposition of going into
a tew doren assorted European
Ware," Abe s&td.
"Well, If that Is the kind of foreign
policy them Friends of Foreign Pol
icy la In favor of, Abe, what thoy
need Instead of a Membership drive
Is a suit by the Government to wind
up the affairs of tho order, yunder
stand," Morris said.
"Still, Mawruss. I don't think that
Is the Intention of these hero Foreign
Policy lodgo brothers," Abe declared.
"They probably didn't expect that Mr.
Clemenccau would pull the line of war
talk he has been handing out In his
lectures and Interviews. After all Mr.
Clemenceau la a high grade French
man and he didn't get the nickname
of the Tiger on his record as an eater
of hard boiled eggs ard onion soup
HAS QONE THROUQH TWO WARS.
"Say I A diet like that Is bound to
have some effect on a man's Ideas,
Abe," Morris said.
"But the chanoea la that them For
eign Policy people didn't think It waa
necessary to check up Mr. Clemen
ceau'a diet before inviting htm over
here," Abe protested.
"They then should ought to have
done so," Morris aald, "becauso tho
way you explain things, Abo, It looks
to mo now that them Foreign Policy
boys Imported Mr. Clemenccau as a
sample Frenchman to show to the
American people as an Inducement for
the American people to back up a
certain Kind of foreign policy towards
France, y'understand, and If tho
French people comes up to tho sample,
understand me, tho kind of foreign
policy wo need In connection with tho
French Is a blanket policy Insuring
us against all wnrs, debts and treaties,
"But on tho other hand, Mawruss,
you've got to consider that Mr. Clem
cnceau Is a very old man nnd bo's
gono through several wars and revolu
tions over In France," Abe said. "Ho's
had personal experience with two Ger
man wars, and If ho sees In the fu
ture another German war, y'undcr
atand, ho's probably figuring that All
Good Things arc Three."
WK THE FRENCH PEOPLE
UNDERSTAND ME, THE KIND
IS A BLANKET POLICY IN8URI
"Even bo, Abe, that ain't no reason
why them Foreign Policy fans should
bring him over hero to discuss the
whole question of foreign policy,"
Morris Insisted. "If they was an as
sociation for the purposo of settling
tho Drink Question Instead of tho For
eign Policy Question, they wouldn't
arrango to havo It discussed by an old
C0ME8 UP TO THE SAMPLE,
OF FOREIGN POLICY WE NEED
NO U8 AGAIN8J ALL WAR8." '
gentleman who had A lot of cxporlencd
as a distiller after starting In Ufo ni
a bartender. It they did, y'undor.
stand, people would say they was In
favor erf Booza Just as their getting
Mr. Clcmenceau to discuss Foreign
Policy makes you bellevo that them
Friends of Foreign Policy la In favor
of War, or at any rate ain't enough
opp'ostd to It to think It Is altogefrWefJ
a bad thing."
ONION 80UP VS. BUCKWHlATU
. . , CAKES.
"WbliIawruas, you've got to
'rait that If they Tiad a Foreign PottojfcS
Brotherhood In' Franco and they wail
to .Import from America a ralMto
Westcrn United States Senator to' ?
make speeches to the French peoplo
- about conditions over here, runder-
stand, they'd be Juat aa much np In. .
the air over the line of talk be would
hand tout as we are over Mr. Clemen-
cean'a speeches, y'understand. and
' stand me, getting up a program "ofc
grape fruit, cereal, buckwheat caxos. ,'?
so big a monkey wrench into the raa
' chlnery of a French household aa
onion soup did to this here Illustra
te r" a kitchen nrrangementa." Abe gfc
,aid. t :cd
"At that. It wouldn't b a bad lejeav
Abo," Morris, aald, "because, two ?,
uona wjijc;ii ayarw wo my whh dwm
."unlike breakfast dtahes as onk soup .,
and buckwheat cakes, la bound to
have totally different ' outlooks' oft a.
whole Io pt question. The fcoaew
quences would bo Abe, that If a United
States Senator would get;up arid say
mcan things about France in me 'r'
r Senate, y'underptand, t'h$ Frericp pto-
plo "would understand that It wait only 1
the result- of eating a ou'plo or buck
wheat colics which dldnH-sIt right,
understand. Whereas If a French poli
tician would say something In the
French Scnato which sounded Iko la- ; '
suiting the Unltod States, y'under- J ?
stand, we would know at,,onco thai ha
was under tho Influence of onto
"Then you think .that -Mr1; Cleaea
ceau'a speeches about tho 'next war
with Germany is partly on. account of
being written after them etnmgo
breakfasts of his?" Abo .Inquired.
"Well, I wouldn't say. that for aar; ,
Ate," Morris' concluded, ''but before
writing the next one, It mightn't do
nny harm to see what effect' It wottld
havo If he took a half a teaipaonfnl oC
bicarbonate of soda In a tumblerful of
Copyright is, by tha Dn Ornaloata, Sac.
KIDDIE KLUB KORNER SATURDAY SPECIAL FEATURE
Copyright, 1922 (New York Uvcnlnu World)! Press Publiahlnc Company wsvjsvssssnns's"ws's
Around the World and
What Alice Found
lF 'I I
"THE FOX HUNT" A New Game
By Frank P. Flynil
IN OUR HOUSE
November Conteat Award Winner
Last Christmas,' while sitting by tho
fireplace with my six-year-old sister,
we heard a heavy knock on tho door.
For a second or two wo woro very
nervous, but finally I colled "Corne
In!" and In walked Old Santa Claus.
We stood there, not knowing what to
do, until my little sister, thinking it
very nice to see Santo, started In to
toll him about the things sho wanted.
I never saw her ao pleased in all her
life. To my great surprise I found
out that It was my undo who played
a trick on us by, dressing up as Santa
Viola Johnscn, Brooklyn.
. Ult Christmas vacation Is
nearly over,'' said Alien to
"Almost," ho echoed a Httlo re
gretfully. "Of all tho things wc havo
seen and dono since school closed last
week what did you enjoy mast?" ho
"Tho Kiddle Klub Lhow," answered
"night-o:" agreed Jamie. "Our
Klub has given us tho very nicest
Christmas gift wo havo gotten this
year. I think our show was simply
bully. Ruth Friedman and Dolly
Krauso wero dandy, weren't they?"
"ifou always like tho bigger girls.
I think tho llttlq ones were awfully
cute. Don't you remember Clalro
Green and the way she sang 'East
Sldo West Side and 'Sweet Roslo
O'Graly' to tho tuno of tho strcot
organ? And to think of thoao tiny
twins, Ardclo and Barbara Hastings,
doing a .dance llko theirs! I think
they wero terribly clever and so was
"What of tho Coffey sisters? As
long as you uro telling about tho
littlo actresses you can't forget thorn
nor Rozalla Sturz, tho Russian danc
ing doll, nor Eleanor Crooker, who
danced so winsomcly to her brother's
"Don't forget tho boys," Alice cau
tioned. "Fred Lustlg was I ho only
very, littlo boy, who acted. Ho was
good, wasn't ho?"
"Very," agreed Jamie.
"And I loved the boy who came out
us a gul nnd did a too danco and
then whipped oft his curly blond wig
and Bhowed his short black hair
"Ho was fun," Jamie laughed.
"What was his name; do you remem
ber?" "Mortimer Becker.'.' answered Alice
"Alice, you arc a wonder," admired
her brother. "You remember tho
names of all the kiddie actors, don't
"Why .-JiouMn't 1? They arc my
Klub cousins, aren't they?"
"Mine, too," Jamio claimed "and
I'm mighty proud of them. 1 never
had n better tlmo anywhere than at
the KidJIo Klub Christmas party this
"It was perfectly wonderful. I'm
so glad that wc wero right here in
New York whero wo could enjoy It
lii.stcad of being off on one of our
world-wide Journeys In the Good Ship
MnkcbcllevCj" said Ahre.
"You bcl, bo am I," Jamlo n
thuscd. "Hut now that our big Klub
party Is over I want to Mart travel
ing again. I want to sec moro of tho
world, don't you?" Jamie asked Alice.
"Indeed I do. Where shall wo go?"
"Homo nlco warm placv," was Ja
mie's first thought. "Mexico?" ho
queried and Alico agreed.
"Wo will btart to-day," said Alice,
nnd by next Saturday wo will havo
news of our Journey through Mexico
to fiojid back to our Couslna who read
tho Kiddie Klub Korner."
Every one is happy
As we clamor 'round the tree
And the merry faces of children
We all arc -glad to see.
Wo hope that every littlo child
Will have as much as wo
Wc all are very happy
As wc clamor around the tree.
Now where are tho presents,
Let us run and see; '
Fruits, candles and nuts
Aro some things that como to mc.
By LILLIAN VAN NESS, Ago 11,
New York City.
HOW TO WIN A PENNANT.
Kiddles who would like to win a
Klddlo Klub pennant must bring five
new members into tho Klub. Six
coupons, numbered In rotation, must
bo saved for each new member and
mailed to mo with a letter telling mo
tho name, ago and address of tho new
member and the namo, age, address
and certificate number of the kiddle
who wishes to win the pennant. A
new member who "jrlngs fcur other
new members Into the Klub with
him will also win a pennant.
HOW TO JOIN THE KLUB.
CUT OUT THIS COUPON.
IlfBlnnInt with any
number, cut out tx of
thosu coupon, 1,034,
1.035. i.lUB, 1,037. 1.03H
Hnd 1.0:10, and malt to
Cousin Rlfanor. Kvonlnj
World Klddlu Klub, No.
f.jl F'urk Uow, New York
which you mut gte your N'AMti,
AUK and AriDUKSa. Pleaao bo careful
10 nifntlon not only the city In which
iUU II'. C, but thg borodfcii a!.u.
All children up to tlitccn ycara of
aco may become membera. Bach
member la presented with u !!vtr k-ray
Klub I'ln and mtmbtrehlp ttrtlfUalc.
Many years ago there lived In tfcs
City of Vahn a wealthy and mighty
King who had pno jjeloved eon.
Prince Rudolph. Rudolph was a.
handsome lad and was respected by
everybody. He was alwaya ready to
fight for his people.
One njght while he was sleeping
aomfortably In his bed, Prince Ru
dolph dreamed this:
A young maiden, dressed In white',
came before him and said "Go to
that forest yonder, brave death, and
freo the Princess Valhalla, who Is Im
prisoned in tho enchanted castlo."
As she said this sho wanlshed, leav
ing tho Prlnco wondering.
The next day Princo Rudolph told
his father tills mysterious drram. His
father laughed at him.
"Father, I am going to eeek this
Princess and find her If I havo to
loso my head," ho said, and bidding
them nil farewell ho departed on his
Ho wandered several days and
nights until ho met a very old lady,
dying of hunger and thirst, Rudolph
gavo her some water and bread and
soon she was able to speak again.
"My lad," sho sala, "you hie saved
my life, and to show my rratltude
I give you this." And she placed In
his hands an Invisible coat and a
sword. Ho thanked her and con
tinued his Journey.
Many days passed, and soon he
camo upon a beautiful car tie. Ru
dolph entered, but before he went
further ho was stopped by two big
lions. Ho took a piece of meat from
his bag and throw It to them. They
began to light for It, and he ran In
side, put on his Invisible coat and
soon found a giant.
Being Invisible, ho killed the giant
and went on. Ho walked fium room
to room until ho finally found the
Princess Valhalla In chains. Ho
broke the chains and they both es.
caped When they arrived at Prlnee
Rudolph's homo thoy learned that his
father, tho old King, hid died.
The next day Prince Rulolph was
married to Princess Valhalla, and
.they were crowned King and Queen.
Aaron Nusbaum, age It,
WHEN SANTA CAME.
Christmas carols merrily rung
When Santa came,
Littlo children hupplly sang
When Santa came.
I lovo Santa Claus
And you do too,
Don't tell mo you drn't,
Tor I know you do.
I2 Fraucw lrroc!Ich, New York City,,
PI P8 Wm Will Ml Ml !
tefl mm mm EawSI-jmfa wm ""J -
win jf ' n :
1 - "W
HOW TO PLAY FOX HUNT.
THRKE or moro persons may play
this gamo. Ono pluycr must
play "Fox," tho others play
Tho Fox receives a handicap of ti :i
A hairpin will mnko hands for the
Each Hunter spins tho dial in turn,
advunclug as many 0 pacta ou Indi
cated ou aame. Won oil Uunlaia
havo spun, then tho Fox spins and
logins advancing from tho tenth
space, the ono murki'd Main Road.
Arilvmc; mi n markod sqiuiro, tho
llunti f in' I 1 x must proceed In direc
tum In'llo.ii. il
It .1 Hunt- r arrives on a black d'a
iiintiii must remain utatiomiry un
til tin nun 14 haw npun live times. If
tin' I i. i.iuvi'H 011 11 black diamond
he ml iiiictst tiro spaces.
It a Hunter arrives on n whlto dia
mond U advances five apacei, It tua
Fox arrives on a white diamond he
remains Htatlonary and tho others od
vanco thrco spares.
If tho Fox arrives on a upace
marked "Fox," ho remains stationary
until the Hunters havo spun throo
times. If a Hunter arrives on a spaoo
iiiaikcU "Kox" and mimo Is occupied
the Fox, then tho Fox Is caught
and that lluntor wins tho game,
Or, if a lluntor is occupying the
epaco marked "Fo.x" and tho Fox ar
rive on same the Fox la caught and
that Hunter wins.
It tho Fox escapes; alt and gets to
tho den ha -wins the game.
If a Hunter gets into tho den before)
tho Fox he must go back twenty-five
All must soouro the exact number. .
on last spin to get Into den.
Should a lluntor and Fox enter 1
den at the same tlmo It to a Iimm;
At a Junction dansm alwara
to the Iafi Kftlea ocwl laMaaaafc