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Newspaper Page Text
fo mere man gamblers before the
aolice closed it.
g 'Some of her steady patrons
dress stylishly upon their win
nings, which are always articles
Df women's wearing apparel. Re
cent complaints to the police al
lege that Mrs. Foster's "parties"
are not square
That assertion Mrs. Foster de
nied. She' said that marked cards
and cheating were not allowed.
. WORTH KNOWING
Here's something that heats a
shoe brush, and you don't'haye to
pay money for it. Get a strip of
carpet and glue it to a piece of
wood. It wilf'take the mud off
better than the average ordinary
Here's a way to discover the
milk man. Take ah ordinary nee
dle and dip into the milk, quickly
withdrawing in an upright posi
tion. If1 the milk is pure it will
stick to the needle. If it contains
only a small quantity of. water,
this will prevent'even a drop ad
.. A STITCH IN TIME
A farmer's wife returning from
tdwiV was surprised to see her
husband running along the road
td meet her. When he came up to.
her, he exclaimed: -
"Oh, Mary, I am after burst
ing my sides laughing at the
jokes in the Day Book.
"Oh, Jphn," said Mary,' "keep
Dn running until you get a stitch,
m them." w
Ladresand Gentlemen :.I have
a goocf mind to.runvfor president
this, year" -(Cheers.)
I think-there's a chance for me.
(Cries of AYes! Whjr'nofc?") In '
the .first place, I've got' a good rec
ord never having, thrust myself
on you as-"a 'candidate before.
(Applause.) y '
.Second, I'yegot asmany enem-.
ies "as all the other" candidates
put together. Music-': "Always
Kinckin' Myv Dawg Aroun'.")
All my enemies will split up their
votes among the other candi-.
dates, hopiiig'td Beat me, and con
sequently lall-" THEIR enemies"
will -vote for' me. ?(Cheers anld
catcalls.) " v
This is going to be a great
enemy campaign. Every candi
date is going into the convention
with more enemies than there are
delegates. Everybody is going
to be dropped from the roll call on T
the first "ballot Jbecause nobody ,
'will vote fpr anybody. (Laugh
ter.) As a result, whoever'is nomin
ated will face the people without
an enemy to lean uponand will
have to begin an almost hopeless
campaign -to-win -enemies. He