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Newspaper Page Text
halfway between third and home
when I turned first. I was
watchin' him run, 'cause it was
goin' to be close, and sure nuff,
he had to slide.
He hit the dirt about ten feet
frpm the plate, but he didn't stick
there. No, sir. He began to
bounce ajong toward the plate,
touching the ground about every
six feet. He made a bounce a
foot or sp before he got home, and
floated right over the rubber,
about two "feet off the ground,
just as- the catcher caught the
throw frqin the fielder.
"When the catcher seen George
hadn't touched the plate he start
ed to run after him to tag him
with the ball, but every time he
reached for George the latter
wasn't there. He just kept
bouncin' along, with the catcher
in pursuit. When George had
bumped along past the plate for
about five hops there 'was a loud
explosion he settled down like
a tired baloon, the catcher tagged
him, and the ump called him out.
And we lost the game, 4 to 3.
"But that didn't end George's-
trqubles. Our 'manager comes
runnin1 up just as the 'bouncer1
climbs to his feet.
" 'What in the1 blankety blank
blank do you mean,, you blank
blank candidate for the sewing
circle, by pulling off a stunt like
that. Do you think this is a ball
game on a Woodmen's log roll
ing?' And a" lot more along the
"When George got up thetfe
was a big tear in. the left side of
his pants, and a piece of rubber
was sticking out that looked like
the busted bladder of a football.
George was dignified when he
" 'I was .introducing science in
to baseball. My side is all raw,
and after a conversation with Mr
McGuigan I secured two football
bladders, filled them with air, and
then put them inside my trous
ers so I would be able to slide
painlessly. I miscalculated When
I slid there was so much air xe
sistance that it caused me 'to
bqunce. And the frequent bump
ings caused me to blow up. That
was1 the noise you heard.'
" 'Blow up!' howled the man
ager, looking around for a bat.
'Blow up! 1 should say you did
blow up. And you're such a darn
good blower that you can keep on
blowing, young 'feller, and blow
clear out of town, 'cause I'm go
ing to make this7 vicinity mighty
unhealthy for you. Hurry. I
don't want to be tried for riurder.'
There's a plan case of a man
that was so fast and clever that
he run himself out of baseball.
Aint nothin''but face horsesthat "
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