Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1789-1925 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
r?4t-" - -
j Said the wise ones, "Stay single, a wife handicaps you,
She weakens your courage and palsies your arm,
And down to the routine of Jiving she straps you, f-
Trying to keep you from danger or harm !" '.
Butl went and married a dear little girlie '
Who promised to stick till old Gabriel's,, trump,
' And since we were wed I have risen up early , V
And kept myself evermore right on the jump!
She's urged me to(chances Pd never have taken, f "
" j Shes prodded me on when I wanted to quit . ,
And.when I've come home with my courage all shaken
She's stiffened my nerve with her. daring andrwtt. "
And though she has babies to shelter and mother, r
' ' She's made me fight on wliile the rations wefeishort,
. And when I think oVer things one a.nd another
I know that my wife is a good little sport f
v . )
" You can 'take it from me where one fellow is hampered
By having a wife, as will sometimes occur, J
, There are twenty at least' who've successfully scampered,
Cleanout of the mob with a wife for a spur!. ,
TfiafnevertKeless has arrived at the top," J.
cctaubc ui a wue wuji a. biiarp nine prouuer ,. t
t Who hurried him on when he waiited to stop.!
We get it every blessed day:
."Fnrsorry, I forgot" ' ,
It's decidedly provoking, J
Now honest, is it not? -i
We get it from the grandad,
We get it from the tot. "
We get it from the businessman.
"I'm sorry, I fprgot."
Your wife'gives you a letter
,To dear mama-in-law, .,
When you forget Ao mail it
You get a- "call" that's raw.
The boss gies you some woi k to
You're sorry, you- forgot,
You see your raise go glimmering
You've been there have you
It's a bad old combination :
"I'm sorry, I .forgot,"
But there is a way to beat it:
Be "Johnny on the spot"