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The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, July 22, 1912, Image 17

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1912-07-22/ed-1/seq-17/

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i
AlN't'
J" JUST 45 T
REAL SHORT.
Mr. Flannigan was an Irish
statiohmaster with a terrible rep
utation for prolixity. The slight
est mishap on the line would re
sult in a most lengthy report from
Jiim to headquarters.
Eventually he was officially re
quested to make his reports more
concise, and' this intimation great
.ly annoyed the good man.
Soori afterward a train ran off
the line, and this was his repprt
by telegram to the traffic mana
ger: "Off again, on again, gone
again. Flannigan." v
The honey bee has been so pro
lific in Australia that it would be
possible to gather honey in tons
if it were profitable.
iCl
)T.
' ' .t J" '" I ' U ' " ) '"' ' '"
MADE-OVER MANKIND. '
And now comes Dr. V. E. Em
mel, department of anatomy,
Washington University school,
who has surely got us going. The
doctor has taken the blood cells of v
a pig, put them in a mixture of
salt water and tissue juices and
made them multiply actually
produce live, work-day blood.
You see the finality of these sci
entific discoveries, don't you?
You are a weak, broken-down an
imal man. Along comes Dr. Car
roll, who has produced new liver
tissues from sheep's liver. You
get a new liver. Also Dr. Har
rison, who produces reliable kid
ney tissue from a dog. You get
new kidneys. Then Dr. Emmel,
who produces new blood from a
pig. Behold, you have new circu
lation. Working toe-nails froni a
cat, stomach from an ostrich and
skull from a hitching post may;
yet come, and there you are, a
made-over!
Verily we have got to so live
that the respectable dogs, pigs
and sheep will be proud of us,
anyhow. t
o o
HE DID.
Tommy came put of a room
where his father was tacking
down a carpet. He was crying;
lustily.
"Why, Tommy, what's the mat-
ter?" asked his mother.
""P-p-p-papa hit his finger with!
the hamtrier," sobbed Tommy.
"Well,, you needn't cry about a
thing like that," comforted His
mother. "Why didn't you laugh?"
"I did," sobbed Tommy.
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