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Newspaper Page Text
spring at the Mardi Gras, when
she went to the big fete as a bum
ble bee, dressed all in brownish"
red gauze with red wings.
CLOTHES AND MORALS
In Milwaukee there is a judge who hasa. prescription for what
he regards as the prevailing immorality of the times.
He attributes it to those glimses of the feminine integument
which we are vouchsafed by the prevailing fashions.
In other words, he thinks it's the peek-a-bop waist; and the
openwork hose which makes us wicked. The more peek-aj-boo, the
more sin as it were.
So he recommends the old-fashioned hoopskirt as a cure for our
divagations, and a fence against our temptations. Probably he
chooses, the hoopskirt because he regards it as the ugliest of all
things ever worn by woman and he wants the stomachs of our
youth and middle age turned and nauseated by frightful ugli
Judge, you'll never gtt m the Solomon class, nor even in the
Sancho Panza class, by that decision or observation. True, Judge,
a woman does look like an inverted cabbage with a coiffure on the
root when clothed in hoopskirt but those of us who remember the
days when the crinoline was supposed to keep us at a distance know
that they looked good to us then they looked mighty good to us.
Some subtle instinct, Judge, told xxs what was inside.
If ail women were surrounded by balloons we should see in our
mind's eyes the same allurement at the core of the balloon and the
eyes of the men would turn heavenward searching the skies for
balloons, our hearts would thrill at the sight of the familiar lines of
onr dear balloon sweeping down from some cloud or making a land
ing on somebody else's lawn and we'd all go in for aviation.
You can't spoil 'em by hiding 'em.
In fact, travelers and philosophers have observed that it is not
exposure of the human body which makes immorality, but the cov
ering of it up. In the Fijis the dames are elaborately clothed when
provided with a wooden plug stuck through the upper lip. There
is less love making, and general fence-jumping of the sort lamented,
in Milwaukee courts, than in civilized nations. And behold! As
soon as the naked savages put on the clothes of civilization, the fat
of immorality is in the fire of the divorce court.
Clothes introduce mystery mystery allures to investigation
investigation breeds familiarity, and there you are.
The moral is that any sweeping reform in this direction is, in
the climate of North America, a very difficult thing to introduce.
Perhaps we had better leave the whole thing to the "women. Per-Jiaps-.tiiexoH3$-is-mpre
or less -full of prunes.
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