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Newspaper Page Text
i - .Mu;wm!mmt:V i wm
behint tumbled all over Brudder
Sassoon and de Bishop and
tromped 'em good, and a brudder
fum over at Timbkinsville, dat's
a hawse-doctah, hollered dat
Brudder Sassoon was enjoyin' a
fit, and jumps up and sets on his
head to hold him.
"Po' Brudder Sassoon managed
to waller loose atter a spell and
unbuckled his wooden leg and
knocked da hawse-doctah brud
der end-over-ways, and lit in to
hommerin' de Bishop like a houn',
and Brudder Dinger, de gamblin'
man, hollered dat he'd bet two to
one on de black, and all de sistahs
swahmed in to he'p de dear
Bishop. And sich a gwine round
and round yo never did see!
"Brudder Sassoon was put
right out'n de church ag'in and
swo' dat he never would come in
to no fold nary nudder time.
"Nussah! You isn't safe, no
time nor 'casion, fum de wiles o'
Satan, less'n yo' watch like a
NEW YORK LETTER.
5 By Norman.
New York, Aug. 14. F. F.
Proctor's offer of $5,000 a week
for a sensational vaudeville act
for his Fifth avenue theater has
brought him a lot of funny mail,
but he gat the best laugh out of
the following letter from a west
"I see you are having trouble
finding a $5,000-a-week feature
Just wanted to say that the Three
Bittners will head the bill for 7
per cent of the purse. Our act is
not worth much, but we need the
money. We are big favorites in '
Bemidji, Minn., Lone Wolf, Ok
la., and Tucumcari, N. M. Hope
you do five shows on Sunday,
otherwise we would not feel at
"Not expecting to hear' from
you by return or any other mail,
I am, sincerely yours,
" 'Big Bill' Bittner."
A man dropped in on Wm.
Harris, Jr., and wanted to sell
him phonographic records of the
barks, roars -and howls of wild
animals, to be u'sed in connec
tion with the Paul Rainey Afri
can hunt pictures.
"You must have visited Afri
ca," commented Harris, "to ob
tain records of the cheetah, the
"dik-dik, and some of the other an
"Oh, no," said the visitor, "I
didn't have to go any place. r
made all the noises myself."
f IIHh Bsp
fsfcood on - the -bre' midnight
:wasidark.as darfi asrcouldbe)
m a man from the country came along
'hitched hia horse tto"me