A stout lady entered a well
filled street car with her diminu
tive husband. They sat down side
by side and she'promptly moved
over on top of him to give room
for another passenger.
"Maria," came from some
where underneath, "will you
please pay the fare? 1 can't reach
for my pocket."
As the conductor approached
the following dialogue took place:
"Two," said Maria, handing
over a dime'
"One?-', he questioned as his
eyes searched the seat.
"Madame,N I can only accept
fare for one. Your size has noth
ing to do with it."
"Sir! would you insult a Jady?"
"Never, madam. But Where's
the passenger you wish to pay
Maria gave over an inch or two'
and glared at the man in the uni
form. "She's sitting on him," a pas
"It probably isn't . the first
time," mumbled the conductor
ashe gave the register a violent
ring. Maria's husband came up
suddenly for breath, but sank
with the next lurch of. the car.
o o '
ROSE TO THE OCCASION.
One battalion of the militia
had -challenged another to a. sham
CO. SMASHED UP
WHO WILL. PAY
FOR THE PflMflGEfl
THIS RAIL ROAD ) ( BETTER SU
U35r ? 711
Q JaLA- L
MI I d ? ' ! ' V
of a magnificent position on
cinder pile overlooking the six-
foot-wide river. To make them.
'selves secure they blew up tha
only bridge by simply posting-upH
a riotice to say they had done so.
, Imagine, then, their mdigna
tion when, they saw the enemjfi
calmly crossing the bridge, every-,
man holding his ntie over hisJ
.head with one, arm, and waving
the other frantically in front or
"Here", I say," called the cap-d
tain of the defenders angrily,
you can't cross that bridge!
Can t you see. it s blown up r
"That's all right," replied th
attacking- sergeant calmly. "W
are not crossing the bridge. Can
The defenders took possession
yon see we jcswimmingi
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