OCR Interpretation


The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, September 05, 1912, Image 20

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1912-09-05/ed-1/seq-20/

What is OCR?


Thumbnail for

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
a dream in which Quipp' and I
were fighting for the po'ssessjon
of a ghostly carbureter, which
persisted in trying, to ' get into
Quipp's pocket. fjumped up,
yelling like a madman.
" 'Your Honor 1 said next day,
'the defence will iring forward no
witnesses. ' We accept the con
tention that the father died be
fore the son. But I wish to point
out that they died in different
states.'
"Here I brought out amap and
cross-examined a few of the wit
nesses of the other party. No
body saw the significance of the
event. .
"'What is your point?' asked
the judge impatiently.
"'This,' I answered. 'These
states are divided on some maps
by a thin line of red. It doe's not
run parallel with any meridian
it is a purely arbitrary line, zig
zagging from right to fef t as men
have drawn it. It signifies that
the standard time is one hour
later on one side of the boundary
than on the other. So the father
died some fifty minutes after the
'son.'
"And the court went wild.
"Yes, I don't mind admitting
that we compromised rather than
fight the matter out in the higher
courts. But it was for half and
half, not three-quarters and a
quarter. I said that this case was
the foundation of my fortunes,
didn't I? You see, after Jack
Brent died I Oh pshaw! come
home to dinner and let me intro
duce -you to my wife. But don't
mention the Brent case to her."
-J!
: 'FRUIT-JAR LAMP.
A fruit jar makes the
finest sort of a lamp for
die hunting camp, if
the hunter will make a
few preparations before
he leaves home.
The top of the fruit
jar should have a hole
cut through it just
large enough to permit
a lamp burner to be
screwed into it. This
can be an extra top and
lanother top used on the jar, whea
it is packed. M
It can be packed with the oil,' in
it, if desired. An ordinary wick
and qhimney complete the lamp.
He Was Handicapped.
Two anglers were comparing
notes after the day's sport and
they soon began recounting past
triumphs. '
'T once caught a trout" so
long,' said the tall onemeasur-
Ling off the' length of one arm.
That s nothing. I once caught
a pike s'o long," replied the short '
one, stretching out both arms.
"Over in Norway I once'
caught a salmon so long," went
on the tall one, and, he, too,
stretched out both arms.
"Oh, it's no use, my' arguing
with you!' said the short one,:
turning away in disgust. "You
know you've got longer arms
than I have" :
The smart Panama hat with
green satin aeroplane wines is
the thing for outing wear.

xml | txt