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ji ii i M-wttmmmmmmmmmnimmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm other, and headaches from won dering what it's all about-. And every once in so often some aviator tries to drill a hole in a vacant lot with trie crown of his head or gets lost in the lake, or mows down a few of the simple-minded populace in an unsuc cessful effort to prove "himself the wizard of the air. All these stunts are said to be necessary in the interest of sci ence, and maybe J 11 stand for When Gabriel. Toots the Tinal Blast. that, but when you call it SPORT I'll take the count. The only real sporty phase of the game that turned up was pulled off on the first day, when a frog-eating, jabbering little French guy hopped off a train, unlimbered a 150-horsepower breeze buggy, bored a long slit in the ozone at the rate of 106 miles an hour, cooped all the prizes (in cluding the Gordon-Bennett cup) and then beat l it back to dear Paree to "bawl us out because we didn't even try to defend the .trophy. . Here's to-you, Jules Vedrine! You're a bird in more ways than ' one; and if the flying game de velops more game little wasps like you I .may learn to watch if; as a sporting proposition after al The scientific sharps tell us thd human race evoluled from some highly organized brand of chim? panzee, and I believe it, hecausg I've met a good many boobs in my time who didn't seem to hav,e made much headway from somJ such source. I can stand for that theory about our start. What I want to get; wised up to is our FINISH. After studying tHfe flying game here I'm about ready to agree with the first highbrow gent that comes forward -tyith ( the dope that when Gabriel toots the final blast he'll probably summon to the Pearly Gates a fluttering fevf billions of semi-human flamin goes but, believe, me, bo, your Uncle Dudley will take the gvoa old-fashioned "golden stair" for his! " - VERY TRUE " j In the Irish rebellion a bomb shell whizzed towards an Irish man's head. Pat dodged it with a low bow, andjt went byj taking off the head of a man behind him; -"Faith," exclaimed Pat, "yf hiver knew a man to lose any thing by being perlitel" o o c During the past fourteen years the production of crude petrol eum in India has increased by nearly 200,000,000 gallons. J