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STORY ABOUT TOMMY
"Pop," said Tommy Goose
berry, with a sinister smile that
ought to have put Mr. Goosen
berry "next," but didn't, "I heard
about a man who diecTfrom a sin
gle blow administered by him
"What foolishness are you gab-J
bing aqout now? exploded the
paternal Goosenberry. Such a
thing as that isn't possible,"
"But, pop, it is so."
"Tell me, you little nanny, how
he could have given a blow that
would have killed himself. I say
nobody cquld have done it."
"Weir, this man blew out the
gas," chirped Tommy, making
an expedient exit outdoorward.
Next evening Tommy came in
the house crying to beat the band.
"Boo-hoo, boo-hoo!" he blubbered,
m rapidly rising tones, until his
father begged him to divulge the
reason for his weeps.
"I I broke one of ma's ket
tles," he tearfully explained.
"You did, did you," interrupted
his mother, "and after I told you
more than once already never to
play with those kettles. Now you
can go right to bed and be thank
ful that you" don't get a good
"Tut, tutr mother, don't be so
severe with the lad. When you J
were young you did the same
thing, you know," said Mr. Goos
enberry, adding: "Now, Tommys
tell us how you broke the kettle,
and then run along arfd play."
"I was pounding the old kettle
with your watch, pop, and it
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kettle is cracked right
pieces," said Tommy.
"What!" roareM his father,
"used my watch? Why, you
young rascal, get that strap and
then we'll see that you march
right off to bed."
Though Mrs. Goosenberry re
marked about h;s father, too, be
ing y.oung once upon a time,
Tommy got his licking just the
"I sav." said a would-be humor-
isf to a village, porter, "why dicT, t
t. t "1 J 1 " L 1
itney duuq mis station so iar awajr ;
from the village?" "I don't
know." replied the porter grave-?:
ly, "unless they thought it would!
De more convenient to nave iv
broke both of em did, but the
down hece near the railway.'