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Newspaper Page Text
versity of Chicago football team,
has been elected captain of the
eleven for next year.
Joe Rivers and Joe Mandot
have completed training work for
their meeting "ia Los Angeles
Turkey day. Both boys are in
fine condition, Mandot being four
pounds -under weight
Ad Wolgast is a2-to-l favorite
over Willie Ritchie The cham
pion has finished his strenuous
Work, and is resting for the
Thursday battle. Ritchie is down
to weight. -
Frankie Russell! won a close de
cision over Stevfe Ketchel at the
end of teh rounds in New Or
leans last 5night, Ketchel was
out of condition, r
JUST A COMMON PEDDLER
It is recorded in the Bible that
the gift of many tongues fell up
on the disciples at Pentecost.
Judge Robinson contfiyed to
pull off a" little Pentecostal affair
in the South Clark street station
today without any divine agency.
S. Sahlmonius.a peddler Of
West Pullmanj was arrested in
the loop fot peddling without a
Sahlmonius .Was , brought be
fore Judges'Robinson and imme
diately' became afflicted' with, an
inability to speak English.
"No spikee no sabe no spik
ee," was all that could be got -out.
"Very -well,"" said Robinson,
"you're guilty all right. You're
fined $5 and costs, which makes
$11.50 in all."
Whereupon Sahlnymius devel
oped an extraordinary ability to
use-English. It wasn't the kind of
English you could print, being
mostly profane, not to say Vlil
gar. But it was unmistakable En
glish all the same.
"I thought you couldn't speak
English," said Judge Rol)insort.
"An' I thought you were easy " t
said Sahlmonius, as he dug -into
his pants pocket after that $11.50,
'Jan' I'm here to say that I'm
never coming into this blank-blank-blanketv-blank
city again. ,
It's a nest of blank-blank-blank
As Sahlmonius was leaving the
courtroom and his , $11.50 ,"
Judge Robinson called him back.
"Say," he said, "you should
take a tip from those Boston
friends of yoUrs and adbp a pro7
nounceable name like Marshall
Field or J. Ogden Armour. It
would help out my cierk o'feourt
a whole lof the next time.'
"Aw," said Sahlmonius, in deep
disgust, "I aint no highbrow
hold-up man. I'm just a common,
blank-blank, blank-blank peddler,
.Without a mayor Or a city council
or a judge to. my name.
Farmer (on one side of the
hedge, to boy on the other side)
Now, then, my lad, didn't I' tell
you not to let me catch you" here
again? " '
?oy (preparing to run) All -right,
don't make a fuss. You
ain't caught me yet.
Over one-half of the entire popi
ulation of the world are inhab
itants of Asia.