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The day book. (Chicago, Ill.) 1911-1917, January 03, 1913, Image 16

Image and text provided by University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL

Persistent link: http://chroniclingamerica.loc.gov/lccn/sn83045487/1913-01-03/ed-1/seq-16/

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THE TRAMP WAS SMART
Jones is a very little man, but
he always has his wits about him.
The other day he was alone in his
suburban villa when a formidable
looking tramp knocked at the
door and insolently demanded re
freshments. "I'm looking for work." he said,
''and I want something to eat at
once or there'll be some trouble."
And he coolly sat down on the
step.
Now Jones didn't get flustered
a bit, but got an alarm clock and
wound it up. Then he went into
the front room, where his voice
could be heard by the tramp.
Causing the alarm to ring, he
shouted into the clock:
"Hello! Are you there? Give
me the police station quick,
please."
The tramp was all attention,
and thought that Jones must be
on the telephone exchange. Then
he heard the following conterfeit
conversation :
"Are you the police station?
Please send an officer tc my house
at once. There is a tramp here
who refuses to leave. What? Yes,
he ought to be in prison. All
right."
When he went to the door
again the tramp had gone and
so had three hats and four overcoats.
"Does your husband help you
much in the house?"
"Well, John's work is mostly
brain-work. He keeps busy
thinkin' of ways for me to economize!''
RCSOLOT'OW HOT TO 0)O
, COT A&4IN. erTfcft JlH'
V. 33CR BLACK " R9f
HE HELPED
"You look very pleased with
yourself this morning, Higgs."
"Yes, I've good reason to be,
Miggs. I made a will, you know,
leaving my brain to the hospital,
and this morning I have received
an acknowledgment from the au
thorities." "Were they pleased, Higgs?"
"Certainly. I take it that they
were, Miggs. They say that every
little helps."
"Everybody in your office is in
love with the typist." "What of
it?" "I wouldn't
thing going on."
object ? Not a man has lost a day
this year. Not even football at
tracts them."
OSGAR "ANDI
have that sort of
"Why should II

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