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Newspaper Page Text
ifl T- i 4V Hf " jdHfek'c
"Well, Mistah Scahborough,
what's on yo' chest?"
"You misapprehend my mis
construction, sah. Ah said
'chest,' c-h-e-s-t, chest."
"Oh, Ah thought yo' said vest.
Did yo' hear about dat stand-up
fight Ah had in a cigar store yes
tiddy?" "Ah didn't know yo' wuz sober
enough yestiddy to stand up. Tell
me about it."
"Well, Ah went into dat store
an' while Ah wuz selecting a 3-fer-a-nickel
chee-root with an al
falfa wrapper mah hair caught
fiah on de back ob mah haftl from
de cigar lighter. Ob course dat
made a smoke lak a horse-shoein'
forge, an' everybody commenced
stranglin' an' coughin'. De cigar
store man says to me, 'My friend,
kindly take your foot off the
stove.' One word led to anodder
an' finally I challenges him to get
shot in a duel."
"Challenged him to a duel ? My,
but you flared up, didn't you?"
"Yaas, Ah wuz sure hot in de
collar. Well, diss low-down,
impunctilious pusson 'he says to
me, 'Huh, you'd be afraid of git
tin' shot youself, you insect.' "
"Well, what did yo' say?"
"What did Ah say? Ah said,
'Look a-here, man, Ah'm de kind
ob insect dat's used to powder.'
Dat's what Am said."
. "The full strength of the com"
pany will now join in the closing
chorus entitled: 'I Yearn to Take
Back Them Words So Thought
"You look warm." "I have been
chasing a hat" "Did your hajt
blow off?" "It wasn't my hat. It
belonged to somebody else, and it
had a pretty girl under it." "Did
you catch it?" "Yes. My wife
saw me chasing it."
Large flock of Wall street or
gans, headed by New York Sun
threatens panic if Bryan gets int
Wilson's cabinet. Opposition by
these claquers ought to mean a
mighty fine endorsement for that
treasury portfolio, William.
Light snow flurries tonight,
probably followed by fair Tues
day for Chicago -and vicinity;
cold wave; temperature Tuesday
morning near zero; moderate