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Newspaper Page Text
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They (of course they were
girls) were talking (of course in
the nicest manner possible) about
a third girl h mutual friend.
"Yes," remarked one of them,
"she quarreled with Jack and re
turned all his presents."
"Oh, really? And I suppose he
verv naturally returned hers?"
fx. "Everyone of them," replied
le other. "Whv, he even went
far as to send her half a dozen
ioxes of face powder, with a po-
lite note explaining that since he
rst met her he must have taken
hat much home on his coat."
"Did you know his business
ad run down?" "I suppose so. I
eard hewas going to wind it-up."
PA'S PECULIARITY "'
Political activity in the village
was most marked in view of the
possibility of a by-election, and
party wrangled with party to
gain local advantage.
The agent of the Conserveral
Association called at the house of
Mr. Binks, all smiles and smirks,
and the door was opened to him
by Mr. Binks junior, a callow
youth of seventeen, world-wise
"Excuse me," began the polit
ical gent, opening with his usual
remark, "but would you mind
telling me whether your father
leans toward Conesrvatism or
The somnolent youth grinned.
"Well, you see," he replied,
pa's rather wide. When he's with
Liberals he's the liberalist Liberal
that ever walked; but when he's
with Conservatives he declares
that, if he had his way he'd con
serve every blessed thing on
"Ah," replied the agent, "Mr.
Binks, I can see, is a confirmed
diplomatist! But tell me, what is
your father when he's at home?"
"A jolly nuisance!" came the
A clergyman met one of his pa
rishioners in a country lane late
one night. "It's pretty damp for
a man with rheumatism to be
prowling about at night, eh, Wil
liam?" "Well, sir, I'm following
the doctor's advice." "Why, did
he tell you to be out at night?"
"Not exactly, sir; but he said that
I needed chicken."
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