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Newspaper Page Text
ONE AGAINST FATHER
Little Freddy had just put
away a large banana with surpris
ing rapidity, and with his blue
eyes he looked his father in the
"Dad," he lisped, "supposing
I'd been twins?"
Father Shuddered. The thought
was too awful.
"Well, Freddy, supposing you
had?" replied his parent.
"You'd have bought the other
boy a banana, too, wouldn't you,
dad?" said the child.
"Most certainly I should have,"
answered father unawares.
"Well, dad," remarked the dear
little fellow, "you're surely not
going to cheat me out of a banana
'cos I'm all in one piece, are you?"
HAD THE ANSWER PAT
Young Teddy, aged 8, looked
up at his adoring mother and then
"There were only three of us in
school today," he cried, with
swelling pride, "who could an
swer a question teacher asked
He paused. The worshipping
"I hope one of the three was
my darling Ted?"
"You bet I was!" was the
youngster's truculent reply. "And
Sam Harris and Harry Stone
were the other two to try."
He paused again made an at
tempt, it seemed, to wander off.
But his mother longed for more
and other details.
"It does me good t3 hear such
stories of my boy," she murmured
proudly. "Tell me what ques
tion did the teacher ask you, Ted
"Who broke the schoolroom
window!" said Ted, and, turning,
fled in fear.
A certain cruel landlord, by
name Skinner, had a very ugly,,
deformed nose. He was a great
old "boaster," and was so con
ceited as to have placarded on his
gate that "men and money could
do anything." A poor Irishman,
happening to pass by one day,
and seeing the writing, wrote just
beneath it in chalk: "But all the
money in the world wouldn't put
a beautiful nose on old Skinner's
face." Needless to say, the pla
card was seen no more.