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Newspaper Page Text
Lewis' mind appears to run in a
"Chicago's School for Crime
too long tolerated." Examiner.
BUT it's the mote in their neigh
Judge Kavanaugh thinks a hus
band who teaches his wife to
drink and gets her to sign per
mission for him to go with other
women a cad, and isn't afraid to
"Stupidity or treachery only
can beat Col. Lewis." Exam
iner.. Ye-es, writing anonymous
letters bawling out Woodrow
Wilson and being caught at it is
A New York man had himself
made a deputy sheriff because he
was afraid of a jealous husband
and wanted to carry a gun.
If he'd been a Chicago gent,
he'd just have walked into the
nearest pawnbroker's and bought
We wondered how nothing was
heard of Pasquale Orozco in the
Diaz revolution in Mexico. We
feared Pasquale was dead.
But now that Huerta has been
proclaimed provisional president,
PaSquale rises to remark that he
does not approve, and that he is
going to start a new revolution.
Truly, the sorrows of Mexico
are as many as those of our own
beloved Twentieth ward, which
seems to be chiefly populated by
Manny Abrahams and persons
who don'lt like him.
Cudahy, the packer, says that
the prices of meat is soon going
down and that porterhouse steaks
will be removed from the list of
luxuries we cannot afford. But J.
Hog. Armour hasn't been heard
Talking about packers, the
Chicago brand has opened a
school in domestic economy for
working men's wives.
Presumably the principle of
this is that it's a darned sight
cheaper to teach employes' wives
to economize than to raise em
NIX ON INKY FINGERS
The average Frenchman is par
ticular as to his personal appear
ance, and it is not surprising that
the most original device for pull
ing pens from penholders without
inking one's fingers should have
been recently invented by a Pa
risian. The device shown in the
sketch explains itself. The pen is
gripped in the jaws of the clamp
shaped to fit it and is pulled out
by the hook. The dvice is made
"You," sighed the rejected
lover, "would find your name
written in imperishable charac- '
ters on my heart could you but
look." "So?" murmured the fair
young thing, who was aware of
the fact that the swain had been
playing Romeo at the seaside for
something like twenty years.
"So ? Then you must have a heart
like a directory by this time."