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Newspaper Page Text
"Mistah Scahborough, Ah seen
yo' loeikin' gloomy down at de
end ob de dock yestiddy. Wuz
yo' thinkin' ob jumpin' off?"
"No, Ah wuz waitin' to see ef
de boat mah wife's on wuz comin'
in, Mistah Poinctextah."
"Why didn' yo' send a aero
gram to de boat?"
"Ah tried to, but de wires wuz
down. Say, Ah got a letter from
her last week. She says dey got
seberal good hotels over dere."
"How wuz de cuisine?"
"She, didn't stop at dat one."
"Did she hab any message fo'
"Vaas, she been usin' dat hair
tonic yo' recommended. She says
tell yo' her hair hab stopped fall
in' out, an' all she needs now am
"What fo' de broom?"
"To sweep it up wif."
"Say, Ah'd like to trabel in Eu
rope, but Ah'm afraid ob dat Bal
kan war cloud."
"How yo' talk man ain't dey
done quit fightin' about dat Bal
kan war cloud?"
"Yaas, but now dey're fightin'
about de silver linin'. Say, Ah
suppose yo' will be awful glad
when yo' wife gits back home?"
"Yo' bet Ah will. Why, Ah'd
be de happies' man alive ef she
wuz here right now."
"Well, dere's a woman comin'
down de street dis minute "
" but it ain't yo' wife."
"Gee, whiz, man, don't scare
me like dat again!"
"In order that the evening .may
not-pass without a little whole
some amusement, we will now
have some feats of legerdemain
by Prof. Tenspotte, the black ma
gician, or exponent of Black
Magic. Anyone having a valua
ble gold watch will please hand it
up to the professor and he will
make it disappear."
"Tommy," said his mother,
after he had ruthlessly broken a
whole boxful of toys, "you're a
naughty boy. Here you have
broken this box of toys which
cost $10. $10 gone like that! Do
you realize what that means?
Why, this poor working woman
in the kitchen only gets $1 for
working all day long. Think of
it, Tommy. Think how hard she
works for it, too."
Tommy looked serious for a'
moment, then his face brightened
and he said: "Mother, I think
you ought to give that woman