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Newspaper Page Text
' ENJOYING HIMSELE '
h A man who worked, in a mill
yveht out of his mind and was re
moved to the asylum. A fellow
worker, on passing the asylum
ohe day, saw Jimmy sitting in the
grounds, smoking his pipe.
"Hello, Jimmy I" he called.
"How are you getting-on?"
, "Oh, Ah'm getting on first-
-rate, thank you," answered Jim. -
Ah m very glad to hear it, lad.
You'll' be coming back to work
'What!" exclaimed Jimmy, in
grSa'ttsurprise. "Leave a big
housea'n'. a garden like this an'
come back to work? Do you think
ti m off- in my head? .
Professor I tell you the
phonograph is a great invention.
fcBupil 'Yes; it speaks for itself.
' (" - ' OH, YAAS, VJAlTAH,
.. f ( KINfcLY TOSS THIS )
V V SKIN OUT OF TXC Zs-J
A sharp-featured, determined
little woman popped her head out
of the door and indignantly de
manded the business of a bashful
young man who had been hang
ing around the-house for hours in
a pitiless downpour of rain, hop
ing against hope that his adored
one would invite him in.
"Now, then, young feller, what
do yer want here? Txyin' to wear
the pavement out, or what?" she
"I reckon I've "come a-courtin
your daughter,'" the shame-faced
"Oh, ye're after Lizzie, are yer j
Then take my advice, young man,
an' run away an' lose yerself. My
gal ain't goin' to marry a chap
that hasn't courage to knock at
the door an' ax for her not like
ly! Why, when her father came
a-courtin' me .an' found the door
locked he climbed .the backyard
wall, strangled the bulldog and
knocked the old man silly with a
dump oft the jaw. Then he
grabbed hold , of my hand an'
shoved 2.j 'ring. as big as a cart
wheel on my finger,,, and told me
that the banns were already up.
That's the sort of husband I want
for our Lizzie; not a shiverfn't"
milksop that .ain't got "sense io
come in out of the rain i"
He Why do, you say I'm the'
most obstinate person living?
She-r-jThis is the seventeenth
time you've, proposed tq me. He
Yes ; and what about your ob-
Utinacy, considering you've re-