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DADDY MEANT WELL
- Little Eva May was only a baby
Pgirl, buf she, jibbed when bedtime
It came round, as children will. '
Finally, rather offered to lie on the
hed till she fell asleep, andcarried her
off, greatly to mother's delight. j
The minutes passed ten, fifteen,
'iwATitv nnil at thft enfl hf "half an
&our mother began to wonder what
ad happened to father. She confin
ed with her sewing, but, in a few J
omenta, the silence was broken by
e pit-a-pat of jiaked feet.
Nearer came the steps, and an in-
nt later Eva May stood in the door-
ayi finger raised for silence.
If ""Ml've got daddy off to sleep at las;t!"
First Benedict Well, does this
weather suit "you? Second Ditto
Capital! capital! And you? First
Ditto I believe you my wife has
such a cold she can't speak. Second
r I Ditto-So has. mine.
TWO BIRDS ONE STONE
Norah hadarrived from Erin's Is? x
but a week, and was with difficulty
being "broken in" to the routine of
an English household. Cleanliness
was not a very strong point with her,
and her cooking, apart from "sRuds,"
was hardly all that could be desired.
"If you are not quite sure on any
point, come and ask me at once,"
said her mistress.
Dinner was just about to be served
when there was a clatter along the
hall, and the breathless Norah poked
her head round the dining-room
"Please, ma'am," she asked, "an'
how will I be knowin' when the pud
in' is done enough?"
"Stick a knife into it," said her
mistressKWith a resigned air. "If the
knife comes out clean, the pudding
is ready to serve."
"Yes, ma'am," said Norah; "ani
I'll be after that crathur that's boiliz'
'"And, oh, Norah" the mistresr.
had an afterthought "if the knife
does come out clean, you might stick
all the rest of the knives in the pud
AN ABSOLUTE SUCCESS? '
Jones was one of those men whose
constant desire it is to be agreeable
and who are ever ready to flatte.
When invited to inspect an inven
tion on which his nephew had spent
a whole year of hard study he be
came immensely" enthusiastic in his
praises. The machine was a most
complicated affair, possessing many
wheels and cranks and shafts, and,
after examining it most minutely,
Jones seized his nephew's hand and
wrung it so as to cause actual pain.
"My boy," he exclaimed, "you've
achieved a great success! It is-really
wonderful. All these wheels and
each in its proper place, running like
clockwork! An absolute success, my
boy an absolute success! And now
tell me what is it supposed to do?,
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