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'AN IMPOSSIBLE POST
I- With tense, eager faces, the great
' audience ot women leaned forward
.in their.seals, eagerly 'drinking in the
noted speaker's every wbrd.
"Mere man," she was saying, "is
"wont to belittle woman's ability to
enter the fields already usurped by
him., ,As a matter of fact, she is
"capable of filling any post of public
.or private office now held 1 man,
tand, if appointed to it, could even
(-perform man's tasks with greater
'faithfulness andrgreater daring.
"Nameif you can, one post for
"swhich she cannot fit herself! Name
ibne office to which she would not,
could not, give the greatest measure
Kof capability, the highest degree of
; courage, the
:1i A mere man, who Jiad slipped un
noticed into a back seat', rose at this
rpoint, and the light of sudden inspira
tion gleamed in his eye. .
t, "Rat catcher!" he shouted. And
then he fled. ' '
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CONTEMPT OF COURT
An amusing scene was recently en
acted in.a country court. The justice,
a big, pompous official, with a voice
like a trombone, took it upon himself
to examine a witness., a little, with
ered old man, whose face was as re.d
and wrinkled as a smoked herring.
"What is your name?" asked the
"Why, squire.'Lsaid the astonished
witness, "you know my name as well
as I know yourn."
'Tlever you mindwhat I knov, or
what I don't know," was the caution
given -with magisterial severity. "I
ask the question in my official ca-
it under oath."
With a contemptuous snort the
witness gave his name and the ques
"Where do you live?" x
"Why," he continued, appealing to '
the laughing listeners, "I've lived in ,
this town all my hfe, and so s he,
pointing to the justice, "an to hear
him go on you'd think "
"Silence!" thundered the irate
magistrate. "Answer my question,
or I'll fine you for contempt of court"
Alarmed by the threat, the witness
named his place of residence, and the
examination went on.
"What is your occupation?"
"What do you, do for a living?"
"Oh, git" out,' squire. Jest as if
you don't know that m a gardener."
"As a private-individual I do know
it, but as the court I know nothing
about it," said, the perspiring justice.
"Well, squire," remarked the puz
zled witness, "if .you know somethih'
outside the courtroom and don't
know nothing far ifyou'd better get
out .and let. somebody try this case
that's got sense."
And the witness was fined for con
tempt. b o
Warder Your wife's outside and
wants to see you. Prisoner Oh, telt
her I'm out