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George was caught napping.
A pair of soft little hands covered
his eyes and a sweet voice command
ed? "Guess who it Is!"
1 Nothing very dreadful for George
to this, you think; but, then, you
'don't - know that George has two
.sweethearts, and for the lifeof him
couldn't decide whose voice lt was,
which made It a very embarrassing
situation for him. A wrone euess
LVould lead to complications awiul to
think of. But a happy thought in
spired George, and he announced:
Z "It's the dearest, sweetest little eirl
' Tn all the world,"
"Oh, you lovely boy!" gurgled the
.satisfied one1 as she removed her
"Did vou make'va hit with vrmr
Speech at the banquet last night?" "I
Cst pancy so. I forgot what I Intended to
-fsay, and said what I ought not to
fe I . HAr You no ..
UUh Qja -"
WH THEY MARRIED
JPostcards having been sent out to
married men with the inquiry, "Why
did you marry?" a large number of
responses came to hand, from which
the following is a selection:
"That's what I have been trying
for eleven years to find out. X."
"Married to get square with her
mother, but never have.. W."
"Because Sarah told me that five
other young men had proposed to
"The father thought eight years'
courtin' was almost long enough.
"I was tired of buviner resents and
fgoing to theaters and concerts, and
wanted a rest. Have saved money.
"Please don't Btir me up. J."
-"Because I thought she was one
among a thousand; now I sometimes
think she is a tbouBandvamong one.
"Because I did not have the ex
perience I have now. G."
"Tha't'a the same question that my
friends ask me. C. H."
"Because I had more jboney than
I knew what to do with. Now I have
more to do than I have money with.
"I wanted-a companion of the op--posite
sex. p, S, She is still opposite,-
"Because it is just my luck.
1 yearned for company. We now
have it all the time-. KarL"
"I married to get the best wife In
the world. Simon."
"Because I asked her If she'd have
me. She said she would. She's got
"Have exhausted all the .figures in
the arithmetic to figure out an an
swer to your question; between mul
tiplication and division In the family,
and distraction, in addition, the an
swer is hard to arrive at. Old Man."
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