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HARDLY THE SAME FALL
Young Hopkins had lately returned from border wa--fare
In India, and was being rather "lionized" among h
particular set in society. Invitations rained on him; but he
did not accept them eagerly, for, seeing that he had been so
long in the wilds, he did not find it easy to make topical con
versation. He was dining this particular night at a superior offi
cer's residence, and found his dinner partner to be his host's
The lady did not seem to him to be particularly intelli
gent; but Hopkins tried his hardest to make conversation,
and thought a few of his fighting experiences might interest
"It was & narrow "squeak," he informed her, at the con
clusion of one incident. "I. had a horse shot under me!"
"Dear me!" the lady replied, in a rather bored (one.
"What was the, matter with it?"
Despairingly the officer looked at her, but made an
other attempt to raise the flagging conversation.
"We're a fighting family, you know," he Observed. "My
great-grandfather fell at Waterloo!"
"What a coincidence!" she rejoined. "Something like
that happened in our family. My grandfather fell at Pad
dirigton slipped on a piece of orange peelj"
TAMING THE BEAR
Ten p. m.: "Things" were busy at thi
office; and, despite the lateness of the hour,
the staff were still at work.
The head df the firm looked sternly for
a minute at the young man over his gold
rimmed glasses. Then
"So you've a complaint to make, have
you?" he asked fiercely.
"Not exactly a complaint, sir," said the
other; "but there is just one little matter
about which I should like to speak to you."
"I gave you more money the other day "
growled the did gentleman. "What's it you
want this time? Shorter hours eh?"
"Oh, no, no, sir! I do not feel it incum
bent on me I assure you, in any way to
tamper with our present quite excellent
chronological system. For my part, I am
perfectly content that the hours should re
tain their present length. All I wish Is er
fewer of them as applied to my daily period
A Woman Woke her husband during a
storm the other night, and said; "I do wish
you would stop snoring, for I want to hear it
hear It thunder."
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