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Newspaper Page Text
GOT HIS FOOT IN IT
Mr. Lucian Fitzgerald's right foot
"went to sleep on him two days ago
and he has never since been able to
wake it It pesters him severely.
Danville (Ky.) Advocate.
Seems quite natural that one's foot
should go "to sleep on him."
THERE'S A REASON
l&MME A GtASS OK WATEftX
AN A BEAN. PE. GOTTA
He does not drink now with.the boys;
. He's cut out all cabaret joys;
He has sworn off on his cigar;
He rides not in the trolley car;
He lingers no more at the spot
"Where flourishes the gay jack pot;
He isn't stingy no, not he;
He doesn't like economy,
But hell be wed in, balmy June
And need dough for the honeymoon.
Quite a few in this neighborhood
$ ihave had the measles, but are expect-
ed to be much improved by this writ
ing. Huntsmanvflle (Mo.) Herald.
Why is it always a "big policeman"
in. the newspapers? And a "pretjy
, stenographer," a "beautiful .society
.woman," a "brawny negro" and a
"dainty little actress? "
"Nature built Judge Taft largely,"
Cleveland (O.) Press.
. Who huilt the rest of iim?,
WIND AND. RAIN "
Alas, the weather's wet again!
The clerk has changed his mind,
And searching wind and driving rain
Have left the sun behind.
We shiver for the wind Is" chill,
And wrap our cloaks more closely
But stay, the clouds are racing past,
Revealing gaps of blue;
Behold, the skies are clearing fast,
The sun is peeping through.
And now his rays have reappeared,
We feel inordinately cheered.
Come wind and rain, for you impart
A joy I love to win;
Come, sweep the cobwebs from my
And let the sunshine in.
Blow hard, I pray, and leave no room
For heart or mind to harbor gloom.
AS GOOD AS NEW
"George, I made a lovely discovery
"Did 'you? And what was it?" in
quired her husband.
"You remember that nice, leather
bound account book you gave me for
a Christmas present the year before
last the one in whiclj I "was to keep
account of every penny I spent?"
"Well, I found it this morning, and
what do you think? It's still as good
as new!' I never wrote a single thing
in it except my name!"
He loved her with a burning love,
Her.heart, too, was aflame,
And he was fired also when.
nJ" mi ffr ' -"-