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Wl'JlefcO ARK SWWLY) 8 . tlil
o r tepe vtra ) Hk. ooP
AS MAN TO MAN
"Dick, I never thought my little
boy would tell his mother a false
hood!" exclaimed the mother in the
kind of voice.
" 'Twasn't really a story," mutter
ed Dick, with downcast countenance.
"I didn't run in the road, but only in
"This makes it worse. Half a story
is worse than a whole one, as I've
told you often. And now I feel it to
be my duty to punish you- severely."
This duty, be it said, the mother
performed most conscientiously,
"When father returned home, there
fore, in the evening, he found Dick
looking very red-eyed and disconso
late. "Why, my poor little man," he ask
ed, "what is the matter?"
"Nuffing," sniffed Dick.
"But something must be wrong,
sonny. Tell me."
"Oh, well, if you want to know,"
said Dick, with a scowl, 'Tve just
had an awful tow with your wife!"
. TO THE MANNER BORN
Jane was a country girl, born and bred; and it happened
that, on the very day on which she took her first situation, and
became housemaid to Sirs. Robinson, the tatter's cook was
seized by a sudden illness.
On the following morning, therefore, Mrs. Robinson asked
the new maid if she could manage to fry some bacon.
"Arid, by the by," she added, "you might also poach half
a dozen eggs."
"Very well, ma'am," replied Jane. "I can do thatall right."
A few minutes later Mrs Robinson went to the kitchen to
see how the maid was performing her unaccustomed duties.
Nowhere could the gin be found, until presently she came
r tripping into the house, wearing her hat and jacket, smiling
"I'v& got 'em all right, ma'am !" she exclaimed exultantly.
"Six beauties! What do you mean?"
"Eggs, nia'am." y
"But there are plenty of eggs in the house; thercwas no
need to buy more."
'Lor. I didn't buy 'em. I poached 'em. Why, bless you,
ma'am," she added confidingly, "my father and brothers have
been at the game years. And, you can take it from me, what I
don't know about it isn't worth knowing!"