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Newspaper Page Text
AN OLD CASE
Sign in a locat barber shop: "Bath.
15 cents. Pool, 5 cents." Why not
take a plunge in the "pool" and save
A Sunday school teacher, who had
asked his class what weapon Sam
son used to slay the Philistines, and
failed to -get an answer, sought to
assist the young ones by tapping his
jaw with his finger, saying at the
same time, "What is this?" Promptly
came the response, "The jawbone of
an ass, sir!"
"Madam, I should like to sell you
our book on 'Electricity for the
"Thanks, but I don't care for light
Purchaser But is the parrot a
good bird' I mean, I hope he doesn't
use dreadful language. Dealer 'E's
a saint, lady; sings 'ymns beautiful.
I 'ad some parrots wot used to swear
something awful, but, if you'll be
lieve me, lady, this 'ere bird convert
ed the lot.
Fred There seems to be a lot
more fuss made of Miss A 's
singing than Miss K 's, and I am
sure Miss K has by far the richer
voice. Jack Ah, yes; but Miss
The Doc Is your dyspepsia of
long standing? "
Patient Yes, it's a chronic case,
Doc. I've been married thirty years.
A Scottish farmer's son had the
misfortune to fall in love with two
young ladles at once. The one was
a tall, strapping girl, while the other
was small and slim. The puzzled
lover at last asked his father's ad
vice. "Well," said hisfather, "there's
sa.e muckle machinery used In farm
in' nowadays that a big, active wife
is no' o' muckle use; so I advise ye
to tak1 the little ane she'll eat less,
Pajamas will no more be seen
In good society.
One reason Is they're out oi style,
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