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Gladys had been naughty, bo
naughty, in fact, that hef mbther
wad forced to have recourse to the
time-honored and only really effec
tive rented? In such cases.
THIS Operation being Successfully
but bainiuliy completed, the little girl
sarife ifltd her1 mother's" lap dlscdn
solateiy. "Jfamma," Bhe fobbed,, ''did
gran'ma spank you -when you waB
"3fe, dear,' when t wag naughty."
A minute's" pauBe, then:
"And did her mother," continued
Gladys, "Spank her?"
"And was she spanked, too, when
sne WaB naughty?"
4- Gladys gave a sigh of despair".
"Then who did start the silly cus
tom?" she asked.
UNSPORTING OF THEM
Pat hated London. The traffic in
the great metropolis bewildered him,
and, as he stood in a crdwded thor
oughfare one day perilously Wedged
between a stream of motof-vehlcles
traveling in one direction ahd a IMe
Of cars traveling in the other, he
would have given anything to be
Safely back in Ireland.
Thanks more to luck than judg
ment he lust managed to dodge a
large touring motor-car, ahd was
about to offer up a grateful little
prayed, when suddenly he found
himself Bprawling oh the ground.
Tlie car, in fact, when swerving
to avoid the defenceless obstruction
in the roadway, had skidded, attd the
back part of it, swinging round, had
knocked down the hapleSs Son of
Presently, aided by a policeman,
he sat Up, and, rubbing his. sore
head, addressed the assembled eon
pany of spectators.
"Now, phwat d6 ye think of that?"
he asked. "Whin ye stand in front
of thim, they fun over ye; and whin
ye step aside to let thim pass, they
turn round and kick ye!"
o o- w
The Way It's Done.
"NoW, waiter Said the fiBW "cus
tomer in a certain .restaurant of the
less fashionable type, "I want an
Oyster stew and I want you to give
the cook particular directions. The
milk must be carefully heated first
just short of boiling. Then oysters
must be added without the juice
That must not be put in until the
seasoning is added. As for the
oysters, I want Mill Ponds. Use the
best milk and gift-edged creamery
butter. Now, do you think you un
derstand?" "Yis-sir," said the
waiter. And he Went to the kitchen
wicket and yelled I "Ptit on one!"
Visitor You have a -fine road iead
lng from the Btation. suburbs
That's the path Worn by seraaft