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Newspaper Page Text
BOTH COT SOMETHING
ft sJo ASJ
Gary, Ind. Following sermon by
rector of Holy Angels' parish advis
ing young people of the parish to
marry, seven couples asked that wed
ding bans be announced.
There was a young waitress named
Who carried a plate of mock turtle,
When, strange to relate,
She tripped, and the plate
That once was mock turtle turned
SHE HAD A REASON
"Mable is going to be a blonde this
"They raised the price of dark hair
and brunette powder."
One evening, after the flies had
een unusually troublesome, an. Irish
mistress spread insect powder round
the windows and other places in the
kitchen where the flies congregated.
In the morning she asked the serv
ant girl if there were not a great
many dead flies in the kitchen. "Yes,
there are, mum," replied the maid.
"The ropm's alive with thim!"
He sued to break his father's will. '
He'd left a fortune great
The young man got the verdict and
His lawyers the estate. '
Corporal (to soldier) Why is the
blade of the saber curved instead 'of
straight? Soldier It is curved in 1
order to give more force to the blow- ,
Corporal Humbug! The saber is :
curved so as to fit the scabbard. If '
it was straight how would you get it
mto the crooked scabbard, block- r
Do you note, young man, the ab
stemiousness of the truly great?
Teddy, milk only; Bryan, grape juice r
When Shimmerpate arrived home I
an hour later than usual he was nib-
bling a clove. "I stopped in a concert
hall for a few moments," he observed. T
"The music was intoxicating."
"That's right!" exclaimed his better
half. "Blame it on the music."
BE CAREFUL, GIRLS!
He stood far out upon the limb 3
And she, fair gir stood under.
He tossed the cherriesdown to her.
She ate away hke thunder.
Some jits she swallowed. That is why
Of an appendix she is shy,