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Newspaper Page Text
: 7VEU, 1 (SOT IH'-n.
; JMtTOUDT OSdAR HEAlHfi RQ
- 1 ME. HE V1LL NEVER KNOW J f-Y
I iL T' Too dot von uttia y A c I
ptQi.ASS of BeeR-()c- J I
DODGING THE ISSUE
Hv'-Jones picked up his hat and left
p Lthe office a few days ago during
Is "I've got to go to the station," he
explained, to meet my wife's elder
'Sister. She's coming to stay with
I v jdul wuy meet uer : bumeunt:
laSTted. "You live onlv two doors
from the station.
XliiDO bUQ HOJ i
Surely she can't
"Yes." replied Jones: "that's what
my wife says. But I'd rather meet
her at the station, you know. If I
.actus uer m puuuc, juu see, i tua.u i
lave to kiss her."
fj. o o
''"AThe 1910 censuses and estimates
( nearly two billion, or about 40 per
square mue. it is calculated mat ten
es this number could be supported
3f-&s densely Dlaced on the 30 million
KSguare miles of good land as in Bel-
WHEN OUT OF STOCK
"How much a pound are you
sausages? inquired a sharp-featured
little woman of the pork butcher.
"Der brice vas gone ups," ges
ticulated the shopman. "I vill haf to
sharge you 15 cents."
"Nonsense!" said the httle woman.
"Such imposition! Why, I can get
them at Shaubaum's for 12 cents!"
"Veil, madam, vy don't you do so?"
"Don't be impudent, my good man!
He was out of them."
"Ah, veil," smiled the butcher, "ef
I vas out of dem, I vood let you haf
dem for 12 cents, too, madam!"
THE OBVIOUS SOLUTION
"Nowboys," said the schoolmas
ter, "here is another problem for you.
There are five children in a family,
but it so happens that there are"only
four potatoes in the house. What is
the mother to do so as to give all her
children equal portions?"
, Silence reigned in the class. Eac'i
of the pupils sat thinking Intently
then, to the delight of the master, the
youngest and smallest of them stood
up, eager to give an answer.
"Well, Tommy?" he asked.
"Please, sir," replied the boy,
"mash the potatoes!"
A NARROW SHAVE
"By Jove, I had a narrow escape
"Well, four of us were lunching
together, and, of course you knov
how one has to on that sort of occa
sion we each insisted on stumping
up and paying the bill."
"Yes," remarked his friend. "But
what about that narrow escape?"
"That's just it For a minute or
two it looked very much as though
I'd overplayed the game and the oth
er three really were going to leave
me with that bill to pay!" -
Though France has an abundant
supply of electric nergy, electric
signs seem to be so far lacking.