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Newspaper Page Text
mscr Wi Pciee iss a noble
J srruiKBIN OF J7EX HOOTCH- I
WA-COOCH TRIBE. No DOUBT )
f HE- CAM QiV6 ME. SOWEDIMQS
"" i ricacnvip(Qi
5 - -- y
'HOIST WITH HIS OWN PETARD
"I'm afraid," said the inspector,
"that children are not so observant
as they used to be."
"You think so?" asked the urchin.
"I haven't noticed it."
"No? Then I will prove It to you.
Now," he continued, turning to the
class, "someone give me a number."
"Thirty-seven!" a little girl ex
The inspector wrote "73" on the
board. Nothing was said.
"Now," he added, "someone rive
me another number."
'Fiftv-sfiven !" said n littln tmina f
. ! the back of the room.
i The insoector wrote "75" nn tho
yg -(hoard and smiled in a superior way
rjr at tne teacner wnen nomine: was
.Raid. Then Vie rnllpr! fnn-n fhltvl ,.
Wber, but fairly gasped when a little
Seventy-seven and see if vnn
WHAT WAS THE DINNER LIKE?
Mrs. Keene was very much a bride;
in fact, she had only just been mar
ried and knew absolutely nothing
about household matters. Imagine
consternation, then, when her cook
left her suddenly on the morning of
the very day that four quests were
expected to arrive for dinner.
Of course, Mrs. Keene rushed
round; and managed to procure a
temporary maid. But to prepare din
ner for six proved to be a task alto
gether beyond the newcomer's abili
ties. So, descending to the kitchen,
where she found the girl struggling
with a coffee machine, the mistress
volunteered to be of some assistance.
"Now, what can I do first?" she
"Well, mum," confessed the maid,
"I haven't washed the lettuce yet.
You might do that"
"All right, Delia," said Mrs. Keene
"But please keep calm and I will help
you. Now, you get on with the cof
fee. I'll wash the lettuce."
A moment later:
"Delia, where have you put the
Knickerbockered and resplendent
in dazzling tartan stockings, Alger
non sauntered from the club-hqjise
to the golf links; and there, on the
first tee, having carefully adjusted his
monocle and "addressed" the ball for
a prodigious length of time, began
"By the way, caddie," he remarked
presently, "what sort of a game does
Mr. McJones play?"
The diminutive young Scotchman
screwed up his weather-beaten face.
"Mr. McJones? He canna play at
"Ah!" said Algernon. 'You see,
I'm playing a match with him tomor
row. Suppose I shall beat him easily
The caddie shook his head wisely.
can write that backwards!"
Na. he reDlied. "that ve will nnt.
AlJAJ.m.w,.,. ,-. - - - .