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Newspaper Page Text
Now comes the Inter-Ocean de
manding that council end the tele
phone bother by giving the telephone
companies everything they ask for.
Just what one might expect from that
degenerate old organ of special
Hoyne needn't worry about those
Tribune attacks. The people of Chi
cago are getting wise to the rule-or-.
ruin policy of that newspaper bully
The only reason It isn't on the un
fair list of organized labor is that
labor concluded to lick one news
paper at a time. The Trib's time will
Postmaster General Burleson will
put into effect on Aug. 15 reduced
rates on the parcel post and will also
increase the size of packages. This
means that the express trust loses
out and Uncle Sam wins.
Under the rates as they are the
revenue of the Chicago postoffice in
creased 21.63 per cent. But under
the new rates that increase will go
much higher; and soon there may be
some express wagons for sale.
Rev. Stephen Nettles, editor, says.
in the Southern Christian Advocate
that from a moral standpoint it would
be better for women to go nude than
to continue the present suggestive
way of dressing. But then it's warm
in South Carolina, where. Nettles
writes his editorials; and Jerry
O'Connor isn't the censor there.
At that,' Rev. Nettles may have
seen September Morn and like the
looks of the lady.
Some folks who are violently op
posed to dancing are too old to dance
themselves; or too awkward. Be
sides they belong to the class who
are always worrying about the
morals o others.
After splashing around in the Re
publican newspapers a bit, Dave
Pfaelzer has swum back into Demo
cratic waters and quit spouting. Dave
must have thought for a minute he
was a whale.
The new inspector of Chicago's
morals is 27 - years old young
enough to have red blood in his
veins and not see evil in every en
joyment of people who want to be
His name is Wm. Dannenberg, and
we imagine when he and Jerry
O'Connor and Maje Punkhouser get
through inspecting our morals we
ought to pass muster and begin to
sprout wings. We can feel 'em com
One suggestion, however. Let the
three of 'em begin by inspecting one
another. When satisfied they are all
pure and wholly good, then they can
begin on the rest of us.
And finally Chicago's favorite out
door sport will be croquet and we will
spend the evenings playing authors.
But husbands and wives will have
to get out of the habit of holding
hands. Or go down in the cellar
where the moral cops won't see 'em.
. o o
CAN'T PLEASE 'EM
A o rt
"I cannot live without yo"u, love,"
Was his wild, pleading cry.
"Oh, very well then," said the girl,
"I will not let you die."
The sfory ends in manner sad,
For now he wishes that she had.