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Newspaper Page Text
"BOSSY" SHOULD WORRY ABOUT
A REAR-END COLLISION
Hey diddle, .diddle, she stood in the
Of the track and the car hit her
& And after the jolt, the cow didn't
V "bolt," N
But sat placidly chewing her cud.
Street car tracks; Chicago avenue
and North Forty-sixth avenue; cow;
street car; ZOWIE; wrecking train;
business of rescue; fence post and
rope for cow; two bells for street car;
That's the story if you're in a hur
ry. Here it is, if you've got a little
"Bossy," a perfectly polite, well
meaning and evidently tramp Jersey
cow,, was walking the ties down the
North avenue car line near North
Forty-sixth avenue. She either real
ized her likeness to a brick wall or
Anyhow, she stopped one of the
North avenue cars in somewhat of a
rude manner. The car caught
"bossy" square and when all was
quiet the front truck of said car rest
ed on the portion of "bossy" that, on
a boat, is known as the stern.
Passengers and the car crew were
very much upset. "Bossy" merely
sized the situation up in a glance and
then went on chewing that week's
cud. - .
The wrecking crew arrived and
raised the weight off tbe'cow.
' Kind-hearted persons led. the cow
to a near-by pasture and tied her to
ft a post. The car went on Its way.
P. S. It is rumored that "bossy"
strained her milk.
THE MEXICAN SITUATION
Washington, Aug. 4. The Mexi
can situation is clearing up.- After
a conference with Secy. Bryan by
Pres. Wilson it was made known .that
the president considers intervention
not only an impossibility, but not
even a remote possibility.
If mediation fails there will be a
first hand investigation of causes of
the revolution, and as a last resort
the U. S. will remove the prohibition
against supplying arms. -
The resignation of Ambassador
Henry Lane Wilson will probably be
BIG REDUCTIONS IN EXPRESS
RATE ON PARCELS ORDERED
Washington, Aug. 4. Sweeping
reductions In express rates in parcels
all over-the country were ordered to
day by the interstate commerce com
mission, to become effective Oct. 15.
The reductions range from 10 to 60
per cent, relieving shippers from ex
For two years the rates are to be
experimental, and if the loss to ex
press companies isn't too great they
will then become permanent.
Reduction of the high cost of living
is. aimed at by the commission. Rates
on articles of food and drink are to
be only 75 per cent of ordinary first
class rates. Rates on newspapers and
magazines not much changed.
All rates are to be simplified from
900,000,000 separate rates to' a block
or zone system of less than 650,000
A permanent committee of express
company representatives and mem
bers of the commission to revise
routes is also ordered.
The big thing in the new order Is
the modification on small parcels.
The commission says the express
companies give away $2,000,000
worth of free service yearly through
London women have taken to
smoking cigars. If those suffragets
take to vigorously adopting men's
habits they'll bring parliament to its
Young doctor Ah, I find it very
hard to get on in my profession!"
His wife Do not despair, my dear;
you'll succeed if you only have