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Newspaper Page Text
DAILY COMMENT ON
Probably if Geo. P. Bent were to sit
down to one of his Crown pianos the
tune he would play would be:
"If you ain't got no money you
needn't come aroun'."
But it may be Bent's piano train
ing that leads him te want the
Tribune to be an organ of big busi
ness. One of those organs that plays
when you put money in the slot And
the advertising department is the
When Bent wrote that stuff he is
sending business men about the
Tribune he must have been mad
enough to bite Jim Keeley on the
Editor Si. O'Donnell, one of leading
Hearst editors, will make his bow to
the public Monday, when his trades
union edition of the Examiner, with
out the union label, will appear.
It would be interesting now to hear
the financial report of the Illinois
Equal Suffrage League on that spe
cial suffrage edition.
All of us who helped boost it along
naturally feel interested in knowing
how it panned out financially.
Then later we'll get a report on
that trades union edition mebbe.
The Chicago Association of Com
merce will now beg Sec'y of War
Garrison to leave Fort Sheridan on
the map and not take the sojer boys
away from dear old Chicago.
However, Uncle Sam has our per
mission to take the soldiers away and
also the darned old fort.
What the dickens does Chicago
need with either a fort or a lot of
The injuns ain't going to attack
us. No danger of a flock, covey, herd
or bunch of wild buffalo overrunning
The Japs would have to cross the
Rockies before they could get at-us.
And the Mex would have to conquer
a few states south before we would
be in danger.
PEOPLE AND THINGS
There's no danger from the north,
and none from the east. So what do
we want with either troops or fort?
Nobody will give the real reason
Big Business wants both the fort
and the soldiers, unless it is that they
want soldiers handy to shoot work
ingmen into submission if it should
By the way, lads, Herm Kohlsaat
let out a yell for help in this morn
ing's Inter-Ocean, intimating that
business is bad and that Big Business
had better come across with more ad
vertising or he may fly the coop.
Herm's right. He has fought the
good fight for the plutes, and they
ought to load him up with advertis
ing whether anybody reads it or not.
Plutocracy should never commit
the crime of ingratitude. When the
Inter-Ocean passes the hat, the plutea
should come across. Where's Julius
O goody! We almost forgot Geo.
P. Bent. The Ocean is just the kind
of paper he needs about the house.
The very place for George to adver
tise Crown pianos. Go to it, George.
And Grape Nuts Postum of Battle
Creek ought to take a page ad daily
advertising fresh Battle Creek saw
dust for plutes with tender stom
achs and patent medicine coffee for
If Rosenwald has nothing to ad
vertise he might show his good will
by hiring a street car and taking the
Inter-Oecan subscribers out for a
nice ride, or give each subscriber a
pair of smoke inspector shoes.
That would be real philanthropy
and would get Jule's name in the
By the way, why doesn't the Trifc
drop something itself in -the hat foi
that special grand jury? Isn't it get
ting its money's worth?
When you buy your fall clothes
Get a ring for your nose,
For in France it is swell
To thus ring the belle.