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v VESS, T ISS
rip DER PROPELLER. .;
WHAT'S IN A NAME?
"' A hungry diner in a restaurant or
dered a -chicken pie. When it was
brought he raised the paste and look
ed at the contents intently for a
While. Then he called the waiter.
"Look here, sir," he said. "What
did I order?"
"Chicken pie, sir.
"Andrwhat have you brought me?"
."Chicken pie, sir."
"Chicken pie!" the customer ex
tclaimed. "Chicken pie! Why, there's
.not a piece ofchicken In'it, and never
. "That's right, sir. There ain't no
J chicken in it." "
. "Then why do you call it chicken
pie? I never heard of such a thing."
"That's all right. . There don't have
to be chicken in a chicken pie. There
. ain't no dog in a "dog biscuit, is there?
vAnd there ain't a cottage in cottage
A TROPICAL YARN -
"Buns give me the creeps," said
the sailor. ,
"Why?" asked the vicar.
"Wei, once we were bound for5
China, with self-raising flour and
currants. We struck on a rock, and,.i
having no boats, it looked all up. But
the flour started workm', an' it froth-'
ed up through the natchways and
sizzled over the side in big lumps, )
which got baked hard by the sun-and, .
bobbed about like tremendous buns.
I got aboard a big one, although the
water swarmed with sharks. They
started eating the edges of the bun.
Daily it 'grew less, until I was
cramped. Then I got washed ashore
with only two-bites left. Now I never
see buns without a shiver. If you of
fered me a pint o' bjer.an a pork
pie, now " ,... v "(
, But "the vicar fled. '-,;- A
c o " . !
KEPT HIS WORD
"My dear," said a business man to
his wife, as he was starting for the
office, "don't expect me home very
early tonight, as I will have to dictate
"All right," was the response, "but
I wisn you wouldn't work so hard."
He left his office at the usual hour,
went to the club, and sat down at the
card table with three others.
"Just amoment, you fellows, be
fore we 'deal the cards. I've got to
keep my word with my wife. One of
you -must take, down what I dictate:
A, b, c, d, e, f,'g, h, i, j, k, 1, m, n, o,
p, q, r, s, t, u, v, w, x, y, z.' There,
those letters are off my mind."
Dr. Blank was once called to a
butcher's shop to examine some meat
that had been condemned by the
medical officer of health as unfit for
human consumption. When the case
came on for hearing in the.local po- s
lice court one of the witnesses, a
butcher, waa-asked: "Who were pres
ent when the meat was examined?"
MTV,. Tllonlr o-nA o minVher nf nth or
;puddinVas: 1 knowsof."
butchers," he replied. J,
,. i -'l.'y-ytm.