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h MEMBER. OF WV RETCHMENT
I5 Auiomooitc ow-tronr,
l-v - 7-"
I v- (ViODtSTtV)-EXCEPT ME, J J
SHE COULDN'T SWIM
Barbara, aeed six. had entoyed her
self tremendously at the exhibition to
which her mother had taken her.
There was only one thing more that
&he wanted to do, and that was to go
for a trip In one of the gondolas that
Boated on the artificial lake.
J" Her mother was, therefore, very
surprised when they arrived at the
Janding stage to see a loolj of terror
g&ome over the child's face.
J'Whv 'Rarhara." she said, "what's
the matter? Don'tyou want to go
!,on the lake now?"
'- "No, I don't'." said Barbara decid-
dly;.rand I won't!"
"Why not, dear? You're not fright
ened, are you."
"Yes, I am. Look what it says up
Over the ticket office was a notice,
mo the motner reaa:
c "Come for a trip around the lake!
Ladies and gentleman, only 25c each.
IXfihlldren thrown in!". i
THE LAST STRAW
An electric bell rang. Brown
sprang from his stool and passed into
the chief's room. The chief frowned:
"Why did not Smith come when I
rang?" he asked.
"He's not here today, sir," faltered
Brown, standing nervously on one
"Another wedding?" asked the
"No, sir no. He is attending the
christening of his sister's firstborn,"
said Brown trying to look sentl
tnental. "Oh, indeed! All right, Brown.
Just file these letters, please."
Left alone, the chief frowned
again. There had been too many
weddings, christenings and funerals
lately. He sat lost in a brown study.
Noiselessly the door opened, and
the office boy's freckled face looked
in. "He entered and walked sound
lessly over the thick carpet to the big
man's desk. The chief looked up:
"Well, what do you want?"
"Please, sir, my grandmother " ,
This was too much.
"Grandmother, indeed! Go back
to your work, boy!"
"Has died, sir, and"
"Nonsense! I can't spare you today.
Go back to your work!"
"Has left me a lot of money, so I've
come to resign. See?"
And the boy walked oiit, slamming
the door behind him.
Brown and Slimson, traveling
salesmen, met on the train.
"I have Just come from Birming
ham, where I did a tremendous busi
ness," saUl Slimson. "How much do
you think I sold?"
"How should I know?" replied
"Of course you don't know; but
what do you guess?"
"Oh, about half."
"Half of what?" r
. "WAy, half of what yousayA;