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Newspaper Page Text
'I HEN SHE LET HIM GO
"Pray, do not rise," she said as an
old man rose to give her a seat in the
"But I " began the oldman.
"No, please don't," and she gently
pushed the old man back into his seat
r After the street car had gone a
tbjbck the old man attempted again
f. "I beg" of you, sir, please don't."
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$ly gloved hand once more rested on
his shoulder as she gently pushed him
After two more blocks the old man
made a third attempt, but once more
1the zirl persisted.
if "Really, I don't mind it, sir," she
"Thaf s all very well for you, miss,"
said the old man. "But I do. I want
to eet out I've ridden three blocks
'beyond my street already!" N. Y.
AfSAV vm-Tirr mp s. SPEAKING v.
SSj TO AN OFFICER
Wr ) WrrHOOT BEING J
' n"i m Hi i.j spoKeN t j
TOMMY BROWN AGAIN
The referee's whistle had blown for
the last time. The match was over,
and immediately the crowd of specta
tors began to swarm around the
small gate which was the only exit
from the football grpund.
Robert Peeler, posted more or less
securely near the gate, endeavored to
restrain the crowd with 'Tass on,
please," "Don't push, there," and
other words of advice, encourage
ment and kindly warning.
Even so, it was only very slowly
that the crowd around the gate di
minished and began to file cheerfully
down the road beyond.
Delays of this sort were by no
means to the liking" of Master Tom
my Brown, who, in order to acceler
ate his own departure, proceeded
nimbly to scale the walL While he
was perilously balanced on the top
amid the bits of broken glass which
lay there thick, Robert Peeler no-i
"Hi, lad!" shouted the policeman.
"Come down from there, and go out
the same way that you came in!"
"Right-oh, guv-nor!" cried Master
Tommy. "That's just what I'm do
ing!" And a moment later he was
running down the road.
FOOLING EACH OTHER
Pat and Mike, just after their ar
rival in America, went into a restau
rant. On the table was a bowl of
mustard and Pat took a big spoon
ful and put it into his mouth. The
tears began to roll down his cheeks.
"Pat what are you crying for?"
"I just remembered," said Pat
"that exactly a year ago today me
old uncle was hung in Ireland."
Mike by this time had a spoonful
of mustard in his mouth and the tears
began to roll down his cheeks, too.
"What are you crying forj'Mike?"
"Because you were not hung wii
your uncle," gasped Mike. Fuel