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THE EARLY BIRD
The brass plate on his door pro
claimed to the world at large, and the
.people of Plpton in particular, that
Binks was an architect.
Z, Binks had been six months hvPip-
Hon, and though he had felt sure of
rdoing great things, had only built a
dog kennel for his landlord and over
drawn his account at the bank.
One nighl:, however, at about 11
o'clock he might have been seen tear-
hing along the deserted streets to the
outskirts of Pipton, where resided
jMr. MacAllco, the big local draper.
r i The. house was in darkness when
$le arrived, but his energetic use of
tfie knocker soon brought Mr. Mac
Alico to the door.
- "Good-evening!" panted Binks. "I
raave Just come to ask if vou wish me
fto design a new front for your place
f" "Confound you for waking melup,
'you idiot! Certainly not! My shop
front is perfectly satisiactoryi anfl
will last out your BfethneF
"Oh, no, it wont!" retorted Bink
"For it was knocked into smither
eens about half an hour ago by a
The contract was signed the nexij
TAKING EVERY PRECAUTION
Getting the stout old lady's lug
gage on the cab proved a very much,
easier task than getting the aforesaid
stout old lady into the cab. 'Even the
tired old horse condescended once to
turn his head and witness the inter-,
Atlast, however, allTvasTeady for
a start all bar the horse, whom
John, whip in hand, was endeavoring
to rouse from heavy slumber. Just
then the stout old lady poked her
head through the window. "
"Now, cabman, I wish yaa to be ex
tremely careful, especially going
down hill; and if you come to a cross
ing, you must wait till the policeman
tells you to go on; and "
"All right, mum," broke- in the
"cabby." "Ill be very careful, mum
But, by the way, mum, in case of an
accident, mum, which hospital -would
you like to be took to?"
Reginald de Bacchus, profligate
son of a millionaire soapmaker, sat
up in bed and begged for water.
"This is the end of my social ca
reer," he moaned. "I drank too much
last night at the ball and staggered
" 'ardlysir, 'ardly," murmured his
valet, apologetically. ''Heveryone's
praising you for inventing a new
dance.' Brooklyn Life.
"Does your boy John take any in
terest in the farm?" f
"I should say so! It's the only
place on earth where he can get three
meals a day-without payin' fur 'em."
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