Search America's historic newspaper pages from 1836-1922 or use the U.S. Newspaper Directory to find information about American newspapers published between 1690-present. Chronicling America is sponsored jointly by the
National Endowment for the Humanities and the Library of Congress. external link Learn more
Image provided by: University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign Library, Urbana, IL
Newspaper Page Text
(rDERMCA&OH; 1 START IN BLENTV
ECTET MIDDLE BERTH ON V&.
-jiw-vj --" mji im nmjojwcrc
An Englishman who was visiting
some friends in. Kentucky was im
pressed by .the military titles of the
men to, whom he was introduced. Al
mostreverybody was a "colonel." One
day. he 'was walking the street in
.company with a'friend who addressed
a passing" gentleman as General."
i'Whydo you call him General?" the
Englishman asked. v "Oh, just be
cause 'he is nothing in .particular!"
was the .reply. . -
. . o o
. y. . HE KNEW,
Bobbie was pulling the dog's tail
4when hTsTaunt said: "You" mustn't do
tnat, HODDie. ie win Diie,you."
"Oh, no," Said Bobbie "Dogs don't
bite at' this, end."
"Men are always late! 1 have
-waited "hee, since seven o'clock for
inythifsband, and it Is now-' half-past
eight," 'And when were you to meet
him'; i At nve ocjocj:..
He was a stranger in the town, and
was objiojusly looking for an ad
dress. But he went about it in that
half-ashamed way peculiar to shy
people, as though the mere fact of
being a stranger were a crime of the
worst description. Some people are
He wasgetting hopeless about ever
reaching his destination, when he es
pied a small and ragged urchin stand
ing dejectedly on the curb.
To Chis urchin he made his way,
and, with the hectic flush of shame
on his' cheeks, addressed him almost
apologetically. ' '
"I er want to go to the Corpor
ation Electric Light Station," he mur
mured. , ""
The youngster eyed him sourly for
"AU right," he said; "you may go
there this time. Trot along!"
"Yes," said the old African ex
plorer, "I once found myself 'in dan
ger from a lion at a time when Ivhad
no -weapon witih which to protect
myself. So I tried the very experi
ment' which you have just suggested
of sitting down and staring at
"4h!" exclaimed the scientist,
"That is interesting. And did the ex
periment work?'' '
."Perfectly perfectly! .Why, the
lion didn't even offer to touch me."
The scientist rose 'to his feet in a
state of great excitement and was
beginning to bubble something about
confirmation of his theories when the
"You see," he remarked, puffing
contentedly at his cigar, "I chose to
sit on a high branch of a very tall
o o -
"Won't you come and sit on my
knee?" asked the visitor. "Mamma
told me to sit on this chair, an hide
the hole in it until she came-downf.
stairs," faltered little Susie, ."""