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Newspaper Page Text
HE WONDERED r
When Mr. Abbott called on a young
iwoman one evening he was being
entertained by her young-brother,
7 Andrew, until she mad her appear-
. 1 .. .. . ".
ii yau aoni give me a quarter,
said little Andrew, 'Tin going to tell
"about you kissirifc my sister."
r- "But I hadnl thought of kissing
I I vour sister'' nrritested Mr. Abbott. '
""You ain't? ""sajd Andfew, plainly
guz2.zlgd. "Then wiat did he pay me
to' say-that to you for?" N. Y.
EWorld.. . , " Z
W r '-
HAD HAD TWO k "
'INo man can serve two masters,"
observed the good parson, who .was
siting the penitentiary.
T 'i feiow it," replied Convict 1313.
rm here ror Digamy."
hns-.. - t.N;i l.i i i.:
5 Hep." "Then you deserve to be com
plimented." N. Y. World.
CERTA'NLY? KNOTT, SAID WATT
"Burr-r-rr!" went the telephone,
and the following dialogue ensued:
"Are you there?"
"Who are you, please?"
"What is your name, please?"
"Watt's my name." ' "
"Yes, what is your name?"
"I say my name is Watt John
"Oh! Well, I'm coming round to
see you this afternoon."
- "All right Are you Jones?"
"No; I'm Knott"
"Who are youthen, please?" i
"Why won't you?"
"I say my name is William Knott."
"Oh! I beg pardoriT"
"Then youTl be In this afternoon
if I come round, Watt?" . -
"Certainly, Knott"- v -
"Burr-r-rr!"went the ring-off; and
Knott, as he ''sat down again at his
desk, began to ponder whether Watt
said he would be in or not Tit-bit...
o o K
"Yes," mused the old sea captain, .
"when I was shipwrecked In South'
America I came across a tribe of wild
women who had no tongues."
"Mercy!" cried one of his listeners
of the fair sex. "How could they
"They couldn't," snapped the oIJ
salt "That's what made Jem wild."
N. Y. World.
The little, mild, bald man had settled-
dgwn in the train to read, and,
fueling drowsy after a trying day at
business, fell asleep. On the hat-.
rack above was a ferocious crab in a
bucket, and. reaching the edge xf the
rack, it fell, alighting on th'e little
man's shoulder, and grabbed his ear
to steady itself. All the passengers
waited expectantly for developments,
but all they heard was: ''Bet go,
Sarah! I tell you I've been at the of
fice all the jevenhig!"